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864f216
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Sometimes a wild horse needs to feel that his rider is just a little bit wilder.
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fantasy
horse
ruby
strength-through-adversity
womanhood
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Francesca Lia Block |
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d135fda
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So I left my wonderfully intelligent family and soaked myself in the bath and considered drowning myself. Then I remembered I still had chocolate cake left over from yesterday so I came back up for air. Some things are worth living for.
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ruby
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Cecelia Ahern |
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29bf95e
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Childbirth is nothing compared to exercise, and Gary was a big baby. This is what they should do to prisoners of war when they're trying to interrogate them.
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ruby
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Cecelia Ahern |
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8690eec
|
"Ruby: I've decided. I'm putting my Gary on a diet. Rosie: You're putting him on a diet? How on earth can you control what your twenty-one-year-old son eats? Ruby: Oh it's easy; I'll just nail down everything to the floor. Rosie: So what kind of diet is it? Ruby: I don't know. I bought a magazine, but there are so many stupid diets out there I don't know which one to pick. Remember that ridiculous one that you and I did last year? The alphabet one where we had to eat foods beginning with a certain letter every day? Rosie: Oh yeah! How long did we do that for?! Ruby: Em . . . that would be 26 days of course Rosie Rosie: Oh . . . right . . . of course. You put on weight on the third day. Ruby: That's because the third day was the lucky letter "C" . . . Cakes . . . mmmm Rosie: Well we made up for it on the last day. I was bloody starving on "Z" day; I was practically chasing zebras with a kitchen knife around the zoo. Could have eaten the zoo I suppose . . . Ruby: You should have done what I did, I ate like a queen. I became German for the day and ate "ze cakes" and "ze buns." Oh I don't know Rosie. I think I'll just invent a diet of my own and give those stupid magazines a run for their money"
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ruby
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Cecelia Ahern |
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ac539ab
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The hips were the leaders of this conspiracy. So I rang my boss and held the phone to my hips so he could hear them too.
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humor
ruby
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Cecelia Ahern |