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8ef85f9
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In life, people tend to wait for good things to come to them. And by waiting, they miss out. Usually, what you wish for doesn't fall in your lap; it falls somewhere nearby, and you have to recognize it, stand up, and put in the time and work it takes to get to it. This isn't because the universe is cruel. It's because the universe is smart. It has its own cat-string theory and knows we don't appreciate things that fall into our laps.
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inspirational
seduction
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Neil Strauss |
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2ca5967
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Without commitment, you cannot have depth in anything, whether it's a relationship, a business or a hobby.
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Neil Strauss |
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527ffc2
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If there was anything I'd learned, it's that the man never chooses the woman. All he can do is give her an opportunity to choose him.
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Neil Strauss |
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c095fa1
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Men are not dogs. We merely think we are and, on occasion, act as if we are. But, by believing in our nobler nature, women have the amazing power to inspire us to live up to it.
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relationships
love
gender-stereotypes
men-and-women
power
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Neil Strauss |
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2dd7de3
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The strong live off the weak and the clever live off the strong.
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Neil Strauss |
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cf12c70
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After all, everyone's favorite subject is themselves.
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Neil Strauss |
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eb2dc93
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It's not lying, it's flirting.
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Neil Strauss |
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e7dbcff
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One of the things I'd learned ... was how to take a compliment. Just say, "Thank you." It's the only response a confident person can make."
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Neil Strauss |
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b6079c3
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We're just fragile machines programmed with a false sense of our own importance. And every now and then the universe sends a reminder that we don't really matter to it...
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Neil Strauss |
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d21abda
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there are only so many ways to get rejected or ignored. It doesn't hurt at all anymore because why should someone who's a complete stranger have any control over your sense of selfworth?
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Neil Strauss |
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e97a7dd
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Most people seem to believe that if a relationship doesn't last until death, it's a failure. But the only relationship that's truly a failure is one that lasts longe than it should. The success of a relationship should be measured by it's depth, not by it's lenght.
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Neil Strauss |
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cc09345
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There are certain bad habits we've groomed our whole life -- from personality flaws to fashion faux pas. And it has been the role of parents and friends, outside of some minor tweaking, to reinforce the belief that we're okay just as we are. But it's not enough to just be yourself. You have to be your best self. And that's a tall order if you haven't found your best self yet.
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Neil Strauss |
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513f358
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Lying is about controlling someone else's reality, hoping that what they don't know won't hurt you.
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Neil Strauss |
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f247fa3
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I've never trusted collaborations, because most people in this world are not closers. They don't finish what they start; they don't live what they dream; they sabotage their own progress because they're afraid they won't find what they seek.
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writing
success
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Neil Strauss |
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74d99d6
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A healthy relationship is when two individuated adults decide to have a relationship and that becomes a third entity. They nurture the relationship and the relationship nurtures them. But they're not overly dependent or independent: They are interdependent, which means that they take care of the majority of their needs and wants on their own, but when they can't, they're not afraid to ask their partner for help." She pauses to let it all si..
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Neil Strauss |
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ca1b0ac
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To win the game was to leave it.
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Neil Strauss |
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6929b02
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Because, all too often, the things that we're the most resistant to are precisely what we need. And the things we're most scared to let go of are exactly the ones we most need to relinquish.
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Neil Strauss |
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5d1d26c
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In fact, every woman I met seemed disposable and replaceable. I was experiencing seducer's paradox: The better a seducer I became, the less I loved women. Success was no longer defined by getting laid or finding a girlfriend, but by how well I performed.
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Neil Strauss |
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757ddd4
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One of the reasons I became a writer is that, unlike starting a band, directing movies, or acting in a theatrical production, you can do it alone. Your success and failure depend entirely on yourself.
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writing
success
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Neil Strauss |
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1383924
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A rich man doesn't need to tell you he's rich.
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Neil Strauss |
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a75c346
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There is a downside to casual sex: Sometimes it stops being casual. People develop a desire for something more. And when one person's expectations don't match the other person's, then whoever holds the highest expectations suffers. There is no such thing as cheap sex. It always comes with a price.
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Neil Strauss |
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0ad7fd8
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The sins of the parents are the destinies of their children. Unless the children wake up and do something about it.
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Neil Strauss |
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12db1d3
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In this life, we don't meet many people who truly love us, who accept us for who we are, who put us before themselves.
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Neil Strauss |
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10b5e41
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In the dance of infatuation, we see others not as they are, but as projections of who we want them to be. And we impose on them all the imaginary criteria we think will fill the void in our hearts.
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Neil Strauss |
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38b4e5a
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We get stuck in old thought and behavior patterns that may have been effective when we were twelve months or twelve years old, but now only serve to hold us back. And, while those around us may have no problem correcting our minor flaws, they let the big ones slide, because it would mean attacking who we are.
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Neil Strauss |
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9d4015b
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Then again, no matter what your point of view may be, you can always find someone with a Ph.D to support it.
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Neil Strauss |
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d74a855
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They say that love is blind, but it's trauma that's blind. Love sees what is.
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Neil Strauss |
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a7eb307
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But who are we, really? Just a bundle of good genes and bad genes mixed with good habits and bad habits. And since there's no gene for coolness or confidence, then being uncool and unconfident are just bad habits, which can be changed with enough guidance and will power.
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Neil Strauss |
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584979e
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I used to think that a good relationship meant always getting along. But the secret, I realize, is that when one person shuts down or throws a fit, the other needs to stay in the adult ego state. If both people descend to the wounded child or adapted adolescent, that's when all forces of relationship drama and destruction are unleashed.
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Neil Strauss |
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ec5368c
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Beauty is common but what's rare is a great energy and outlook on life.
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Neil Strauss |
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823d570
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Intimacy is sharing your reality with someone else and knowing you're safe, and them being able to share their reality with you and also be safe.
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Neil Strauss |
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b7c278b
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The person who is too smart to love is truly an idiot.
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Neil Strauss |
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bcded55
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We make fun of those we're most scared of becoming.
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making-fun-of
scared
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Neil Strauss |
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ef5ee0b
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We were all searching outside ourselves for our missing pieces, and we were all looking in the wrong direction. Instead of finding ourselves, we'd lost our sense of self. Mystery didn't have the answers. A blonde 10 in a twoset at the Standard didn't have the answers. The answers were to be found within.
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Neil Strauss |
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70cba04
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STRAUSS:Have you ever thought about putting those experiences into a book? RICHIE:I did decide to write about what i experienced in climbing to the top. And finally when I got there, I discovered what was at the top.You know what was there?
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experiences
writing
life
finally
top
climbing
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Neil Strauss |
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9002331
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used to think that intelligence came from books and knowledge and rational thought. But that's not intelligence: It's just information and interpretation. Real intelligence is when your mind and your heart connect. That's when you see the truth so clearly and unmistakably that you don't have to think about it. In fact, all thinking will do is lead you away from the truth and soon you'll be back in your head, groping with a penlight in the d..
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Neil Strauss |
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d8ad574
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That's when I started to leave it behind. I realized that I got my entire validation from women. Women became like gods to me, but false gods.
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Neil Strauss |
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c12e1d3
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Love is when two (or more) hearts build a safe emotional, mental, and spiritual home that will stand strong no matter how much anyone changes on the inside or the outside. It demands only one things and expects only one thing: that each person be his or her own true self.
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love
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Neil Strauss |
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7aba666
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For all the self-improvement books I had read, I still wasn't above shallow validation-seeking. None of us were. That's why we were in the game. Sex wasn't about getting our rocks off; it was about being accepted.
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Neil Strauss |
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fc3f2c8
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There comes a time in a man's life when he looks around and realizes he's made a mess of everything. He's dug a hole for himself so deep that not only can't he get out, but he doesn't even know which way is up anymore.
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Neil Strauss |
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2c1114c
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How you do anything is how you do everything,
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Neil Strauss |
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9ea2d4b
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Loneliness is holding in a joke because you have no one to share it with.
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Neil Strauss |
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6f7806e
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We have this idea that love is supposed to last forever. But love isn't like that. It's a free-flowing energy that comes and goes when it pleases. Sometimes it stays for life; other times it stays for a second, a day, a month, or a year. So don't fear love when it comes simply because it makes you vulnerable. But don't be surprised when it leaves, either. Just be glad you had the opportunity to experience it.
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Neil Strauss |
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0985b92
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I think the existential dilemma is: We're social animals, so we all wrestle with a sense of inadequacy. But when we realize that we're not as inadequate as we thought we were, and when we realize that everybody else also thinks they're inadequate, then that ache goes away and the idea that we're not a person of value disappears to some extent.
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Neil Strauss |