|
21d7770
|
I]t was designed to operate with minimal assistance from humans, who were without exception the moving part most likely to fail.
|
|
weak-link
|
John Scalzi |
|
3bc9942
|
Szilard looked over at Robbins. "Is it true?" he said. "Which part, sir?" Robbins said. "That you don't like General Mattson," Szilard said. "He can take some getting used to, sir," Robbins said. "By which he means I'm an asshole,"
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
d996674
|
He was determined to be the most touristy tourist who had ever touristed,
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
63c1069
|
We're in the wrong universe for fair.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
0f45960
|
I've met a lot of people in the diplomatic corps who were in love with the sound of their own voice, but this guy. He and his voice should just get a room.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
6648adf
|
Oh, God," I said. "Thank you so very much for the mental image of Dad as a teenage sack of hormones. That's the sort of image that takes therapy to get rid of."
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
e442085
|
Stop whining like a fucking child." "You could have just said, 'I need your help.'" "All right. I need your help. Stop whining like a fucking child." "That's not better."
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
73413ce
|
I don't think food safety laws are going to protect you from a third carnitas burrito," Hanson said. "That's not about food safety. It's about pork fat overload."
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
44f863e
|
And when I say "exploded" I mean "interacted catastrophically with the topography of space/time in ways we're not entirely able to explain," but "explode" gets the gist of it, particularly with regard to what would happen to a human caught in it."
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
0b736e2
|
Danielle Lowen: How are you? I am fine. The group that destroyed Earth Station and made it look like the Colonial Union did it is now planning to nuke the surface of your planet until it glows, and frame the Conclave for it. Hope you are well. Looking forward to rescuing you in space again soon. Your friend, Harry Wilson.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
e357203
|
There's nothing like sharing menarche with a billion hermaphrodites. I think it was everyone's first time.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
6d9ae68
|
I do not mind when you tell me what you want and put that first instead of last.
|
|
love
|
John Scalzi |
|
8586af6
|
We buy time where we may." "You bought yourself time," Oi agreed. "I don't think it's of very good quality."
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
07bc95f
|
something funny, Lord Marce?" asked a young woman, standing in front of a desk. She was wearing imperial green. This was clearly the emperox, and equally clearly he'd just blown his entrance. He bowed. "I'm sorry, Your Majesty," he said. "I was surprised by your office." "How so?" "I ... well. Ma'am. It looks like a museum exploded inside of it." Obelees Atek sucked in her breath and apparently was now waiting for the emperox to sentence hi..
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
8dcc7b5
|
Is it painful?" the groundskeeper asked. "I am asking for science."
|
|
pain
science
science-fiction
|
John Scalzi |
|
ba8836b
|
Because every time I think of starships skipping across the galaxy, I imagine Albert Einstein in a policeman's uniform, writing up a ticket.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
66f8951
|
Well, I'm sorry my telling the truth about the stupid things you do is inconvenient for you,
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
5652459
|
There's a saying: "May you live in interesting times." To begin, it's a curse. "Interesting" in this case uniformly means "Oh god, death is raining down upon us and we shall all perish wailing and possibly on fire." If someone wanted to say something nice to you, they wouldn't tell you to live in "interesting" times. They would say something like, "I wish you eternal happiness" or "May you have peace" or "Live long and prosper" and so on. T..
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
100efdf
|
You've got yourself a cloned body here, Jim.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
1583186
|
But I have always found that there's an inverse relationship between the number of people in a room and the amount of useful work that can be done.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
443f756
|
Anyone can be a prophet. You just have to say that what you're talking about is a reflection of God. Or of the gods. Or of some divine spirit. However you want to put it. Whether those things come true isn't one way or another about it.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
5978d86
|
I thought this was a matter of some urgency, Harry." "It is," I said. "But I fell from the sky today. I could use a couple of waffles."
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
260f94d
|
When I was twelve, my appendix burst, and as they were wheeling my ass into the operating room, I asked the doctor, "How will this affect my piano playing?" and he said, "Don't worry, you'll still be able to play the piano," and I said, "Wow! I wasn't able to before!" And then they gassed me."
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
25a1f71
|
What was your job back on Earth? I've always been curious. I taught eighth-grade math in Tallahassee. Huh, I said. That's not what I expected. Are you kidding? Powell said back. You try teaching algebra to a bunch of little shitheads for thirty-eight years straight. The way I figure it I've got about another decade before my rage from that gets entirely burned up.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
89a1c58
|
Yes, death by away team. Very effective on this ship," Jenkins said."
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
13b590e
|
One of Harvey's guiding lights in terms of strategies was simplicity; all things being equal, Harvey preferred the course of action that let him get into the middle of things and then just buckle down.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
6f4f886
|
Hide' isn't a word we like to use," Cassaway said. "'Perform alternative tasks' is the preferred term."
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
100e1f2
|
Part of me was once someone you loved--she sent. I think that part of me wants to be loved by you again, and wants me to love you as well. I can't be her. I can just be me. But I think you could love me if you wanted to. I want you to. Come to me when you can. I'll be here.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
1007482
|
He reached over, took the second cookie, and offered it to Robbins. "Here," he said. "I saw you coveting it." Robbins stared at the cookie, then looked around. "I can't take that," he said. "Sure you can," Szilard said. "I'm not supposed to eat anything here," Robbins said. "So what?" Szilard said. "Screw 'em. It's a ridiculous tradition and you know it. So break it. Take the cookie." Robbins took the cookie and stared at it glumly. "Oh, go..
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
db123f6
|
And so we learn how simple it is to change the history of the universe," Sorvalh said. "All you need is for every other thing to have gone so horribly wrong"
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
94b0835
|
How many people volunteer for an army and then claim conscientious objector status?
|
|
people
conscientious
objector
claim
status
volunteer
|
John Scalzi |
|
0d21647
|
This brings me back to my question about my karma," Wilson said. "You probably set kittens on fire," Schmidt said. "And the rest of us were probably there with you, with skewers."
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
022089f
|
I don't care whether I really exist or don't, whether I'm real or fictional. What I want right now is to be the person who decides my own fate. That's something I can work on. It's what I'm working on now.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
1c47f99
|
If there's one thing that distinguishes the human species, it is a pathological need to stay connected. The fact your people will interrupt sex to answer your communicators is a scandal across the entire Common Confederation.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
5ad3bf0
|
A fourth part of his brain was saying, This is the part where you run and scream a lot. He was listening to the fourth part.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
6f8fb9b
|
Now if you'll excuse me, gentlemen, I need to play Russian roulette with our planet's future with the bullet you've so thoughtfully provided. I hope you don't mind if I don't see you out.
|
|
|
John Scalzi |
|
fa6e232
|
I can't believe you just quoted a Steve Miller tune to the leader of an alien race," Van Doren, standing next to me, muttered under his breath. "Shut up," I muttered back. "It worked."
|
|
steve-miller
|
John Scalzi |