She drew herself up and crossed her arms over her chest. "So Buck can enjoy sitting in a cell contemplating how he blew up his life. That dickwad hurt two people sitting at this table. And you're worried about who'll look bad if they tell? Screw that. Dean and D.J. and Kennedy and every frat boy on this campus can all go fuck themselves. Are we sisters or not?"
Remember last fall, when you needed to be reckless, and I told you to use me? Well, now, it's time to be fearless. I can't promise that you won't be hurt again, because life can suck. And, sometimes it hurts like hell. I'm asking you now to have faith in one thing, for now: the fact that when we're alone, I'm just Reid, and you're just Dori, and we're going to love each other for the rest of our lives.
If I met you last night, and brought you back to my place, or followed you to yours, and we had sex, that's what we asked for from each other. It's what I got, and what you got. I don't know you. You don't know me. Thanks for playing, and we're done. If by some fluke anything was said at some point during this entire exchange that made me curious enough to see you again, I would. Has that happened before? A couple of times. Did it last? Cle..
He swallowed, closing his eyes and inhaling slowly. I knew he would be all rational and do-the-right-thing and he would push me away again, and I was determined not to give him that chance. But then his eyes flashed open and he said, "Fuck it," pushing me against the door, slamming his forearms on either side of my head and kissing me mmore forcefully than I'd ever been kissed"
She chews her lip, staring into my eyes. "Okay... Why did you kiss me in Austin?" I laugh softly and she frowns. "Sorry. That one's too easy." My gaze flicks to her mouth and back. "I'd wanted to kiss you ever since Quinton suggested playing spin the bottle, and by that night in your room, I'd run out of willpower to fight it."
I told him that bed-and-breakfasts have ginormous whirlpool tubs, and that I'd be willing to do unspeakably sinful things to him in it." A strangled sound came from one of the two nerdy guys behind us in line, both wearing tortured expressions and staring at Erin. We stifled laughs. Maggie sighed. "Poor Chaz. He never had a chance... he's gonna be standing in front of a bunch of people saying 'I do' someday without knowing how it happened."..
I've heard people say My heart stopped--which of course isn't possible unless you've just died--but I now understood where the perception might originate.
Who gives a shit what everyone thinks?" he said. I see now that this has long been some sort of mantra for him. I've never been that free. I want to be, and sometimes I pretend to be, but I'm not. I'm forever chained to giving a shit about what someone thinks."
I felt the threads of connection between us--fragile filaments, so easily snapped. Like the poem at shift into his side, we were craving to fit inside the other, and is melting and reshaping could be deeper, more resilient.
No importaba lo que le sucedia a alguna persona individual, la vida pasaba en otros lugares. La primera vez que Kennedy me beso, estaba a la razon de que al mismo tiempo, otras personas se separaban. Y la noche que Kennedy rompio mi corazon, en algun lugar --tal vez justo alli en mi dormitorio, otras personas se enamoraban.
You may be the only one who'll see through all my bullshit and help me try to be something more, something better." I stare at our intertwined hands. "I don't want to help you try to be anything. I want someone who's already something more. On his own. With or without me."
I opened my mouth wide one time to see if the words I was thinking would fall out, but they wouldn't. If words don't want to come out, they don't. I don't understand when people say things and then they say, I didn't mean to say that. Words don't just fall out. You have to push them out. And sometimes, you can't push them out, even if you want to.
I stare into his eyes, a slight smile pulling at my mouth, and I see myself as he sees me. I feel loved, and scared, and hopeful. I feel found. And I think, Here is the beginning of my faith. Here is my forever. Right here. Right here.
I shook to my core, my soul curving around her protectively as my mind strove to determine the logical calculation that could make her mine. I wanted to be hers as much--more--than I wanted to possess her, when I knew damned well that neither was possible.
The little kids by the water threw their hands in the air and squealed, chasing each other in circles. It was hard to believe that I'd ever been that small. That young. That happy and clueless. They had pain ahead. Heartbreak. Loss. They didn't know and I didn't want them to - but at the same time, I hated that I hadn't known. I'd taken everything for granted - my mother, my friends in Alexandria, playing hockey. I dreamed about the future ..
Even still, there's more to this complex girl, and the physical craving I feel for her is merely an index to the rest of it. I know her patience, her kindness, her inherent desire to leave the world a better place than she found it. I've felt her forgiveness, her strength, and her ability to see something good in anyone. The whole of her is overwhelming, and the fact that I may have found her only to lose her scares the hell out of me.
I'm a coward. A willing coward, complicit in my own fall. I've never told him that I love him, as if refusing to say it aloud would somehow shield us both, but it hasn't. Like an untamed, sentient thing, full of I am and yet estranged from me, my heart discerns its own truth and knows that this omission is a lie.
Why me?" I hear his answer in my head before he says it. "Don't know, honey. But there's a reason for everything." Dad pats my hand. "We'll just have to wait patiently to see what it is." As i do every time he says that or something like this, I bite back what I'd say if I could reply honestly. I don't believe there's a reason for everything, and having faith doesn't mean I'm blind. I believe people make poor choices. I believed bad things ..
You said you have faith in us. You told me to come to you when I was ready to be fearless. The truth is, I don't know if I can be fearless. I've lost myself, Reid, and I'm still so scared. But I'm ready to try. If you still want to, I'm ready.
Take this. When you're ready, I want to put it on your finger. I want you to meet my son. I want you to let me bring you into my world - because I need you there. The media crap is just PR. Piece of cake for you, trust me. There are a hundred people ready to help us nail it. Let me help you rebuild your faith, because that's who you are, and I love who you are. 'Remember last fall, when you needed to be reckless, and I told you to use me? W..