|
9b90c36
|
Normal: lacking in taste, compassion, understanding, kindness, and ordinary human decency.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
90d578a
|
High School is the penalty for transgressions yet to be specified.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
82e2174
|
Monty Python: A documentary series on everyday life in Great Britain.
|
|
monty-python
|
Frank Portman |
|
f327b89
|
Maybe they notice me wincing whenever I hear them say it, but I don't know: there are all sorts of reasons I could be wincing. Life is a wince-a-thon.
|
|
cringe
wince
nickname
high-school
|
Frank Portman |
|
c0c935c
|
There's always a bit of suspense about the particular way in which a given school year will get off to a bad start.
|
|
humor
school
|
Frank Portman |
|
fb2eefa
|
Girls have all the same parts, basically, and so much of how they look depends on the attitude, expectations, and obsessions of those who are looking at them.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
cfa35c4
|
D and D: a role-playing game played only by very cool guys.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
25be3e2
|
I was starting to realize the extent of the problem here: everyone is always lying to each other, and even when they're trying to tell the truth, it can still be misleading or wrong. In fact, it almost always is wrong from at least one angle. I mean, the truth is really just a better class of lie.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
93af8ce
|
Sam Hellerman is a genius!
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
87d72c4
|
It was more like an abortion than music, but he got a wildly enthusiastic response from the crowd. Well, we're all pro-choice out here in Hillmont, after all.
|
|
music
|
Frank Portman |
|
8f3061e
|
I felt bad, but I did it anyway, because I'm only human. I was ashamed of myself and depressed afterward, though, which is human, too, I guess. Being human is an excuse for just about everything, but it also kind of sucks in a way.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
e3feda7
|
I felt bad because Little Big Tom came in while we were making the tape and was like over the moon because he thought we were interested in his music. We had to humor him and listen to him deliver around six hundred speeches about fusion and the Art Ensemble of Chicago and Chicano and Latino influences on pretentious jazzy pseudorock. I think it was probably the happiest I'd ever seen him. And I also felt bad about the fact that after he le..
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
7ee193d
|
You can make something mean anything you want. And you can spend a great deal of time and effort choosing your words and allusions and quotations carefully and hardly anyone will even notice or get it anyway.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
4f56b10
|
And as for you, Holden, old son: if you happen to meet my body coming through the rye, I'd really appreciate it if you'd just stand aside and get out of my fucking way.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
b7081e5
|
1975 was a great year for rock and roll, and don't believe anyone who tells you different.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
e37a313
|
No one does antimaterialism better than multigazillionaire rock stars.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
5db7d90
|
Life is a wince-a-thon.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
aa6ca55
|
Communication is pointless and we're all doomed.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
d3e81f7
|
I'm not any religion myself, but for the record, I'm pretty sure I do believe in God. It's just a feeling I have. I can't prove it, but since when are you supposed to prove a feeling? God is the only situation where they expect you to do that. Plus, God embarrasses people. Which I totally enjoy.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
0645b6f
|
Dance Dance Revolution was, however, no enticement whatsoever to one who had tasted the delights of the King of Sacramento's shadowed chamber.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
f61651a
|
I was starting to realize the extent of the problem here: everyone is always lying to each other, and even when they're trying to tell the truth, it can still be misleading or wrong. In fact, it almost always is wrong from at least one angle. I mean, in a way, the truth is really just a better class of lie.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
1d4b98f
|
When I dream of how it would be if I were suddenly transformed into the kind of guy that does not repulse the females of our species, I don't necessarily think of any particular girl. Pick
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
c4f8d89
|
And believe me, you don't want to be around Migraine Mom. I strongly recommend avoiding that subject.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
66f998f
|
What he meant was that he had fixed some vegetarian slop with lentils and bean-curd lumps and weird-tasting fake cheese, and that we were welcome to have a crack at choking some of it down. So Sam Hellerman hightailed it out of there. Lucky bastard.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
cb74b8f
|
Now, if this were a murder mystery, and I were a weird Belgian guy with a big mustache, this is the point where I would suddenly stop dead, drop my tiny glass of chocolate liqueur, and say something like "But no! But I have been an imbecile! Imbecile!" And then you'd have to wait another fifty pages or so to find out exactly what the hell I had been talking about. But I won't do that to you. The salutation"
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
78dc2b7
|
I'm a very spiritual person," she likes to say, for instance. Like when she's explaining how she hates religion and all those who practice it. Well, okay, if it makes you feel better, Carol."
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
c4202ff
|
The guy who wrote The Doors of Perception got off way easier, though, especially since the worst band in the history of the world, the Doors, named themselves after it. He has a lot to answer for.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
2a1cf39
|
My attention was temporarily thrown off course, because of the possibly decent band name. Hot Underwear: Jesus the Thong Burglar on guitar and vox, Hellerman Schmellerman on bass and vox, "Phil Rudd" on drums, first album Wet and Loaded. The album cover possibilities alone would ... But I digress."
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
a04f193
|
He was probably a Sagittarius, like Rosalie herself, born with a quiver of arrows, and a license to be an asshole.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
017aeec
|
HIGH SCHOOL IS THE PENALTY FOR TRANSGRESSIONS YET TO BE SPECIFIED
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
b2a278a
|
I mean, everything beats me, even twos and threes.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
2a2c315
|
The entire second-period sophomore girls' PE class thought my balls were uniquely and supremely beneath contempt. Great.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
ce27e7c
|
You start by allowing your own world to be corrupted by their warped values, and then you gradually start using their sadistic methods and eventually end up adopting bits of their sick ideology. And even then, when you have become just like them, they will eventually turn on you anyway. Normal people are savage beasts.
|
|
|
Frank Portman |
|
127a082
|
Basically, Sam Phillips recorded Bill Haley, Johnny Cash, and all those other Memphis guys; Chuck Berry played the top two strings; Elvis appeared on The Ed Sullivan Show above the waist; the Beatles made all the girls squirm by singing about wanting to hold their "hands"; Ray Davies got lost in a sunset; Pete Townshend smashed his guitar; Brian Wilson heard magic in his head and made it come out of a studio; the Rolling Stones urinated on ..
|
|
|
Frank Portman |