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75579eb
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Although she was gregarious, she inadvertently separated herself from people because she was so often inside her own head, focusing on her creativity.
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introversion
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Alexandra Robbins |
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ac13c46
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Unruly geeks change the world
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robbins
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Alexandra Robbins |
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8e56f04
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No student should be encouraged -- by anyone -- to change himself until he's "normal," a term that says everything and means nothing."
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Alexandra Robbins |
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096f5a9
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Nothing is more unnerving to the truly conventional than the unashamed misfit.
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Alexandra Robbins |
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3c09c85
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When a child sees herself through the prism of her peer group, the resulting self image can be distorted.
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peer-pressure
popularity
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Alexandra Robbins |
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e3f4b28
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Conformity is not an admirable trait. Conformity is a copout. It threatens self-awareness. It can lead groups to enforce rigid and arbitrary rules.
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Alexandra Robbins |
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cce1ea1
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It was the fact that they tried so hard that doomed them.
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peer-pressure
nonchalance
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Alexandra Robbins |
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0592745
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Awkwardness defines my life.
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Alexandra Robbins |
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f116970
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The trade-off seems like a no-brainer. Would you rather be bribed during your hospital stay with made-to-order omelets or would you rather be, for example, not dead?
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Alexandra Robbins |
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946cc9d
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Social standing does not necessarily translate to social acceptance.
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leadership
popularity
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Alexandra Robbins |
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5a19311
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Being an outsider doesn't necessarily indicate any sort of social failing. We do not view a tuba player as musically challenged if he cannot play the violin.
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talent
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Alexandra Robbins |
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94fbf48
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If schools celebrated student scientists the same way they celebrate student athletes, more students would be encouraged to pursue the subject. Instead, science is considered nerdy because schools help students to paint it that way.
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Alexandra Robbins |
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f2de0e2
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If there is a single factor that spells out the difference between the cafeteria fringe headed for greatness and those doomed for low self-worth, even more than a caring teacher or a group of friends, it is supportive, accepting parents who not only love their children unconditionally, but also don't make them feel as if their idiosyncrasies qualify as "conditions" in the first place."
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mentoring
parenting
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Alexandra Robbins |
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593c93e
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Polarization is just one of many ways group membership can change an individual. Perhaps the most striking effect of group membership is that it can modify individuals' perceptions of themselves. Unable to separate their personal introspection from the ways they believe other people perceive them, teenagers may have what psychologists call an "imaginary audience," meaning they believe that other people are just as attuned to their appearanc..
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Alexandra Robbins |
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fc31e85
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What made Einstein special was his impertinence, his nonconformity, and his distaste for dogma. Einstein's genius reminds us that a society's competitive advantage comes not from teaching the multiplication or periodic tables but from nurturing rebels. Grinds have their place, but unruly geeks change the world. (Walter Issacson, Wired)
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Alexandra Robbins |
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21b1af4
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Too many parents fail to understand that there is a difference between fitting in and being liked, that there is a difference between being "normal" and being happy. High school is temporary. Family is not."
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Alexandra Robbins |
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6d86c04
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Someone else's success is not your failure.
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Alexandra Robbins |
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9711d4d
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Nonconformists aren't just going against the grain; they're going against the brain. Either their brains aren't taking the easy way out to begin with, or in standing apart from their peers, these students are standing up to their biology.
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perception
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Alexandra Robbins |
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795541a
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Conformity is a mask behind which students can hide their identity or the fact that they haven't yet figured out their identity.
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Alexandra Robbins |
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0923f55
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If teachers are uncomfortable at their own school, they will pass on their uncertainties or negative attitude to students.
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mentoring
discipleship
insecurity
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Alexandra Robbins |
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9eb1928
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Polarization (is) a tendency for groups to form judgments that are more extreme than individuals' personal opinions.
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Alexandra Robbins |
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2eef5fa
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Group membership can modify individuals' perceptions of themselves. Unable to separate their personal introspection from the ways they believe other people perceive them, teenagers may have what psychologists call an "imaginary audience", meaning that they believed that other people are just as attuned to their appearance and behavior as they are."
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reputation
perception
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Alexandra Robbins |
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63caf63
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Students usually don't refer to themselves as nerds until someone else accuses them of being one.
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self-perception
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Alexandra Robbins |
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fc24011
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In the midst of a crowd, an individual's layers of restraint peel away, revealing potentially barbaric instincts and a susceptibility to a "crowd contagion."
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peer-pressure
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Alexandra Robbins |
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b1b7859
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The human brain takes in information from other people and incorporates it with the information coming from its own senses, neuroscientist Gregory Berns has written. Many times, the group's opinion trumps the individual's before he even becomes aware of it.
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perception
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Alexandra Robbins |
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672c4d0
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Teenage drinking has been declining since 1999, but students vastly overestimate their classmates' use of alcohol, drugs, and cigarettes. For example, a study conducted at a Midwestern high school when teenage alcohol use was peaking found that students believed that 92% of their peers Frank alcohol and 85% smoked cigarettes. When researchers surveyed the school to unearth the actual statistics, they learned that 47% of students had consume..
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perceptions
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Alexandra Robbins |
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4f43d3c
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You need to add a new voice inside your head, one that says, "So what?" What if you don't get married by 30? So what? What if you haven't paid off your loans or debt by 35? So what? What if you're not a stand-out success by 28? So what? If you were to achieve everything you wanted in life by the age of 30, then what would you do for the next fifty years? You have time. You don't have to get to everything right now."
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Alexandra Robbins |
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2624e2d
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What is to give light must endure burning.' I think people who care for others understand. Caregiving is painful.
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Alexandra Robbins |
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6b414d7
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We live in the Age of Comparison. Too often, we deem our own achievements worthless if they fall short of others' standards. Our best isn't good enough if it's not as good as someone else's best.
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Alexandra Robbins |
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152ff97
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Medicine asked something extraordinary of nurses: to forge intimate connections with another person for hours, weeks, or months, to care thoroughly and holistically--and then to let that individual suddenly go, often never to be heard from again.
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Alexandra Robbins |
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99bfd4c
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As a Minnesota agency nurse said, "We are not just bed-making, drink-serving, poop-wiping, medication-passing assistants. We are much more."
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Alexandra Robbins |
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2b879ba
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In 1967, psychiatrist Leonard Stein described the nurse's role in an essay entitled "The Doctor-Nurse Game." The object of the game, he said, was for a nurse to "make her recommendations appear to be initiated by the physician. . . . The nurse who does see herself as a consultant but refuses to follow the rules of the game in making her recommendations, has hell to pay. The outspoken nurse is labeled a 'bitch' by the surgeon. The psychiatri..
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Alexandra Robbins |
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7fe1d16
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California nurse Jared Axen was holding a dying hospice patient's hand when he began to sing an old hymn. The woman, who didn't speak English, hadn't been responsive in days. But when Axen sang to her, she squeezed his hand, a response that soothed the woman's family. Six years later, Axen, a classically trained musician, sings to some of his patients every day. "It gives them their humanity back," he said. "Music is a common language that ..
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Alexandra Robbins |
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f5fb273
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Imagine what it must be like for teenagers who don't feel they have room to breathe in their own homes. If you are a parent reading this book, you care about your child. If she is quirky, unusual, or nonconformist, ask yourself whether you are doing everything you can to nurture her unusual interests, style, or skills, or whether instead you are directly or subtly pushing her to hide them.
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mentoring
parenting
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Alexandra Robbins |
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e57ddd7
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Random, meaningless groups can adopt an us-versus-them mentality.
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peer-pressure
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Alexandra Robbins |
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a48c786
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Instead of revamping school policies to welcome every child, many school systems are bent on revamping the students to conform to their schools.
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Alexandra Robbins |
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a8e5c03
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A St. Louis oncology nurse quoted Holocaust survivor and psychiatrist Viktor Frankl to States News Service in 2012: " 'What is to give light must endure burning.' I think people who care for others understand. Caregiving is painful."
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Alexandra Robbins |
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c4ee908
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How could he encapsulate in a pithy admissions-interview line all of his unique ideas and interests?
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marketing
persuasion
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Alexandra Robbins |
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493e7ce
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It was a relief to inhabit someone else's life for a while, to get her personal issues for a brief respite. In a play, she knew exactly how all her character's problems would be resolved. No matter how the cast performed, the end turned out the same. No questions, no worries, no unknowns.
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extracurricular-activities
self-consciousness
shyness
drama
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Alexandra Robbins |
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4e6ea35
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Students didn't much like those who verbally or physically beat the crap out of them. But when researchers began measuring aggression alongside perceived popularity, they found an undeniably strong link. Recent studies conclude that aggressive behaviors are now often associated with high social status. Psychologists no longer view aggression as a last-resort tactic of social misfits. Now they see aggression as a means toward social success...
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influence
popularity
power
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Alexandra Robbins |
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944be20
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Sometimes Eli believed his mother was embarrassed by him. "I swear, my mom thinks if I do one thing differently than the average person, I'm weird," Eli said later. "It's like she thinks I'm a freak or something. No matter what I do, it's not 'normal' enough for her."
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mentoring
parenting
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Alexandra Robbins |
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96b85f3
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The cafeteria made him feel like an observer rather than a participant in the high school experience.
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outsiders
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Alexandra Robbins |
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705d314
|
I love my job, and I hope people find comfort in knowing there are still people out there who love what they do." --a New York acute care nurse"
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Alexandra Robbins |
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463564a
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The 1970s, fewer than 25% of US residents lived in counties in which the presidential candidate won by landslide. 30 years later, that percentage has nearly doubled.
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unity
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Alexandra Robbins |