"go through an exercise that helps me to get present to the reality of the situation. I tell my story to myself from the perspective of a victim, then I tell the exact same story from a place of 100 percent responsibility. Victim: "I was late to an important event because my girlfriend took too long to get ready. It's not my fault." Responsible: "I acknowledge my breakdown in being late. In the future I am committed to making sure that I do everything I can to ensure that I'm on time."