|
387ebea
|
I tried to explain this to Nadine, but she kept interrupting me.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
5fc9168
|
and then Giddle became cryptic, like, if you don't already know, I can't spell it out. That was when I first sensed, but then almost as quickly suppressed, something about Giddle, which was that there might be reason to doubt everything she said.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
59196bc
|
The important matter of small-town hair p.17
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
40e2457
|
Enchantment means to want something and also to know, somewhere inside yourself, not an obvious place, that you aren't going to get it.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
a9c5cb7
|
All you can do is involve yourself totally in your own life, your own moment, Lonzi said.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
70846b6
|
I was assigned a public defender. We were all hopeful things would go differently. They did not go differently. They went this way.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
05ce1c7
|
I was in an acute case of the present tense. P.30
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
c83f567
|
Most unexpected was the sadness that followed on the heels of pleasure, like smoke from an extinguished candle.
|
|
sadness
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
1499127
|
It was only a motorcycle but it felt like a mode of being.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
0f75855
|
before she was lost to the Tenderloin, north of Fascination, up in the boisterous and dirty hotels that formed the pearls on the chain of her bare life, barer even than mine.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
3ecad93
|
I should get one of those T-shirts that says ORGASM DONOR," he said."
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
5804ce2
|
When the revolution comes it won't make any difference," Gloria said. "They'll have a special guillotine for girls like that. With an even rustier blade for the artists who ogle her."
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
eb67413
|
They toasted Gordon's departure. "To my rustication," Gordon said. "Isn't that when they boot you from Oxford?" "They just send you down to the country for a while." --
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
1c369c1
|
The rest of us lined up for debugging and muumuus.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
65a615a
|
What happens between bodies during an insurrection is more interesting than the insurrection itself.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
d4502c6
|
The cause of whose tears... could not be found in the traces on her cheeks. ...even as he knew the source of her tears was endless. bottomless and endless and not to be found in their traces. p.194
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
ec53a9c
|
people only tend to allow their own contradictions, and not those of others. It was okay to be murky to yourself, to know you weren't an angel, but other people had to be more cleanly divided into good and bad. P.357
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
3122581
|
We loved life more than the future.
|
|
mars-club
rachel-kushner
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
405072e
|
the point of the film....was about being a woman, about caring an not caring what happens to you. it was about not really caring. p.198
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
041091f
|
Through the familiar orbit east of Reno, the brothels and wrecking yards, the big puffing power plant and its cat's cradle of coils and springs and fencing, an occasional freight train and the meandering and summer-shallow Truckee River, railroad tracks and river escorting me to Fernley, where they both cut north.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
585e5b5
|
I come from reckless, unsentimental people.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
268855b
|
America was supposed to be a place ruined and homogenized by highways, that that was its unique character, crass and vulgar sameness.
|
|
concrete
homogenization
sameness
highways
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
63be712
|
pretending as they waited that time had no value and what a lie. A lie they didn't mind. They were on the clock, being paid to forsake time's value by standing under the sun like they had all day.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
bf82509
|
On that day, nothing could have seemed more romantic to me, no other scenario more like real courtship, than a Chinese movie and a hand job under a coat.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
78af83b
|
Enchantment means to want something and also to know, somewhere inside yourself, not an obvious place, that you aren't going to get it. p.71
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
740abe6
|
Certain women were best viewed from the window of a speeding car, the exaggeration of their makeup and their tight clothes. Maybe women were meant to speed past, just a blur. Like China girls. Flash, and then gone.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
ef6c393
|
Enchantment means to want something and also to know somewhere inside yourself, not an obvious place, that you aren't going to get it p.71
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
4c9b28b
|
The woman senses that time is more purely hers if she squanders it and keeps it empty, holds it, feels it pass by, and resists filling it with anything that might put some too-useful dent in its open, airy emptiness.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
e63becb
|
To show you the uselessness of the truth," he said."
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
5a65bd6
|
You couldn't hate someone who saw the world so differently.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
4a661eb
|
She was going to drink after her shift was finished. "That kind of drinking where you make a wilderness and tear a path in. You meet someone else there, deep in the woods. Go home together. Claw your way toward each the through the booze, confusion, misery, horniness."
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
f2c835d
|
P 271 There's a little songbird eaten whole, bones and everything, by French aristocrats. Illegal, and, by custom, enjoyed with a cloth over the face and head, like an executioners's hood. Maybe what we lack is tradition and elegance in our relentless destruction of nature
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
d54aa95
|
You have time. Meaning don't use it, but pass through time in patience, waiting for something to come. Prepare for its arrival. Don't rush to meet it. Be a conduit. I believed him. I felt this to be true. Some people might consider that passivity but I did not. I considered it living.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
ec834ed
|
Whimsy is the answer to tears.
|
|
sadness
reactions
tears
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
ce9ff63
|
All the talk of regret. They make you form your life around one thing, the thing you did, and you have to grow yourself from what cannot be undone: they want you to make something from nothing. They make you hate them and yourself. They make it seem that they are the world, and you've betrayed it, them, but the world is so much bigger. The lie of regret and of life gone off the rails. What rails. The life is the rails. It is its own rails a..
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
f61fd63
|
I can only know myself, if I can know anyone. I can only judge me.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
cc2e3d3
|
change was such an elusive thing. A man could say every day that he wanted to change his life, was going to change it, and every day the lament became merely a part of the life he was already living, so that the esire for change was in fact a kind of stasis that allowed the unchanged life to continue, because at least the man knew to disapprove of it, which reassured him not all was lost.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
9499915
|
change was such an elusive thing. A man could say every day that he wanted to change his life, was going to change it, and every day the lament became merely a part of the life he was already living, so that the desire for change was in fact a kind of stasis that allowed the unchanged life to continue, because at least the man knew to disapprove of it, which reassured him not all was lost.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
a187835
|
Charles Bukowski's Factotum
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
b99d2cb
|
Jesus' Son by Denis Johnson.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
cb17282
|
I thought of the girl in the photo in Ronnie's studio, the one on layaway. She was probably waiting for him this very moment, somewhere downtown. Checking the clock, applying lipstick, concentrating herself into an arrow pointed at Ronnie. Doing the various things women did when they had to wait for something they wanted.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
f237d59
|
S]ympathy for people, without any sympathy for what caused their circumstances, [is] not real sympathy but sentimentality.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
8ccb595
|
We were in separate realities, fast and slow. There is no fixed reality, only objects in contrast.
|
|
objectivity
objects
subjectivity
motion
speed
observation
relativity
perception
|
Rachel Kushner |
|
854030b
|
Change was such an elusive thing. A man could say every day that he wanted to change his life, was going to change it, and every day the lament became merely a part of the life he was already living, so that the desire for change was in fact a kind of stasis that allowed the unchanged life to continue, because at least the man knew to disapprove of it, which reassured him not all was lost.
|
|
|
Rachel Kushner |