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You can accept or reject the way you are treated by other people, but until you heal the wounds of your past, you will continue to bleed. You can bandage the bleeding with food, with alcohol, with drugs, with work, with cigarettes, with sex, but eventually, it will all ooze through and stain your life. You must find the strength to open the wounds, stick your hands inside, pull out the core of the pain that is holding you in your past, the ..
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wounds
the-past
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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Remain open. There is something bigger than you know going on here.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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You have set standards for how you want to be treated and what you expect from yourself and for yourself.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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You can never love anyone to your own detriment. That is not love, that is possession, control, fear, or a combination of them all.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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Yesterday, I cried. I came home, went straight to my room, sat on the edge of my bed, kicked off my shoes, unhooked my bra, and I had myself a good cry.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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013b011
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The road of life is strewn with the bodies of promising people. People who show promise, yet lack the confidence to act. People who make promises they are unable to keep. People who promise to do tomorrow what they could do today. Promising young stars, athletes, entrepreneurs who wait for promises to come true. Promise without a goal and a plan is like a barren cow. You know what she could do if she could do it, but she can't. Turn your pr..
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inspirational
goals-in-life
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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558787c
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when you have something to do life will not allow you to move foward until you do it.
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stuck
moving-forward
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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I'd been taught not to like myself,because the people around me didn't, for whatever reason like me.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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The voice I had accepted as Divine Guidance was actually the voice of my ego leading me right into destruction.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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In the process of planning and having a wedding, I forgot there would actually be a marriage, a union of minds, bodies, souls, and issues that would come together as soon as the ceremony was over.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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90c5d74
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What is it that would make a creature as fierce, majestic and powerful as a lion is, subject itself to the intimidation of a man a whip and a chair? The lion has been taught to forget what it is.
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strength
self-esteem
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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e71ec40
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Lives fall apart when they need to be rebuilt.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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e6c630d
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Sooner or later, we must all accept the fact that in a relationship, the only person you are dealing with is yourself. Your partner does nothing more than reveal your stuff to you. Your fear! Your anger! Your pattern! Your craziness! As long as you insist on pointing the finger out there, at them, you will continue to miss out on the divine opportunity to clear your stuff. Here is a meantime tip--we love in others what we love in ourselves...
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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Their issues are not your issues.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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I now realize that lives fall apart when they need to be rebuilt. Lives fall apart when the foundation upon which they were built needs to be relaid. Lives fall apart, not because God is punishing us for what we have or have not done. Lives fall apart because they need to. They need to because they weren't built the right way in the first place.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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8e8ecca
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Life would be so much easier if, when we hit a snag in a relationship, any relationship, we would stop, address it, and move ahead smoothly. The truth is, in most cases, we could do just that. The reality is, we don't do it! We keep moving. We allow little insults to become raging angers, little arguments to become festering feuds, little pains to become deep wounds, and we keep moving. In many cases, we keep hurting. When the relationship ..
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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3a2ce84
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When you feel unprotected, unsupported and unprepared to take care of yourself, your insides will feel if you have been through a train wreck. The best way to describe this experience is that you are having a head on body collision between your wannabe and your can never be.
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inspirational
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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49aec63
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When two broken people bring their broken pieces together, chances are they will never become a whole anything.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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b35cd8e
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Acceptance means that you know, regardless of what happened, that there is something bigger than you at work. It also means you know that you are okay and that you will continue to be okay.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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3ba96ad
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When you are starting your life over, with a new sense of self, who you once were is going to challenge you. Who you once were is going to dangle old carrots, old wounds and issues, in front of your face. When that happens, you will be tempted to revert to old feelings, old patterns of thought, and old patterns of behavior.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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871a127
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God is love. Love is always present, surrounding us; guiding, growing, and teaching us. Even in the midst of total chaos, pain, and dysfunction, love is calling us to a higher experience and expression.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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bc00556
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Unworthiness always puts you in debt to anyone and everyone who shows you the slightest degree of attention or love or energy. Eventually, in this form of bankrupt relationship, your benefactors will demand or expect more than you are able or willing to give. This is the precise moment they will choose to call in the loan.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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d68b98a
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I've learned we all get exactly what we need, when we need it, in order to learn what God intends for us to know so we can be who God intends for us to be.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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7fd0dd3
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Even though there is a part of me holding on to the belief that I am now, have always been, and will always be unworthy, I am still willing to love and accept myself.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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0133d6d
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If you are a woman, you may need to forgive those whom you have loved or those who refused to love you; those who have hurt you, shamed you, and abandoned you; or those who left you scarred or wounded.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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c3fe3e1
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When your life is going downhill, it doesn't get better just because you want it to. Nor can you will it to be better. Your life will only get better when you get better.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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e8dd429
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Until and unless you know that you are enough just the way you are, you will always be driven to look for more. Knowing that you are enough is a function of consciousness. Your enough-ness develops in direct proportion to the relationship you have with your true identity. Until you wholeheartedly believe in your own worth, in spite your of accomplishments and possessions, there will be a void in your Spirit. I had more than a void. I had a ..
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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0803358
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FORGIVENESS ADDRESSES HOW WE THINK AND FEEL ABOUT OTHERS AND OURSELVES AND HOW THOSE THOUGHTS MANIFEST WITHIN OUR LIVES AS ENERGY.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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From speaking with my mother I learned that forgiveness is a process that begins with the choice to end your own suffering.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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September 29 I will fear no evil: for thou art with me . . . -- Psalm 23:4 No matter what is happening in your relationships, fear nothing and no one. When you walk with the consciousness of the Creator, there is nothing to fear. Do not fear that people will harm you or leave you. Do not fear people who threaten you. Do not fear obstacles that confront you. Have no fear of harm to your body or possessions, you are walking with the strong ar..
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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d57a564
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Very often we claim to know something. We get an idea about what to do or not do, yet, for some reason our behavior doesn't change. At times, we just can't seem to do what we know. This is known as mental healing. Something has shifted in your thinking, but it has not reach the other levels of your being--the heart and the spirit.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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da45658
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What we eventually uncovered was that I was afraid--afraid to ask for what I wanted, afraid to speak up for myself, afraid that I didn't have what it took to do what I really wanted to do. In response to my fears, I blamed other people for what I considered their failure to acknowledge me. The conversation didn't stop there.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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49a1b64
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As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn't leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I'd still be in prison. --NELSON MANDELA
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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9f62c5f
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I now know that nothing in my life will change until I change the way I see my life and myself.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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e688134
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Whether or not we know what we are creating or how we are creating it, when things do not turn out the way we desire, our human instincts drive us to look for someone to blame.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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57c1e03
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Today I am devoted to addressing all the little things about me and in my life that I have not mastered!
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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868188b
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It doesn't matter what road you take, hill you climb, or path you're on, you will always end up in the same place, learning. -- Ralph Stevenson
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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16a481f
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More often than not, the things we detest and judge in others are a reflection of the things we cannot accept about ourselves.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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0b67908
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You simply cannot pay the debts that come along with believing you are unworthy.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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827e12d
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I have a body, but I am not my body. I have a face, but I am not my face.
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self-awareness
inspirational
self-respect
sexuality
self-esteem
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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f9dd0c6
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Feelings come and they pass. Whatever we are feeling in any given moment is just a passing experience. Our work is to learn to accept what we feel and to learn to let it pass.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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ee4d7e8
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HAD I NOT SPENT SO MUCH TIME DOING SOMETHING THAT MADE ME SO MISERABLE, I WOULD HAVE NEVER LEARNED HOW TO APPRECIATE DOING WHAT BRINGS ME JOY.
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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2ee1013
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Self-pity in its early stages is as snug as a feather mattress. Only when it hardens does it become uncomfortable. -- Maya Angelou
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Iyanla Vanzant |
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8355d4c
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Forgiveness is not an easy chore to undertake, nor is it for the weak. I forgive you, God, for leaving me out here to figure out all of this on my own. Yet forgiveness is the daily minimum requirement for a healthy, fulfilling, and meaningful life. I forgive my mind for believing that what was is what always has to be.
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Iyanla Vanzant |