I need it. I want it. I want to feel at peace, my soul at rest. I don't want this pus-filled anger to gnaw at me night and day, my rage just a hollow tomb that I enclose myself in day and night ... It's so lonely when you don't even know yourself. I'm empty. I'm weak. I just want to be filled with good feelings and happiness. None of this hatred, this contempt that has been rotting away at my belly for years. How can I cure myself? How can I find a way to get that cancer out of me?