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5e9d8e4
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I hate France. It's like the whole country's on a diet
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food
france
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Gordon Korman |
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909561b
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He watched in awe as she stacked up an enormous armload of music. "There," she finished, slapping Frank Zappa's Greatest Hits on top of the pile. "That should do for a start." "You are a music lover," said the wide-eyed cashier. "No, I'm a kleptomaniac." And she dashed out the door. He was so utterly shocked that it took him a moment to run after her. With a meaningful nod in the direction of the astounded Cahills, she barreled down the..
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humor
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Gordon Korman |
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b462e4c
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Don't think of it as losing a boyfriend. Think of it as gaining a stalker." -Dan Cahill"
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Gordon Korman |
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da68901
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The dog always dies. Go to the library and pick out a book with an award sticker and a dog on the cover. Trust me, that dog is going down.
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Gordon Korman |
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6a39a12
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For someone who'e smarter than a supercomputer, sometimes you're a real idiot.
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science
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Gordon Korman |
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645d1b7
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Don't have to see," the pilot grunted. " knows the way." "Funny name for an aircraft," Grace commented. "Is it after your wife?" "My gun." Grace stared at him. "You named your plane after a ?" "It was a very good gun."
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rising
vespers
cahill
grace
pilot
gun
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Gordon Korman |
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b8eb36b
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No fair! Those guys ripped off what we rightfully stole!
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Gordon Korman |
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a0f1950
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In our family, you don't get a childhood. We're too busy trying to dominate the world.
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amy
cahill
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Gordon Korman |
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667dfca
|
The au pair was bug-eyed. "What happened back there?" "It's not our fault!" Dan babbled. "Those guys are crazy! They're like mini-Darth Vaders without the mask!" "They're Benedictine monks!" Nellie exclaimed. "They're men of peace! Most of them are under vows of silence!" "Yeah, well, not anymore," Dan told her. "They cursed us out pretty good. I don't know the language, but some things you don't have to translate."
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humor
nellie-gomez
dan-cahill
cursing
the39clues
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Gordon Korman |
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e10e4d5
|
Oh, no-" They weren't even on the runway, and Jonah's father was already immersed in his BlackBerry. "Remember those 'Live Large with the Wiz Generation' posters? Well, guess how that translates into Chinese- 'Jonah Wizard Makes Your Ancestors Fat'."
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jonah-wizard
translation
mistake
joke
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Gordon Korman |
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146bd02
|
Why can't you just lie and cheat like the others?" Dan snapped. "Can't you just see that's better than being nice one minute and then turning around and selling us out? It may be very Cahill, but it ! Grace had a saying: Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, I'll conk you with this pet carrier!"
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cahill
dan
grace
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Gordon Korman |
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fd2da4b
|
Ian Kabra rolled up his window. "My god, what's that smell?" Behind the wheel, Sinead laughed. "It's called fresh air. Growing up in London, you've probably never breathed it before." "And I hope I never breathe it again."
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Gordon Korman |
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ea24e46
|
We didn't stow away!" Dan protested. "You sunk our boat and pulled us out of the canal!" "Good point," Ian agreed. "Return them to the canal. Roughly, please."
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humor
ian-kabra
dan-cahill
venice
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Gordon Korman |
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5681000
|
Nellie grinned. "I always wanted to go to Venice. It's supposed to be the romance capital of the world." "Sweet," put in Dan. "Too bad your date is an Egyptian Mau on a hunger strike." The au pair sighed. "Better than an eleven-year-old with a big mouth."
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romance
dates
saladin
nellie-gomez
dan-cahill
venice
the39clues
|
Gordon Korman |
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794cd17
|
Sinead broke in. "The cops need to know what to do with Evan, Amy. What should I tell them?" "Shoot to kill?" Ian suggested."
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Gordon Korman |
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445c663
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What does it feel like to get shot?" "I don't recommend it," said Nellie in a controlled voice. "Chocolate is definitely better."
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Gordon Korman |
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648f885
|
For someone who's smarter than a supercomputer, sometimes you're a real idiot.
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stupidity
natalie-kabra
the39clues
|
Gordon Korman |
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d93fd03
|
Who's Evan?" Ian asked. "Amy's boyfriend!" "Amy, since when do you have a boyfriend?" Ian probed. "Since !"
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Gordon Korman |
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58e7d15
|
You don't get Billie Joe Armstrong's autograph on your forehead without following your instincts.
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gomez
nellie
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Gordon Korman |
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d152847
|
Who's that new guy with the snooty accent who came out and talked to the police?" Evan persisted. "He looks like some kind of male model." "That's just my cousin Ian," Amy explained. "Not much of a family resemblance," Evan noted sourly. "He's like a twenty-fifth cousin, ten times removed." Evan was not satisfied." --
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Gordon Korman |
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931c89d
|
Dan instantly recognized the angry scratch that stretched from the corner of Ian's eye all the way along the olive skin to his chin. "Have you been messing with Saladin?" "No. Saladin has been messing with me," Ian shot back. "He isn't big on Lucians," Dan explained. "Animals are really good judges of character."
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Gordon Korman |
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b6da3ea
|
We don't have to love it. We just have to steal it.
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Gordon Korman |
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45cc6b7
|
The phone rang in the comm. center. Ian consulted the monitor. "It's Dan." He pressed a button. "Kabra here." Dan's voice crackled through the attic. "Don't say it like that," he complained. "Your name still gives me heartburn."
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Gordon Korman |
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1fdfedb
|
Amy turned to Nellie. "Can you create a diversion to draw the clerk outside?" The au pair was wary. "What kind of diversion?" "You could pretend to be lost," Dan proposed. "The guy comes out to give you directions, and we slip inside." "That's the most sexist idea I've ever heard," Nellie said harshly. "I'm female, so I have to be clueless. He's male, so he's got a great sense of direction." "Maybe you're from out of town," Dan suggested. "..
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|
music
diversions
kleptomaniacs
saladin
nellie-gomez
dan-cahill
the39clues
|
Gordon Korman |
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e7987d6
|
Hold still," Sinead ordered. "And don't be such a baby." She dabbed at the angry red mark behind Ian's ear. "Cat scratches are prone to infection, you know." "And that's fault?" Ian raged. "Why don't you lock that animal in the cellar? Or, better still, send him to a violen string factory! What this stuff-acid?" "My own concoction," she replied cheerfully. "Amy and I use it on our blisters when we do marathon training. Soothing, right..
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Gordon Korman |
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508534b
|
Nobody got me out," Nellie replied. "They just let me go. They think I'm a deranged Jonah Wizard fan. Apparently, the hotel's full of them. A couple of idiots actually jumped off the front balcony. Can you picture that?" "In Technicolor," Amy said bitterly. "That low-down KGB reject!" Dan fumed. "I can't believe she cheated me-right when I was in the middle of cheating her!"
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humor
jonah-wizard
nellie-gomez
the39clues
|
Gordon Korman |
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abb4d68
|
Hold still," Sinead ordered. "And don't be such a baby." She dabbed at the angry red mark behind Ian's ear. "Cat scratches are prone to infection, you know." "And that's fault?" Ian raged. "Why don't you lock that animal in the cellar? Or, better still, send him to a violen string factory! What this stuff-acid?" "My own concoction," she replied cheerfully. "Amy and I use it on our blisters when we do marathon training. Soothing, right..
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Gordon Korman |
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a4fb1dc
|
Dan was suspicious. "How did he find out where we were staying?" Amy frowned. "I think that's the message inside the message. He wants us to know that he has a long reach-that's he's rich and powerful." "Like we'll see his giant mansion and assume he works at Burger King," scoffed Dan."
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Gordon Korman |
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2cc589e
|
Hamilton had a complaint. "Why did you have to tell the cops I'm your boyfriend? That's gross, Amy. We're related!" Amy was disgusted. "We had a common ancestor, like, five hundred years ago. Besides, if they think we're together, we only have to come up with one story, and I can do all the talking." "Hey, I got an early acceptance to Notre Dame," Hamilton said defensively. "I can talk." "Of course you can," Amy soothed. "It's what you say ..
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Gordon Korman |
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e387478
|
When we lock things away," he said with conviction, "we're really imprisoning ourselves."
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lock-away
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Gordon Korman |
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421934b
|
Jonah spoke what everyone was thinking. "Wouldn't it be Twilight Zone if the door was open, too?" Hamilton tried the knob. It didn't budge. Ian stepped forward and examined the lock. "Natalie's diary has better security than this." He produced a credit card and slipped it between the latch and the jamb. There was a click, and the door swung wide."
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Gordon Korman |
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c915d09
|
Global warming doesn't care what's in your bank account." -Sinead Starling"
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Gordon Korman |
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94fefdf
|
Desperately, Phoenix attempted to maneuver both tips of the instrument around the bullet. He knew that each move caused Nellie unimaginable pain, but he could not grasp the target. "It's no use," he sobbed. "And my hand is going numb." In a frenzy, Nellie shouted something into the gag, but no one could understand her. "I beg your pardon, child?" queried Alistair. Nellie spat out the rag and rasped, "Get the Kabra chick!" "Natalie?" Fiske e..
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Gordon Korman |
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4acfd01
|
Amy hugged Sinead, and Dan scratched Saladin. "Later, Saladin. Take it easy on Kabra. On second thought, don't."
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Gordon Korman |
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b9f2be7
|
Amy was profoundly shocked. "A little over an hour ago, our bus was attacked by three men in ski masks. They definitely knew me, and probably Dan, too. We fought them off, but it could've gone either way." "Like if they'd used a cookie truck instead of a gas tanker," Dan added. "Nobody's scared of Oreos."
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Gordon Korman |
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04320f5
|
Come on, who saw what happened?" "I did," I volenteered. "Well?" "Buttwipe wanted to know what jerkface was looking at." I turned turned eyes on the bloody and dirt-smeared brawlers. "You were barely 3-inches apart. Couldn't you see that you were both looking at each other?" The teacher's face reddened. "Who do you think you are? Jerry Seinfeld?" "You must be confused with another student," I told him. "My name is Capricorn Anderson."
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Gordon Korman |
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32fd806
|
Where's Amy?" Ian put in. "Will you please get her to call that Evan character? He rings here twenty times a day. He's either the most mule-headed person who ever lived, or he really likes your sister. She has to have mercy on him-on all of us!"
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|
Gordon Korman |
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b90c342
|
The key to the city of Florence was about two feet long, and painted a garish gold. Hamilton was fascinated by it. "Wow! How big is the lock?" Jonah laughed. "There is no lock, cuz. It's an honorary gig. Back in my crib in LA, I've got a whole shed full of keys from different cities. Want to know the kicker? I can't get at them. The gardener lost the key to the shed."
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|
|
Gordon Korman |
|
bf06fd7
|
It was no place for a Kabra, not even a poor one living in exile with a psychopathic cat. He approached the counter and rand the bell with authority. The clerk turned around. Evan Tolliver. "You're Amy's cousin!" "Yes, I am," Ian confirmed. "I have here a list of items-" "Have you heard from her?" Evan interrupted. "Is she okay?" "Her health is excellent." "No, I mean-" Ian sighed. "Why should you care? She promises to phone you, and she do..
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|
|
Gordon Korman |
|
129c733
|
Come on, who saw what happened?" "I did," I volenteered. "Well?" "Buttwipe wanted to know what jerkface was looking at." I turned turned eyes on the bloody and dirt-smeared brawlers. "You were barely 3-inches apart. Couldn't you see that you were both looking at each other?" The teacher's face reddened. "Who do you think you are? Jerry Seinfeld?" "You must be confused with another student," I told him. "My name is Capricorn Anderson." -..
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Gordon Korman |
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126a3ee
|
Yeah!" shouted Jonah, twirling the much larger Hamilton around the restaurant in a victory dance. The other diners watched in amazement. This wild display was hardly the public image of the too-cool-for-school Jonah Wizard. "What's the matter?" Hamilton challenged. "Haven't you ever seen a happy rapper before?" --
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|
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Gordon Korman |
|
197c0bb
|
Ian sighed wanly. "I once had the means to be gaga over art-before I found myself in a country where the standard of beauty is toaster waffles shaped like cartoon characters."
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|
Gordon Korman |
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75c363c
|
Here's some more stuff we're going to need." 1 pair coveralls 1 extension ladder (30 foot) 1 glass cutter 1 artist's portfolio (large) 1 water pistol 1 bottle india ink 1 portable trampoline (collapsible) 1 bicycle w/basket 4 pizza boxes Jonah whistled. "I hope you've got some crazy evil-genius strategy, 'cause-straight up-I don't get it."
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|
|
Gordon Korman |
|
61e4810
|
The computer beeped as the upload completed. A moment later, Ian Kabra appeared on the screen. Dan was surprised. "Hey, Ian, isn't it, like, two in the morning back there?" "It's called jet lag," Ian informed him. "I'm still on London time. I don't suppose you savages have any tea in this mausoleum." "There's a diet Snapple in the fridge." Ian shuddered. "I thought not."
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Gordon Korman |