|
a63f38d
|
To be loving is to be open to grief, to be touched by sorrow, even sorrow that is unending.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
36a01a4
|
At times women find it difficult to hear what men have to say when what they tell us does not conform to our fantasies of who they are or who we want them to be.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
933c928
|
Self-acceptance is hard for many of us. There is a voice inside that is constantly judging, first ourselves and then others.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
be58f3d
|
A male who has divested of male privilege, who has embraced feminist politics, is a worthy comrade in struggle, in no way a threat to feminism, whereas a female who remains wedded to sexist thinking and behavior infiltrating feminist movement is a dangerous threat.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
6113acd
|
Spirituality and spiritual life gives us the strength to love.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
6bb8b39
|
Through the practice of compassion and forgiveness, I was able to sustain my appreciation for her work and cope with the grief and disappointment I felt about the loss of this relationship. Practicing compassion enabled me to understand why she might have acted as she did and to forgive her. Forgiving means that I am able to see her as a member of my community still, one who has a place in my heart should she wish to claim it.
|
|
feminism
compassion
forgiveness
|
bell hooks |
|
770c4e1
|
I knew that I wanted to follow their example and become a teacher who would help students become self-directed learners.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
702146e
|
Who we are as African-Americans, as black folks in the diaspora, our cultural destiny, has been shaped by both the enslaved and the free.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
b1e1b73
|
The feeling that I've done something wrong, that I really don't know what it is, that there's something terribly wrong with my very being, leads to a sense of utter hopelessness. This hopelessness is the deepest cut of the mystified state. It means there is no possibility for me as I am; there is no way I can matter or be worthy of anyone's love as long as I remain myself. I must find a way to be someone else--someone who is lovable. Someon..
|
|
patriarchy
|
bell hooks |
|
ee30c10
|
There seems to be a fear that if men are raised to be people of integrity, people who can love, they will be unable to be forceful and act violently if needed.... We see that females that are raised with the traits any person of integrity embodies can act with tenderness, with assertiveness, and with aggression if and when aggression is needed.
|
|
integrity
men
feminism
feminist
good-men
feminist-quotes
maleness
integrity-quotes
male
patriarchy
masculinity
manhood
|
bell hooks |
|
8e7d121
|
The choice to love is a choice to connect--- to find ourselves in the other.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
1af270a
|
We see in movies, people are represented as being in love who never talk with one another, who fall into bed without ever discussing their bodies, their sexual needs, their likes and dislikes. [...] the message is [...] that ignorance gives love its erotic and transgressive edge. These messages are often brought to us by profiteering producers who have no clue about the art of loving. [...] They do not know how to genuinely portray loving i..
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
dcd9731
|
I learned that we may meet a true love and that our lives may be transformed by such an encounter even when it does not lead to sexual pleasure, committed bonding, or even sustained contact. The myth of true love-that fairy-tale vision of two souls who meet, join, and live happily ever thereafter-is the stuff of childhood fantasy. Yet many of us, female and male, carry these fantasies into adulthood and are unable to cope with the reality o..
|
|
fairy-tales
love-quotes
true-love
love
love-is-hard
love-at-first-sight
|
bell hooks |
|
6d568b8
|
In truth, true love is all about work.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
7d1267c
|
Females of all ages acted as though concern for or rage at male domination or gender equality was all that was needed to make one a "feminist." Without confronting internalized sexism women who picked up the feminist banner often betrayed the cause in their interactions with other women."
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
65a682c
|
When feminists acknowledge in one breath that black women are victimized and in the same breath emphasize their strength, they imply that though black women are oppressed they manage to circumvent the damaging impact of oppression by being strong--and that is simply not the case. Usually, when people talk about the "strength" of black women they are referring to the way in which they perceive black women coping with oppression. They ignore ..
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
6fb0648
|
Wisely, Baldwin insisted that we are always more than our pain. Not only did he believe in our capacity to love, he felt black people were uniquely situated to risk loving because we had suffered.
|
|
love
james-baldwin
|
bell hooks |
|
5e0eb2e
|
If we give our children sound self-love, they will be able to deal with whatever life puts before them.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
2a11413
|
Psychological patriarchy is a "dance of contempt," a perverse form of connection that replaces true intimacy with complex, covert layers of dominance and submission, collusion and manipulation. It is the unacknowledged paradigm of relationships that has suffused Western civilization generation after generation, deforming both sexes, and destroying the passionate bond between them."
|
|
relationships
|
bell hooks |
|
84bcaeb
|
No significant body of feminist writing addresses boys directly, letting them know how they can construct an identity that is not rooted in sexism. There is no body of feminist children's literature that can serve as an alternative to patriarchal perspectives, which abound in the world of children's books.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
2ad21a4
|
No matter that information abounds that lets the public know that gay males come from two-parent homes and can be macho and women-hating, misguided assumptions about what makes a male gay still flourish. Every day boys who express feelings are psychologically terrorized, and in extreme cases brutally beaten, by parents who fear that a man of feeling must be homosexual. Gay men share with straight men the same notions about acceptable mascul..
|
|
violence
feminism
feelings
feminist
emotional-men
feelings-and-emotions
gay-teens
gay-men
emotions
masculinity
gay
|
bell hooks |
|
aeabf9f
|
Culture of domination rely on the cultivation of fear as a way to ensure obedience. In our society we make much of love and say little about fear. Yet we are all terribly afraid most of the time. [...] Yet we do not question why we live in states of extreme anxiety and dread. [...] Fear promotes the desire for separation, the desire not to be known. When we are taught that safety lies with sameness, then difference will appear as a threat. ..
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
351cab7
|
Cultures of domination rely on the cultivation of fear as a way to ensure obedience. In our society we make much of love and say little about fear. Yet we are all terribly afraid most of the time. As a culture we are obsessed with the notion of safety. Yet we do not question why we live in states of extreme anxiety and dread. Fear is the primary force upholding systems of domination. It promotes the desire for separation, the desire not to ..
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
165ce4e
|
We have power as consumers. We can exercise that power all the time by not choosing to invest time, energy or funds to support the production of mass media images that do not reflect life-enhancing values, that undermine a love ethic.
|
|
humanity
change
optimism
love
consummerism
generosity
society
principles
values
|
bell hooks |
|
b786224
|
Romantic love as most people understand it in patriarchal culture makes one unaware, renders one powerless and out of control. Feminist thinkers called attention to the way this notion of love served the interests of patriarchal men and women. It supported the notion that one could do anything in the name of love: beat people, restrict their movements, even kill them and call it a "crime of passion," plead, "I love her so much i had to kill..
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
fda1282
|
The search for love continued even in the face of great odds.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
c89df44
|
I choose to re-appropriate the term "feminism", to focus on the fact that to be "feminist" in any authentic sense of the term is to want for all people, female and male, liberation from sexist role patterns, domination, and oppression."
|
|
|
Bell Hooks |
|
8da226d
|
By championing hedonistic consumerism and encouraging individuals of all classes to believe that ownership of a particular object mediated the realities of class, mass media created a new image of the rich.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
c70a4e4
|
Advancing the notion that there can be many "feminisms" has served the conservative and liberal political interests of women seeking status and privileged class power who were among the first group to use the term "power feminists." They also were the group that began to suggest that one could be feminist and anti-abortion. This another misguided notion. Granting women the civil right to have control over our bodies is a basic feminist prin..
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
df92c8c
|
That foundation rested on our critique of what we then called 'the enemy within,' referring to our internalized sexism. We all knew firsthand that we had been socialized as females by patriarchal thinking to see ourselves as inferior to men, to see ourselves as always and only in competition with one another for patriarchal approval, to look upon each other with jealousy, fear, and hatred. Sexist thinking made us judge each other without co..
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
1ee21f4
|
In the dominator model the pursuit of external power, the ability to manipulate and control others, is what matters most. When culture is based on a dominator model, not only will it be violent but it will frame all relationships as power struggles.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
7bf8f8a
|
In our nation masses of people are concerned about violence but resolutely refuse to link that violence to patriarchal thinking or male domination. Feminist thinking offers a solution. And it is up to us to make that solution available to everyone.
|
|
|
Bell Hooks |
|
3815075
|
The idealized woman becomes property, symbol, and ornament; she is stripped of her essential human qualities. The devalued woman becomes a different kind of object; she is the spittoon in which men release their negative anti-woman feelings.
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
98e753a
|
nature as chameleon
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
59ead9c
|
time is aboriginal eternal
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
4233517
|
spirits bring contentment for a time carry us closer to the sacred moving through bitterness our yearning to hold on to moments of ecstasy where we imagine we hear clearly destiny calling
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
ed24a79
|
they have the right to fall when life comes to an end to move in harmony with fate
|
|
|
bell hooks |
|
7486b8b
|
Creation spirituality replaced a patriarchal spirituality rooted in notions of fall and redemption.
|
|
|
Bell hooks |
|
6fd6543
|
Black women control the world. We are through being discriminated against.
|
|
|
Bell hooks |
|
37235a1
|
People with healthy self-esteem do not need to create pretend identities.
|
|
|
Bell hooks |