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a7413ba
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Kraft was a skinny, harmless kid from Pennsylvania who wanted only to be liked, and was destined to be disappointed in even so humble and degrading an ambition. Instead, of being liked, he was dead, a bleeding cinder on the barbarous pile whom nobody had heard in those last precious moments while the plane with one wing plummeted.
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Joseph Heller |
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365ef31
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All over the world, boys on every side of bomb line were laying down their lives for what they had been told was their country, and no one seemed to mind, least of all the boys who were laying down their young lives.
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Joseph Heller |
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a47328c
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It was possible that there were other vus of which he had never heard and that one of these other vus would explain succinctly the baffling phenomenon of which he had been both a witness and a part; it was even possible that none of what he thought had taken place, really had taken place, and that he was dealing with an aberration of memory rather than of perception, that he never really had thought he had seen what he now thought he once d..
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Joseph Heller |
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e112960
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It's a real problem to decide whether it's more boring to do something boring than to pass along everything boring that comes in to somebody else and then have nothing to do at all.
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Joseph Heller |
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342c525
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Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not after you
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Joseph Heller |
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c9a0625
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America is not going to be destroyed " he shouted passionately. "Never?" prodded the old man softly. "Well..." Nately faltered.
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Joseph Heller |
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df5ab74
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Only Hungry Joe had something better to do each time he finished his missions. He had screaming nightmares and won fist fights with Huple's cat.
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Joseph Heller |
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566f2d7
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But Yossarian knew he was right, because, as he explained to Clevinger, to the best of his knowledge he had never been wrong.
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Joseph Heller |
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a105cb7
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Colonel Cathcart stopped in his tracks. "What atheists?" he bellowed defensively, his whole manner changing in a flash to one of virtuous and belligerent denial. "There are no atheists in my outfit! Atheism is against the law, isn't it?" "No, sir." "It isn't?" The colonel was surprised. "Then it's un-American, isn't it?" "I'm not sure, sir," answered the chaplain. "Well, I am!" the colonel declared. "I'm not going to disrupt our religious s..
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Joseph Heller |
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faa28f9
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Dear Mrs., Mr., Miss, or Mr. and Mrs. Daneeka: Words cannot express the deep personal grief I experienced when your husband, son, father, or brother was killed, wounded, or reported missing in action.
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Joseph Heller |
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ab02eb3
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Of course you're dying. We're all dying. Where the devil else do you think you're heading?
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Joseph Heller |
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a22ec65
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That's some catch, that Catch-22," he observed. It's the best there is," Doc Daneeka agreed."
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Joseph Heller |
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09b4f38
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I lost my balls! Aarfy, I lost my balls!
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Joseph Heller |
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9b5b359
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Chief White Halfoat:] Racial prejudice is a terrible thing, Yossarian. It really is. It's a terrible thing to treat a decent, loyal Indian like a nigger, kike, wop, or spic.
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racism
indian
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Joseph Heller |
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bc8bccb
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That's some catch, that Catch-22,' he observed. 'It's the best there is,' Doc Daneeka agreed. Yossarian saw it clearly in all its spinning reasonableness. There was an elliptical precision about its perfect pairs of parts that was graceful and shocking, like good modern art, and at times Yossarian wasn't quite sure that he saw it at all, just the way he was never quite sure about good modern art...
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Joseph Heller |
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bf66849
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Last night in the latrine. Didn't you whisper that we couldn't punish you to that other dirty son of a bitch we don't like? What's his name?" "Yossarian, sir," Lieutenant Scheisskopf said. "Yes, Yossarian. That's right. Yossarian. Yossarian? Is that his name? Yossarian? What the hell kind of a name is Yossarian?" Lieutenant Scheisskopf had the facts at his finger tips. "It's Yossarian's name, sir," he explained."
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Joseph Heller |
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0e182e7
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There were usually not nearly as many sick people inside the hospital as Yossarian saw outside the hospital, and there were generally fewer people inside the hospital who were seriously sick. There was a much lower death rate inside the hospital than outside the hospital, and a much healthier death rate. Few people died unnecessarily. People knew a lot more about dying inside the hospital and made a much neater job of it. They couldn't domi..
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war
disease
health
hospital
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Joseph Heller |
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ab31719
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I used to think it was immoral to be unhappy.
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Joseph Heller |
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75f3793
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The knife came down, missing him by inches, and he took off.
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Joseph Heller |
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6ffbc26
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symptoms: an unreasonable belief that everyone around him was crazy, a homicidal impulse to machine-gun strangers, retrospective falsification, an unfounded suspicion that people hated him and were conspiring to kill him.
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Joseph Heller |
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e81b7b7
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Four times during the first six days they were assembled and briefed and then sent back. Once, they took off and were flying in formation when the control tower summoned them down. The more it rained, the worse they suffered. The worse they suffered, the more they prayed that it would continue raining. All through the night, men looked at the sky and were saddened by the stars. All through the day, they looked at the bomb line on the big, w..
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war
bologna
yossarian
catch-22
prayer
funny
inspiration
humor
hope
rational
meditation
superstition
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Joseph Heller |
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4341bd3
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Just for once I'd like to see all these things sort of straightened out, with each person getting exactly what he deserves. It might give me some confidence in this universe.
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Joseph Heller |
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88c6676
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Oh, they're there all right," Orr had assured him about the flies in Appleby's eyes after Yossarian's fist fight in the officers' club, "although he probably doesn't even know it. That's why he can't see things as they really are." "How come he doesn't know it?" inquired Yossarian. "Because he's got flies in his eyes," Orr explained with exaggerated patience. "How can he see he's got flies in his eyes if he's got flies in his eyes?"
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Joseph Heller |
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5cac2fd
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i know at last what i want to be when i grow up. when i grow up i want to be a little boy.
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Joseph Heller |
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16b64c7
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As far back as Yossarian could recall, he explained to Clevinger with a patient smile, somebody was always hatching a plot to kill him. There were people who cared for him and people who didn't, and those who hated him were out to get him. They hated him because he was Assyrian. But they couldn't touch him, he told Clevinger, because he had a sound mind in a pure body and was as strong as an ox. They couldn't touch him because he was Tarzan..
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yossarian
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Joseph Heller |
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12adcc3
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Victory gave us such insane delusions of grandeur that we helped start a world war we hadn't a chance of winning. But now that we are losing again, everything has taken a turn for the better, and we will certainly come out on top again if we succeed in being defeated.
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Joseph Heller |
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85c73f1
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I really do admire you a bit. You're an intelligent person of great moral character who has taken a very courageous stand. I'm an intelligent person with no moral character at all, so I'm in an ideal position to appreciate it." - Colonel Korn"
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Joseph Heller |
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1ee9c23
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Darling, we're going to have a baby again,' she would say to her husband. I haven't the time,' Lieutenant Scheisskopf would grumble petulantly. 'Don't you know there's a parade going on?
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Joseph Heller |
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ae50903
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I'm a regular supra man
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Joseph Heller |
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527b148
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Catch-22 says they have the right to do anything we can't stop them from doing.
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Joseph Heller |
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26d89d5
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Impressionable men in the squadron like Dobbs and Captain Flume were so deeply disturbed by Hungry Joe's shrieking nightmares that they woudl begin to have shrieking nightmares of their own, and the piercing obscenities they flung into the air every night from their separate places in the squadron rang against each other in the darkness romantically like the mating calls of songbirds with filthy minds.
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Joseph Heller |
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5a418d3
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Yossarian marveled that children could suffer such barbaric sacrifice without evincing the slightest hint of fear or pain. He took for granted that they did submit so stoically. If not, he reasoned, the custom would certainly have died, for no craving for wealth or immortality could be so great, he felt, as to subsist on the sorrow of children.
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Joseph Heller |
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c678770
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The maid in the lime-color panties... She had a plain broad face and was the most virtuous woman alive: she laid for EVERYBODY, regardless of race, creed, color or place of national origin, donating herself sociably as an act of hospitality, procrastinating not even for the moment it might take to discard the cloth or broom or dust mop she was clutching at the time she was grabbed. Her allure stemmed from her accessibility; like Mt. Everest..
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Joseph Heller |
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9d00502
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it was neither possible nor necessary to educate people who never questioned anything.
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Joseph Heller |
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b312ddf
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Politically, he was a humanitarian who did know right from left and was trapped uncomfortably between the two. He was constantly defending his Communist friends to his right-wing enemies and his right-wing friends to his Communist enemies, and he was thoroughly detested by both groups, who never defended him to anyone because they thought he was a dope.
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humanitarianism
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Joseph Heller |
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f22e7f2
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He was a spry, suave and very precise general who knew the circumference of the equator and always wrote "enhanced" when he meant "increased." He was a prick."
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Joseph Heller |
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d4d119f
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They couldn't keep Death out, but while she was in she had to act like a lady.
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proper-etiquette
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Joseph Heller |
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6014ee3
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And don't tell me God works in mysterious ways," Yossarian continued, hurtling on over her objection. "There's nothing so mysterious about it. He's not working at all. He's playing. Or else He's forgotten all about us. That's the kind of God you people talk about - a country bumpkin, a clumsy, bungling, brainless, conceited, uncouth hayseed." --
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Joseph Heller |
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5b55fd3
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There are outrages and there are outrages, and some are more outrageous than others. Mankind is resilient: the atrocities that horrified us a week ago become acceptable tomorrow. The Death of Socrates had no effect upon the history of Athens. If anything, the reputation of the city has been improved by it. The death of no person is as important to the future as the literature about it. You will learn nothing from history that can be applied..
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Joseph Heller |
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fe181a3
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She destroyed egos by the score and made men hate themselves in the morning by the way she found them, used them, and tossed them aside.
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Joseph Heller |
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71edbf1
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People have a right to do anything that's not forbidden by law, and there's no law against lying to you.
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Joseph Heller |
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5c52bcc
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His response to them [women] as sexual beings was one of frenzied worship and idolatry. They were lovely, satisfying, maddening manifestations of the miraculous, instruments of pleasure too powerful to be measured, too keen to be endured, and too exquisite to be intended for employment by base, unworthy man.
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Joseph Heller |
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c1889c4
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You've been unable to adjust to the idea of war.' 'Yes, sir.' 'You have a morbid aversion to dying.
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Joseph Heller |
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35d958d
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Maybe I am senile already and people are too kind to tell me. People are not kind and would tell me. (Maybe people have told me, and I'm too senile to remember).
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Joseph Heller |