"I check out guys sometimes." It came out fast because that was the first time I'd said it aloud. It felt like relief. And terror. Carter didn't say anything for a minute. And then he said, "Oh. Okay. Did you lick his balls?" I laughed so hard that I thought I would die. Carter was laughing right along with me. He said, "You know I don't give a shit, right? Like, of all the things in the world to freak out about, that's one of the least?"