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3f44870
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Powder blue is a sissy color.
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Janet Evanovich |
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c727d24
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I might be a stay-at-home mother someday, but I'll always be trying to fly off the garage roof. That's just who I am.
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Janet Evanovich |
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629e363
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Fifteen minutes later I was dressed in four-inch FMPs (short for "fuck-me pumps," because when you walked around in them you looked like Whorehouse Wonder Bitch). I shimmied into a low-cut black knit dress that was bought with the intent of losing five pounds, gunked up my eyes with a lot of black mascara and beefed up my cleavage by stuffing Nerf balls into my bra. Ranger was parked on Roebling, half a block from the funeral home. He didn'..
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Janet Evanovich |
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36be284
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He could freeze his stupid dick off for all I cared.
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Janet Evanovich |
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b423a09
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There are lots of things we've never talked about." "Such as?" "Children. Suppose we have children and it turns out we don't like them?" "If we can like Bob, we can like anything," Morelli said. Bob was in the living room licking lint off the carpet."
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Janet Evanovich |
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4bcbad2
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Count me in." Jake put his things back in the rucksack, slung it over his shoulder, and stood up. "The kids can finish up this project." "You've taught them how to make land mines?" "I wouldn't be much of a grandfather if I didn't."
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Janet Evanovich |
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e03a7e2
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Ranger pulled onto the shoulder and reprogrammed the GPS system. "Lucky for you, you look good in a T-shirt," Ranger said. "Lucky for you I don't have a gun on me." Ranger turned to me. His voice was low and even, but there was a whisper of incredulous disbelief. "You're not carrying a gun?" "Didn't seem necessary for us both to have one."
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Janet Evanovich |
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1dd5041
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Grandma ladled out oatmeal for the three of us. She and I took our bowls into the dining area, and Bob ate his in the kitchen. When Grandma and I went back to the kitchen, Bob's bowl was empty. The cardboard box that used to hold the cake was also empty. "Guess Bob's got a sweet tooth," Grandma said. I shook my finger at him. "That was rude. And besides, you'll get fat." Bob wagged his tail."
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Janet Evanovich |
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fea67e0
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Ranger removed my goggles. "Would you like to come home with me?" I stepped away from him. "Thank you for the offer, but no. I'm done with men." Ranger smiled. "Forever?" "Until I figure some things out." "And if you don't figure them out?" "If I can't figure them out on my own, I'll ask you to help me." "Babe, that's like the blind leading the blind."
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Janet Evanovich |
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84c5622
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What I lack in expertise I make up for with desperation and tenacity, because I only get paid when I catch someone.
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Janet Evanovich |
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c8957f9
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Whoa. Time out. It's been a long, stressful day, but let's not talk crazy.
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Janet Evanovich |
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de714e3
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I set the box of biscuits on the counter and went to the bathroom, and when I returned the biscuits were gone. Only a slobbery, mangled corner of the box remained.
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Janet Evanovich |
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1ff1078
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Money isn't everything.''The only people who say that are people who have enough money to pay the rent.
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poverty
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Janet Evanovich |
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50b0857
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My instructions were to disable the car, but one of my men bet Hal a burger he couldn't get the engine out. So Hal removed the engine.
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Janet Evanovich |
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cc48dc3
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was standing facing my car, and behind me, I could hear windows being thrown open in my apartment building. It was Lorraine in her nightie and Mo in his cap. They'd just settled their brains for a long winter's nap in front of the television. When out in the lot there arose such a clatter, they sprang from their recliners to see what was the matter. Away to the window they flew like a flash, tore open the blinds and threw up the sash. And w..
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Janet Evanovich |
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a6e4455
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You come from a long line of scary women" Ranger finally said."
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Janet Evanovich |
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c6ef393
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slipped onto the passenger seat, and Ranger leaned over and kissed me just below my ear. It was a hello kiss. Nothing serious. If I wanted it to get serious all I had to do was smile.
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Janet Evanovich |
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07b9e97
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Ranger slung an arm around my shoulders and kissed me on the top of my head. "Someday I need to talk to you about car care." "I know about car care. I kept a case of motor oil in the back." "That's my girl." His Porsche 911 turbo"
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Janet Evanovich |
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4e1300d
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The third message was from my mother. 'Why me?' she said. 'Why do I have to have a daughter who finds dead bodies? Where did I go wrong? Emily Beeber's daughter never finds dead bodies. Joanne Melanowski's daughter never finds dead bodies. Why me!' News travels fast in the Burg.
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Janet Evanovich |
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9ee87fc
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You'd really go all the way to Greece, and run a covert operation again, just so I can have the satisfaction of capturing Nick Fox?" "Sure," he said. "We don't get nearly enough quality father-daughter time."
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Janet Evanovich |
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56cf128
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Hey," I said, "dogs are people, too."
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Janet Evanovich |
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563bdf0
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Your grandmother needs a ride to the viewing, and I'm holding you responsible if she shoots someone, gets arrested, or tries to take a selfie with the deceased.
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Janet Evanovich |
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117b0ce
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The man was irresistible. What's with that? she thought. It was like wanting to bake cookies for the spawn of Satan.
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Janet Evanovich |
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ecad576
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You're not suggesting we do it in this tiny closet with two men watching television in the next room, are you?" "It'd be limiting," Ranger said, "but at least you wouldn't have your ass on the horn."
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Janet Evanovich |
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e80dfb9
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May misfortune follow us the rest of our lives, but never catch up.
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Janet Evanovich |
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5573802
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Working at Rangeman is a high-stress job, and you're one of our few sources of comic relief. I give you a car and my men start a pool on how long it will take you to trash it. You're a line item in my budget under entertainment.
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Janet Evanovich |
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cc910d6
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I'll have one of my men drop a car off for you." "Thanks. I'll try not to lose it." "If you can manage to keep it intact for a week, it's yours. If it gets stolen, blown up, crushed by a garbage truck, set on fire, filled with cement, or dies an untimely death by any other means, I'll expect you to spend the night with me."
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Janet Evanovich |
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55923db
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They got stuff here that I didn't even know existed. Everything's spandex and sequins. It's a retired ho's dream come true.
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Janet Evanovich |
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82be3a7
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Suppose I was able to get to court, and the zombies followed me there, and they ate all the people's brains who were in the court?' 'This is Trenton,' Lula said. 'You might not notice.
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zombies
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Janet Evanovich |
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1438322
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The difference between adventure and adversity is attitude.
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Janet Evanovich |
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104a48c
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An orgasm is an orgasm, but getting there can leave you with a herniated disc if you aren't careful.
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Janet Evanovich |
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9397249
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For the better part of my childhood, my professional aspirations were simple--I wanted to be an intergalactic princess. I didn't care much about ruling hordes of space people. Mostly I wanted to wear the cape and the sexy boots and carry a cool weapon.
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Janet Evanovich |
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503bcee
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Children. Suppose we have children and it turns out we don't like them?" "If we can like Bob, we can like anything," Morelli said. Bob was in the living room licking lint off the carpet."
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Janet Evanovich |
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3912faa
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If Lula was a pastry she'd be a big chocolate cupcake with a lot of frosting. I'd be more of a croissant with a ponytail.
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Janet Evanovich |
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20318e7
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I try hard not to make the same mistake more than 3 or 4 times in a row.
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Janet Evanovich |
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8c8edb9
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Girl, you could use those gift cards!
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Janet Evanovich |
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0fb58c6
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Are you hungry?" Grandma asked me. "Do you need breakfast?" "I'm famished!" --
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Janet Evanovich |
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5db9024
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Say what? There's no 'and he got naked and waved his magic wand?' 'Nope,' Connie said. 'No magic wand. She didn't get to see the wand.' 'Well, you know he got one,' Lula said. 'How come he didn't wave it and make her a happy princess?
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Janet Evanovich |
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34b9046
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I introduced myself and told him I was looking for his dad. 'Haven't seen him,' he said. 'We aren't close. He's an even bigger dick than me. I mean, dude, he named me Oswald.
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Janet Evanovich |
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610f385
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You could always count on melted cheese to have a calming effect.
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Janet Evanovich |
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35ccd9b
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I carted the basket into my bedroom, set it on the floor, and my cell phone rang. 'Bitch,' Joyce Barnhardt said when I answered. 'Do you have a problem?' 'You poisoned me.' 'I don't know what you're talking about.' 'Don't play dumb. You knew exactly what you were doing when you forced that pork on me.' 'Gee, I'd really like to talk to you, Joyce, but I have to go do something.' 'I'll get you for this. As soon as I can leave the bathroom.
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Janet Evanovich |
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512e2cc
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Okay, but who knows what happens at night? They could come alive like the zombies." I turned the corner and drove to my parents' house. "You need cake." "Hell, yeah."
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Janet Evanovich |
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4305f94
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I sent Hal and Rafael to keep an eye on you, and I went to check on a commercial account in Whitehorse. Rafael called to tell me Lula went in with a rocket launcher, so I skipped Whitehorse. I pulled into the lot seconds before you destroyed Billings Foods.
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Janet Evanovich |
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828bd86
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She's a silly old lady,' my mother said. 'You could be a good Christian and turn the other cheek.' 'I'm a plenty good Christian,' Grandma said, 'but I got it on good authority that God wants me to get Bella for Him.
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Janet Evanovich |