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I'm not here so my business self can talk to their business selves. I'm here to talk from my hearts to their hearts.
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Brené Brown |
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For me, and for many of us, our first waking thought of the day is "I didn't get enough sleep." The next one is "I don't have enough time." Whether true or not, that thought of not enough occurs to us automatically before we even think to question or examine it. We spend most of the hours and the days of our lives hearing, explaining, complaining, or worrying about what we don't have enough of....Before we even sit up in bed, before our fee..
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Brené Brown |
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Well, no. They are both serious epidemics, but shame is a silent epidemic. People understand violence and can talk about it. We're still afraid of shame. Even the word is uncomfortable.
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Brené Brown |
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Unfortunately, being low maintenance also meant not asking for what you needed and never inconveniencing anyone.
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Brené Brown |
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Shame keeps worthiness away by convincing us that owning our stories will lead to people thinking less of us. Shame is all about fear. We're afraid that people won't like us if they know the truth about who we are, where we come from, what we believe, how much we're struggling, or, believe it or not, how wonderful we are when soaring (sometimes it's just as hard to own our strengths as our struggles).
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Brené Brown |
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Comparison is the thief of happiness.
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Brené Brown |
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What almost no one understands is how every level of severity in this diagnosis is underpinned by shame. Which means we don't "fix it" by cutting people down to size and reminding folks of their inadequacies and smallness. Shame is more likely to be the cause of these behaviors, not the cure."
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Brené Brown |
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597b2c6
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If we want to reignite innovation and passion, we have to rehumanize work. When shame becomes a management style, engagement dies. When failure is not an option we can forget about learning, creativity, and innovation.
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Brené Brown |
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3d3683a
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Pema Chodron. In her book The Places That Scare You, Chodron writes: When we practice generating compassion, we can expect to experience our fear of pain. Compassion practice is daring. It involves learning to relax and allow ourselves to move gently toward what scares us....In cultivating compassion we draw from the wholeness of our experience--our suffering, our empathy, as well as our cruelty and terror. It has to be this way. Compassion..
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Brené Brown |
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May you always do for others and let others do for you. --Bob Dylan
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Brené Brown |
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Gratitude, therefore, emerged from the data as the antidote to foreboding joy.
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Brené Brown |
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Staying real" is one of the most courageous battles that we'll ever fight."
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Brené Brown |
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connection as "the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship."
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Brené Brown |
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a73836b
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A map does not just chart, it unlocks and formulates meaning; it forms bridges between here and there, between disparate ideas that we did not know were previously connected. --Reif Larsen I love maps not because they dictate the route or tell me when or how to travel, but simply because they mark the waypoints I will eventually visit. Knowing that these places exist and that they are well traveled, even if they are unexplored by me, is pow..
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Brené Brown |
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hope is a combination of setting goals, having the tenacity and perseverance to pursue them, and believing in our own abilities.
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Brené Brown |
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Bishop's book tells the story of how we've geographically, politically, and even spiritually sorted ourselves into like-minded groups in which we silence dissent, grow more extreme in our thinking, and consume only facts that support our beliefs--making it even easier to ignore evidence that our positions are wrong. He writes, "As a result, we now live in a giant feedback loop, hearing our own thoughts about what's right and wrong bounced b..
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Brené Brown |
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Spirituality is recognizing and celebrating that we are all inextricably connected to one another by a power greater than all of us, and that our connection to that power and to one another is grounded in love and belonging.
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Brené Brown |
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What starts as a small disagreement about an unimportant issue becomes a fight over wrongly assigned intentions and hurt feelings.
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Brené Brown |
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The big challenge for leaders is getting our heads and hearts around the fact that we need to cultivate the courage to be uncomfortable and to teach the people around us how to accept discomfort as a part of growth. For
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Brené Brown |
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For leaders, vulnerability often looks and feels like discomfort. In his book Tribes: We Need You to Lead Us, Seth Godin writes, "Leadership is scarce because few people are willing to go through the discomfort required to lead. This scarcity makes leadership valuable....It's uncomfortable to stand up in front of strangers. It's uncomfortable to propose an idea that might fail. It's uncomfortable to challenge the status quo. It's uncomforta..
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Brené Brown |
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Acknowledging vulnerability is possible only if we feel we can reach out for support. To do so, we must feel some competence in our relationships." The likelihood of our finding the insight and courage to acknowledge our personal vulnerabilities is dependent on our ability to share and talk about those vulnerabilities with someone we trust and with whom we feel safe."
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Brené Brown |
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Shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.
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Brené Brown |
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I define wholehearted living as engaging in our lives from a place of worthiness. It means cultivating the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough. It's going to bed at night thinking, Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn't change the truth that I am brave and worthy of love and belonging
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Brené Brown |
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I remember a very tender moment from that year, when Steve and I were lying on the floor watching Ellen do a series of crazy, arm-flinging, and knee-slapping dances and tumbles. I looked at Steve and said, "Isn't it funny how I just love her that much more for being so vulnerable and uninhibited and goofy. I could never do that. Can you imagine knowing that you're loved like that?" Steve looked at me and said, "I love you exactly like that...
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Brené Brown |
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In a 1968 speech given to striking sanitation workers in Memphis, Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr., defined power as the ability to achieve purpose and effect change. This is the most accurate and important definition of power that I've ever seen. The definition does not make the nature of power inherently good or bad, which aligns with what I've learned in my work. What makes power dangerous is how it's used.
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Brené Brown |
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When looking at the attributes associated with masculinity in the US, the same researchers identified the following; winning, emotional control, risk-taking, violence, dominance, playboy, self-reliance, primacy at work, power over women, disdain for homosexuality, and pursuit of status.
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precarious-mascuinity
toxic-masculinity
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Brené Brown |
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49b65b2
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It was December 15, 2012, the day after twenty-year-old Adam Lanza fatally shot twenty children between six and seven years old, as well as six adult staff members, at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut. I remember thinking, Maybe if all the mothers in the world crawled on their hands and knees toward those parents in Newtown, we could take some of the pain away. We could spread their pain across all of our hearts. I would..
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Brené Brown |
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Somewhere along the way, they adopted this dangerous and debilitating belief system: I am what I accomplish and how well I accomplish it. Please. Perform. Perfect. Prove. Healthy striving is self-focused: How can I improve? Perfectionism is other-focused: What will people think? Perfectionism is a hustle.
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Brené Brown |
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In either case, if you come across an explanation of vulnerability that doesn't include setting boundaries or being clear on intentions, proceed with caution. Vulnerability for vulnerability's sake is not effective, useful, or smart.
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Brené Brown |
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It turns out that trust is in fact earned in the smallest of moments. It is earned not through heroic deeds, or even highly visible actions, but through paying attention, listening, and gestures of genuine care and connection.
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Brené Brown |
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Knowledge is power and power is never diminished by sharing it--it is only increased.
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Brené Brown |
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The culture of shame is driven by fear, blame and disconnection, and it is often a powerful incubator for issues like perfectionism, stereotyping, gossiping and addiction.
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Brené Brown |
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Curiosity is unruly. It doesn't like rules, or, at least, it assumes that all rules are provisional, subject to the laceration of a smart question nobody has yet thought to ask. It disdains the approved pathways, preferring diversions, unplanned excursions, impulsive left turns. In short, curiosity is deviant.
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Brené Brown |
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But this work has forced me to see that it's our fear of the unknown and our fear of being wrong that create most of our conflict and anxiety. We need both faith and reason to make meaning in an uncertain world. "The opposite of faith is not doubt, but uncertainty." --Anne Lamott The Serenity prayer: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the differenc..
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Brené Brown |
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When we were children, we used to think that when we were grown up we would no longer be vulnerable. But to grow up is to accept vulnerability. To be alive is to be vulnerable. --Madeleine L'Engle The
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Brené Brown |
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Anne Lamott, whom I once heard say, "Laughter is a bubbly, effervescent form of holiness." Amen!"
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Brené Brown |
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bullshit is a greater enemy of the truth than lies are. Harry G. Frankfurt, Professor Emeritus, Yale University (From his book, On Bullshit)
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Brené Brown |
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Joseph Chilton Pearce writes, "What we are teaches the child more than what we say, so we must be what we want our children to become."
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Brené Brown |
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When we were children, we used to think that when we were grown up we would no longer be vulnerable. But to grow up is to accept vulnerability. To be alive is to be vulnerable. --Madeleine L'Engle
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Brené Brown |
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I remain inspired and transformed by something I learned from Harriet Lerner's book The Dance of Connection.3 Dr. Lerner explains that we all have patterned ways of managing anxiety. Some of us respond to anxiety by overfunctioning and others by underfunctioning. Overfunctioners tend to move quickly to advise, rescue, take over, micromanage, and get in other people's business rather than look inward. Underfunctioners tend to get less compet..
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Brené Brown |
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the biggest mistake people make is not acknowledging fear and uncertainty.
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Brené Brown |
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Shame hates to have words wrapped around it. If we talk about it, it loses its grip on us.
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Brené Brown |