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6a9c824
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studies show that the absence of feeling bad isn't enough to make you happy; you must strive to find sources of feeling good. One
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Gretchen Rubin |
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My home should calm me and energize me. It should be a comforting, quiet refuge and a place of excitement and possibility. It should call to my mind the past, the present, and the future. It should be a snuggery of privacy and reflection, but also a gathering place that strengthened my engagement with other people. By making me feel safe, it should embolden me to take risks. I wanted a feeling of home so strong that no matter where I went, ..
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Gretchen Rubin |
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0347ecb
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As Oscar Wilde wrote, with his characteristic brand of thought-provoking overstatement, "When we are happy we are always good, but when we are good we are not always happy." Now,"
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Gretchen Rubin |
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Although I'd initially underrated its value, the true significance of the fourth element--the atmosphere of growth--had become clearer to me over time. As William Butler Yeats wrote, "Happiness is neither virtue nor pleasure nor this thing nor that, but simply growth. We are happy when we are growing." Research supports his observation: It's not goal attainment, but the process of striving after goals--that is, growth--that brings happiness..
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Gretchen Rubin |
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02c5ca0
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Habits are the invisible architecture of everyday life, and a significant element of happiness. If we have habits that work for us, we're much more likely to be happy, healthy, productive, and creative.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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c24a831
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I was always telling myself, "Keep it simple." But as Albert Einstein pointed out, "Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler."
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Gretchen Rubin |
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begin by tackling the habits that help us to: 1. sleep 2. move 3. eat and drink right 4. unclutter Foundation
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Gretchen Rubin |
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4f74824
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A University of Exeter study showed that people who have control over their workspace design are happier at work, more motivated, healthier, and up to 32 percent more productive.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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79e617c
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the "Hawthorne effect," in which people being studied improve their performance, simply because of the extra attention they're getting. In"
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Gretchen Rubin |
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by mindfully shaping our habits, we can harness the power of mindlessness as a sweeping force for serenity, energy, and growth.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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d8dc176
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While physical activity is a key aspect of the Foundation and has many emotional and physical benefits, people often assume that its most important benefit is something that, ironically, it doesn't provide: exercise doesn't promote weight loss. It seems to help people maintain their weight--active people are less likely to gain or regain weight than inactive people--but it's not associated with weight loss. There are many compelling reasons..
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Gretchen Rubin |
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469cd9f
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If I never do something, it requires no self-control for me; if I do something sometimes, it requires enormous self-control.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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392ad9f
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We all know the secret of dieting--eat better, eat less, exercise more--it's the application that's challenging. I had to create a scheme to put happiness ideas into practice in my life.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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a7bc5ab
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Sprinters are pleased with their work product, because sprinting is how they do their best work. Procrastinators aren't pleased with their work product; they know they could've done a better job if they'd allowed themselves more time.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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0fdc2a0
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one Secret of Adulthood is "Never start a sentence with the words 'No offense'"? "And"
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Gretchen Rubin |
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When it comes to fake food, I'm like Samuel Johnson, who remarked, "Abstinence is as easy to me as temperance would be difficult."
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Gretchen Rubin |
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8de487c
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Zhivite v real'nom mire. Zakroite elektronnuiu pochtu, otkliuchite telefon i internet.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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9dd8283
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leisure must be entered on the schedule as its own activity; it's not something I get only when I have nothing else to do. Because I always have something else to do. Having
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Gretchen Rubin |
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3a65d0b
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Upholder, I see its dark side, too
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Gretchen Rubin |
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1585ad4
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Happiness," wrote Yeats, "is neither virtue nor pleasure nor this thing nor that, but simply growth. We are happy when we are growing."
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Gretchen Rubin |
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6c13c85
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How I Like to Spend My Time At what time of day do I feel energized? When do I drag? Do I like racing from one activity to another, or do I prefer unhurried transitions? What activities take up my time but aren't particularly useful or stimulating? Would I like to spend more time with friends, or by myself? Do I have several things on my calendar that I anticipate with pleasure? What can I do for hours without feeling bored? What daily or w..
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Gretchen Rubin |
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bac64c0
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What I Value What's most satisfying to me: saving time, or money, or effort? Does it bother me to act differently from other people, or do I get a charge out of it? Do I spend a lot of time on something that's important to someone else, but not to me? If I had $500 that I had to spend on fun, how would I spend it? Do I like to listen to experts, or do I prefer to figure things out for myself? Does spending money on an activity make me feel ..
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Gretchen Rubin |
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4d4a35b
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My Current Habits Am I more likely to indulge in a bad habit in a group, or when I'm alone? If I could magically, effortlessly change one habit in my life, what would it be? If the people around me could change one of my habits, what would they choose? Of my existing habits, which would I like to see my children adopt? Or not?
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Gretchen Rubin |
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b9038ee
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People have an inborn disposition that's set within a certain range, but they can boost themselves to the top of their happiness range or push themselves down to the bottom of their happiness range by their actions.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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20fcd59
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We all know the secret of dieting - eat better, eat less, exercise more - it's the application that's challenging.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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8b158dc
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impunity.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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636b524
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Sprinters call Marathoners "plodding," and Marathoners call Sprinters "irresponsible," but there's no right way. Procrastinators, however, are happier when they change their work habits to work more steadily."
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Gretchen Rubin |
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7a826da
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Overbuyers, by contrast, find excuses to buy. They accumulate large quantities of office supplies or kitchen gadgets or travel paraphernalia with the thought "This will probably come in handy someday." When trying to shape a habit, overbuyers tend to load up on equipment or services that they imagine will help them keep their good habits."
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Gretchen Rubin |
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64156c6
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A promotion-focused person recycles in order to make the environment cleaner; a prevention-focused person recycles in order to avoid getting a fine. Different arguments resonate with different people, and it's helpful to frame a habit in the way that suits each individual.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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But perhaps the most acute sense of happiness from writing was the happiness of expressing a very complicated idea - the kind of idea that takes hundreds of pages to capture.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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Working is one of the most dangerous forms of procrastination.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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There's no evidence for the belief that "letting off steam" is healthy or constructive. In fact, studies show that aggressively expressing anger doesn't relieve anger but amplifies it. On the other hand, not expressing anger often allows it to disappear without leaving ugly traces."
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Gretchen Rubin |
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So convenient a thing it is to be a reasonable creature, since it enables one to find or make a reason for everything one has a mind to do. --BENJAMIN FRANKLIN, Autobiography
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Gretchen Rubin |
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2e33cd8
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My research had revealed that challenge and novelty are key elements to happiness. The brain is stimulated by surprise, and successfully dealing with an unexpected situation gives a powerful sense of satisfaction.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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a15fe1e
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There is a myth, sometimes widespread, that a person need do only inner work . . . that a man is entirely responsible for his own problems; and that to cure himself, he need only change himself. . . . The fact is, a person is so formed by his surroundings, that his state of harmony depends entirely on his harmony with his surroundings. --Christopher Alexander, The Timeless Way of Building
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Gretchen Rubin |
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8c5b85f
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My home is a place of unconditional belonging, which is part of its pleasure, part of its pain--as Robert Frost wrote, home is "Something you somehow haven't to deserve."
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Gretchen Rubin |
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38e89b7
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Then I wonder if some people need a coach more than a therapist," I said, thinking of Obligers."
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Gretchen Rubin |
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508e243
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He gave his assistant a stamped, addressed envelope with a check he'd written to an "anti-charity," an organization whose policies he passionately opposes, with the instruction to mail the check if he had a drink before the time was up."
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Gretchen Rubin |
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9880be0
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Jamie has a transition habit when he comes home from work. He gives everyone a hello kiss, then disappears for twenty minutes or so. He changes out of his suit, sends one last round of emails, glances at a magazine, and then he's ready to join the family.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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9839fcd
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A happy home wasn't a place that I could furnish, but an attitude of mind I must develop.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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Gary Taubes, Why We Get Fat: And What to Do About It (New York: Anchor Books, 2010). For an expanded discussion of Taubes's arguments, see Good Calories, Bad Calories: Fats, Carbs, and the Controversial Science of Diet and Health (New York: Anchor Books, 2008). It includes a helpful summary of Taubes's conclusions (p. 454): 1. Dietary fat, whether saturated or not, is not a cause of obesity, heart disease, or any other chronic disease of ci..
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Gretchen Rubin |
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6fcfd36
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I've been haunted for years by a public service poster I saw just one time, in the subway. It was a photo of a Chinese food take-out container sitting on top of two videos. The caption read, "If this is how you spend your time, why are you living in New York?"
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Gretchen Rubin |
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986c8a5
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Technology is a good servant but a bad master.
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Gretchen Rubin |
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Erasmus's The Praise of Folly. According to a footnote, the argument of the growing heap is: If ten coins are not enough to make a man rich, what if you add one coin? What if you add another? Finally, you will have to say that no one can be rich unless one coin can make him so.
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Gretchen Rubin |