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da75bdb
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Both men and women remain in dysfunctional, loveless relationships when it is materially opportune.
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men
women
relationship
loveless
security
safety
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Bell Hooks |
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d674311
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Black progressives suffered major disillusionment with white progressives when our experiences of working with them revealed that they could want to be with us (even to be our sexual partners) without divesting of white supremacist thinking about blackness. We saw that they were often unable to let go the idea that whites are somehow better, smarter, more likely to be intellectuals, and even that they were kinder than black folks.
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bell hooks |
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1c8d470
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Being loving does not mean we will not be betrayed. Love helps up face betrayal without losing heart. And it renews our spirit so we can love again.
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bell hooks |
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a4d183c
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education was about the practice of freedom.
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bell hooks |
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223abe9
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Often their rage erupts because they believe that all ways of looking that highlight difference subvert the liberal belief in a universal subjectivity (we are all just people) that they think will make racism disappear. They have a deep emotional investment in the myth of sameness even as their actions reflect the primacy of whiteness as a sign informing who they are and how they think.
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bell hooks |
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87ae131
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What the world needs now is liberated men who have the qualities Silverstein cites, men who are 'empathetic and strong, autonomous and connected, responsible to self, to family and friends, to society, and capable of understanding how those responsibilities are, ultimately, inseparable.' Men need feminist thinking. It it the theory that supports their spiritual evolution and their shift away from the patriarchal model. Patriarchy is destroy..
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man
men
feminism
feminist
good-man
feminist-quotes
maleness
spiritual-growth
male
patriarchy
masculinity
manhood
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bell hooks |
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4cd603c
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Men come to sex hoping that it will provide them with all of the emotional satisfaction that would have come from love. Most men think that sex will provide them with a sense of being alive, connected, that sex will offer closeness, intimacy, pleasure. And more often than not sex simply does not deliver the goods. This fact does not lead men to cease obsessing about sex; it intensifies their lust and their longing.
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sex
feminism
feminist
love
feminist-quotes
porn
masculinity
lust
sexuality
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bell hooks |
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abbe93e
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Many women cannot hear male pain about love because it sounds like an indictment of female failure.
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bell hooks |
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096ea1b
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I think the truth is that finding ourselves brings more excitement and well-being than anything romance has to offer, and somewhere we know that.
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literature
feminism
communion
self-love
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bell hooks |
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fc29840
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For years I lived my life suspended, trapped by the past, unable to move into the future. Like every wounded child I just wanted to turn back time and be in that paradise again, in that moment of remembered rapture where I felt loved, where I felt a sense of belonging. We can never go back. I know that now. We can go forward .We can find the love our hearts long for, but not until we let go grief about the love we lost long ago, when we wer..
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past
love
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bell hooks |
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b34bf06
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Describing our romantic longings in 'Life preserves,' therapist Harriet Lerner shares that most people want a partner 'who is mature and intelligent, loyal and trustworthy, loving and attentive, sensitive and open, kind and nurturant, competent and responsible.' No matter the intensity of this desire, she concludes: 'Few of us evaluate a prospective partner with the same objectivity and clarity that we might use to select a household applia..
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love-quotes
romance
love
finding-love
pick-up-line
picky
romantic-partner
love-at-first-sight
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bell hooks |
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caffaa2
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All awakening to love is spiritual awakening
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bell hooks |
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66900b3
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see first-hand the ways that democratic education is being undermined as the interests of big business and corporate capitalism encourage students to see education solely as a means to achieve material success. Such thinking makes acquiring information more important than gaining knowledge or learning how to think critically.
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Bell Hooks |
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a465e24
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Patriarchal hip-hop ushered in a world where black males could declare that they were "keeping it real" when what they were really doing was taking the dead patriarchal protest of the black power movement and rearticulating it in forms that, though entertaining, had for the most part no transformative power, no ability to intervene on the politics of domination, and turn the real lives of black men around."
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identity
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bell hooks |
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81993e0
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Indeed, all the great movements for social justice in our society have strongly emphasized a love ethic.
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Bell Hooks |
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bb70cd6
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A shift in class values occurs in black life when integration comes and with it the idea that money is the primary marker of individual success, not how one acquires money. Adopting that worldview changed the dynamics of work in black communities. Black men who could show they had money (no matter how they acquired it) could be among the powerful. It was this thinking that allowed hustlers in black communities to be seen as just as hardwork..
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bell hooks |
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c9a1829
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Trusting that another person always intends your good, having a core foundation of loving practice, cannot exist within a context of deception.
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Bell Hooks |
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fdff6da
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Naming oppressive realities, in and of itself, has not brought about the kinds of changes for oppressed groups that it can for more privileged groups, who command a different quality of attention.
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bell hooks |
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081c220
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When we leave the realm of cinema, it is obvious that the dynamics of white supremacist capitalist patriarchy---which has historically represented black females as "undesirable mates" even if they are desirable sex objects, and so rendered it socially unacceptable for powerful white males to seek committed relationships with black women---continue to inform the nature of romantic partnership in our society. What would happen to the future..
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feminism-woman-submission
cinema
white-privilege
patriarchy
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Bell Hooks |
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4a9c8c4
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Anger prevents love and isolates the one who is angry. It is an attempt, often successful, to push away what is most longed for--companionship and understanding. It is a denial of the humanness of others, as well as a denial of your own humanness. Anger is the agony of believing that you are not capable of being understood, and that you are not worthy of being understood. It is a wall that separates you from others as effectively as if it w..
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bell hooks |
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4fa96a4
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To love somebody is not just a strong feeling - it's a decision, it's a judgement, it's a promise.
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bell hooks |
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002ce80
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Whenever women thinkers, especially advocates of feminism, speak about the widespread problem of male violence, folks are eager to stand up and make the point that most men are not violent. They refuse to acknowledge that masses of boys and men have been programmed from birth on to believe that at some point they must be violent, whether psychologically or physically, to prove that they are men.
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Bell Hooks |
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f5b4f0f
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Embracing love ethic means that we utilize all dimensions of love-- "care, commitment, trust, responsibility, respect and knowledge"-- in our everyday lives."
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bell hooks |
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412ac71
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Radical feminist work around the world daily strengthens political solidarity between women beyond the boundaries of race/ethnicity and nationality. Mainstream mass media rarely calls attention to these positive interventions. In Hatreds: Radicalized and Sexualized Conflicts in the 21st Century, Zillah Eisenstein shares the insight: Feminism(s) as transnational - imagined as the rejection of false race/gender borders and falsely constructed..
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bell hooks |
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dce8b82
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A genuine feminist politics always brings us from bondage to freedom, from lovelessness to loving... There can be no love without justice.
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bell hooks |
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6dea875
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Failure to examine the victimization of men keeps us from understanding maleness, from uncovering the space of connection that might lead more men to seek feminist transformation.
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bell hooks |
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178a4e8
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Boys need healthy self-esteem. They need love. And a wise and loving feminist politics can provide the only foundation to save the lives of male children. Patriarchy will not heal them. If that were so they would all be well.
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Bell Hooks |
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a9fc4b6
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Usually, fundamentalists, be they Christian, Muslim, or any faith, shape and interpret religious thought to make it conform to and legitimize a conservative status quo. Fundamentalist thinkers use religion to justify supporting imperialism, militarism, sexism, racism, homophobia. They deny the unifying message of love that is at the heart of every major religious tradition.
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spirituality
religion
spiritual
religious
christianity-faith
muslim
fundamentalism
fundamentalists
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bell hooks |
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5781b71
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Love empowers us to live fully and die well. Death becomes, then, not an end to life but a part of living.
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bell hooks |
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2e319d3
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Before contemporary feminist movement was less than 10 years old, feminist thinkers began to talk about the way in which patriarchy was harmful to men. Without changing our fierce critique of male domination feminist politics expanded to include the recognition that patriarchy stripped men of certain rights, imposing on them a sexist masculine identity.
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Bell Hooks |
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ad2212b
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When men lie to women, presenting a false self, the terrible price they pay to maintain "power over" us is the loss of their capacity to give and receive love."
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bell hooks |
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a255318
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It is this dependency that became, and is, the breeding ground for abuses of power.
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dependency
power
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Bell Hooks |
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bdd7390
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Most people have no understanding of the myriad ways feminism has positively changed all our lives. Sharing feminist thought and practice sustains feminist movement. Feminist knowledge is for everybody.
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Bell Hooks |
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dd11096
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We need to theorize the meaning of beauty in our lives so that we can educate for critical consciousness, talking through the issues: how we acquire and spend money, how we feel about beauty, what the place of beauty is in our lives when we lack material privilege and even basic resources for living, the meaning and significance of luxury, and the politics of envy.
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bell hooks |
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9baae5d
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Love is profoundly political. Our deepest revolution will come when we understand this truth.
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love
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bell hooks |
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bbbe4ce
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I am often struck by the dangerous narcissism fostered by spiritual rhetoric that pays so much attention to individual self-improvement and so little to the practice of love within the context of community.
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Bell Hooks |
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8a1a127
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As long as females take up the banner of feminist politics without addressing and transforming their own sexism, ultimately the movement will be undermined.
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bell hooks |
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3be08d2
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An overwhelming majority of us come from dysfunctional families in which we were taught we were not okay, where we were shamed, verbally and/or physically abused, and emotionally neglected even as (we) were taught to believe that we were loved.
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love
all-about-love
bell-hooks
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bell hooks |
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1778cf7
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black identities are diverse and complex...
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bell hooks |
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4970020
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Profound changes in the way we think and act must take place if we are to create a loving culture.
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Bell Hooks |
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b43f4e9
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This fear of maleness that they inspire estranges men from every female in their lives to greater or lesser degrees, and men feel the loss. Ultimately, one of the emotional costs of allegiance to patriarchy is to be seen as unworthy of trust.
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men
feminism
feminist
trust
feminist-quotes
trustworthy
patriarchy
masculinity
manhood
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bell hooks |
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55a6ec0
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For too long the term domestic violence has been used as a "soft" term which suggests it emerges in an intimate context that is private and somehow less threatening, less brutal, than the violence that takes place outside the home. This is not so, since more women are beaten and murdered in the home than on the outside."
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bell hooks |
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e49ca0f
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Shame about being hurt often has its origin in childhood. And it is then that many of us first learn that it is a virtue to be silent about pain. ... As more people have found the courage to break through shame and speak about woundedness in their lives, we are now subjected to a mean-spirited cultural response, where all talk of woundedness is mocked. The belittling of anyone's attempt to make a context within which they were wounded, were..
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bell hooks |
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55dd8fd
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While it is positive for young black males and females to learn discipline and self-responsibility, those attitudes, values, and habits of being can be taught with pedagogical strategies that are liberatory, that do not rely on coercive control and punishment to reinforce positive behavior.
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bell hooks |