"Because conflict-avoidant Emily would never "bite" or even hiss unless Greg had done something truly horrible, on some level she processes his bite to mean that she's terribly guilty-- of something, anything, who knows what? Emily's guilt feels so intolerable that she tends to deny the validity of all of Greg's claims-- the legitimate ones along with those exaggerated by anger. This, of course, leads to a vicious cycle in which she shuts down her natural empathy and Greg feels unheard."