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ebb3079
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I love it when my justifications for avoiding housework are actually legitimate.
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humor
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Julie Kenner |
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df14ff6
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Can I just say that dying sucks? All that bullshit about seeing the light and having this inner peace, blah, blah, blah. It's crap.
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Julie Kenner |
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88fdbd8
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Distract him? What the hell was I supposed to do? Strip naked and do the hula?
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Julie Kenner |
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38c3d4c
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No, I wanna go kick puppies," she retorted."
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puppies
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Julie Kenner |
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3fde164
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They weren't wearing their handy-dandy I'm an Evil Demon T-shirts; nevertheless, I could tell they were coming for me.
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Julie Kenner |
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9f86c82
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They served "Good Food" but only a G, an O and a D were lit up. Personally, I doubted God dined there. Unless God was keen on samonella poisoning and rat droppings in the hamburgers. But then again, what did I know?"
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god
humor
hamburgers
food
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Julie Kenner |
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022e9d8
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Fuck you. I countered, demonstrating my keen skill at argument.
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Julie Kenner |
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4055d7a
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What? Look at my newly mutilated flesh? Screw you!
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Julie Kenner |
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93a566e
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I mean, really. Who needs Pilates when you've got a town full of demons?
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Julie Kenner |
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9138560
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My meeting with my alimentatore was at noon,
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Julie Kenner |
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697ad71
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Once upon a time, I'd thought demon-hunting was hard. But that was before I'd become a mom. Trust me. In comparison to parenting, stalking and killing demons is a piece of cake.
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Julie Kenner |
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52eaaa8
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opened the vial of holy water and dumped it in with the wipes. I could practically see the ad campaign: Blessed be your baby's bottom ... Now with Aloe!
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Julie Kenner |
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b5998d4
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That's the bittersweet part of being a mom. You slather on all that love and attention so that your kids will grow up strong, confident, and self-sufficient. And if you've done your job right, you've raised grown-ups who can go off and manage just fine without you.
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Julie Kenner |