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1de4a94
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And brave. Encourage her to speak her mind, to say what she really thinks, to speak truthfully. And then praise her when she does. Praise her especially when she takes a stand that is difficult or unpopular because it happens to be her honest position. Tell her that kindness matters. Praise her when she is kind to other people. But teach her that her kindness must never be taken for granted. Tell her that she, too, deserves the kindness of ..
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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cf736fa
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Soon," he said in his letter. They said "soon" to each other often, and "soon" gave their plan the weight of something real."
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romance
pining
waiting
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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ec34b30
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One of the things I've learned is that everybody in this country has the mentality of scarcity. We imagine that even the things that are not scarce are scarce. And it breeds a kind of desperation in everybody. Even the wealthy.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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9b33945
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La triste verdad es que nuestro mundo esta repleto de hombres y mujeres a quienes no les gustan las mujeres poderosas. Nos han condicionado tanto con que el poder es masculino que una mujer poderosa nos parece una aberracion.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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95010a7
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We say to girls: You can have ambition, but not too much. You should aim to be successful but not too successful, otherwise you will threaten the man. If you are the breadwinner in your relationship with a man, pretend that you are not, especially in public, otherwise you will emasculate him. But
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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b36fafc
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A book did not qualify as literature unless it had polysyllabic words and incomprehensible passages.
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literature
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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63581c7
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Please don't speak Igbo to him,' Aunty Uju said. 'Two languages will confuse him.' 'What are you talking about, Aunty? We spoke two languages growing up.' 'This is America. It's different.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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8fbbbcf
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Of course they nurse resentment, as they well should, but it has somehow managed to leave their spirits whole.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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b5a7075
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She is one of those black people who want to be the only black person in the room, so any other black person is an immediate threat to her.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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64b24ef
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She did not understand grunge, the idea of looking shabby because you could afford not to be shabby; it mocked true shabbiness.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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d7593a5
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He was left-leaning and well-meaning, crippled by his acknowledgement of his own many privileges. He never allowed himself to have an opinion. 'Yes, I see what you mean,' he said often.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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f955cca
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But Nature is unfair to women. An act is done by two people, but if there are any consequences, one person carries it alone.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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e650ff1
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They would not understand why people like him, who were raised well fed and watered but mired in dissatisfaction, conditioned from birth to look towards somewhere else, eternally convinced that real lives happened in that somewhere else, were now resolved to do dangerous things, illegal things, so as to leave, none of them starving, or raped, or from burned villages, but merely hungry for choice and certainty.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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863c611
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Tente nao usar demais palavras como "misoginia" e "patriarcado" com Chizalum. Nos, feministas, as vezes usamos muitos jargoes, e o jargao as vezes pode ser abstrato demais. Nao se limite a rotular alguma coisa de misogina - explique a ela por que aquilo e misogino e como poderia deixar de ser."
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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d85ee88
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Ensine Chizalum a questionar os homens que so conseguem sentir empatia pelas mulheres dentro de uma rede de relacoes, e nao como individuos humanos iguais. Homens que, discutindo o estupro, sempre dirao algo como: "se fosse minha filha ou esposa ou irma". Mas esses homens nao precisam imaginar um homem vitima de um crime "como irmao ou filho" para sentir empatia."
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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9b92277
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Ifemelu was looking forward to being away from home, to the independence of owning her own time.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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68a9391
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Something about the way Chinedu said his name, Abidemi, made her think of gently pressing on a sore muscle, the kind of self-inflicted ache that is satisfying.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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0765e12
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But she had not had a bold epiphany and there was no cause; it was simply that layer after layer of discontent had settled in her, and formed a mass that now propelled her.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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4143d0c
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Besides, humility had always seemed to him a specious thing, invented for the comfort of others; you were praised for humility by people because you did not make them feel any more lacking than they already did.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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06ee3ac
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She felt as if she had somehow failed him and herself by allowing his mother's behavior to upset her. She should be above it; she should shrug it off as the ranting of a village woman; she should not keep thinking of all the retorts she could have made instead of just standing mutely in that kitchen. But she was upset, and made even more so by Odenigbo's expression, as if he could not believe she was not quite as high-minded as he had thoug..
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relationships
emotions
failure
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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1242606
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But Kimberly's unhappiness was inward, unacknowledged, shielded by her desire for things to be as they should, and also by hope: she believed in other people's happiness because it meant that she, too, might one day have it. Laura's unhappiness was different, spiky, she wished that everyone around her were unhappy because she had convinced herself that she would always be.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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7b58505
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there was an impatience in her tone, almost an accusation, as she added that academics were not intellectuals; they were not curious, they built their stolid tents of specialized knowledge and stayed securely in them.
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intellectuals
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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368f208
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They said "soon" to each other often, and "soon" gave their plan the weight of something real."
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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fe39252
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Today we live in a vastly different world. The person more qualified to lead is not the physically stronger person. It is the more intelligent, the more knowledgeable, the more creative, more innovative. And there are no hormones for those attributes. A man is likely as a woman to be intelligent, innovative, creative. We have evolved. But our ideas of gender have not evolved very much.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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b1605b8
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In secondary school, a boy and a girl go out, both of them teenagers with meager pocket money. Yet the boy is expected to pay the bills, always, to prove his masculinity.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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c0ad757
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But by far the worst thing we do to males--by making them feel they have to be hard--is that we leave them with very fragile egos. The harder a man feels compelled to be, the weaker his ego is. And
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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182a268
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When your uncle first married me, I worried because I thought those women outside would come and displace me from my home. I now know that nothing he does will make my life change. My life will only change if I want it to change.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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529fd08
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Some people can take up too much space by simply being, that by existing, some people can stifle others.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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e8e8f69
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Why should a woman's success be a threat to a man? What if we decide to simply dispose of that word--and I don't know if there is an English word I dislike more than this--emasculation.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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e2b9e83
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For me, feminism is always contextual.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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67c396d
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Make dressing a question of taste and attractiveness instead of a question of morality.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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cdcd6c1
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Her relationship with him was like being content in a house but always sitting by the window and looking out
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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6760bf1
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If we ran Nigeria like this cell," he said, "we would have no problems in this country. Things are so organized. Our cell has a Chief called General Abacha and he has a second in command. Once you come in, you have to give them some money. If you don't, you're in trouble."
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irony
cell-one
nnamabia
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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fe18234
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Like how the government of General Abacha was using its foreign policy to legitimize itself in the eyes of other African countries.
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legitimacy
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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7495990
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The knowledge of cooking does not come pre-installed in a vagina. ... If we stopped conditioning women to see marriage as a prize, then we would have fewer debates about a wife needing to cook in order to earn that prize.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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601685c
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And, in the pride in her eyes, he saw a shinier, better version of himself.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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edb9db4
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They also found a burial chamber, didn't they?' Richard asked. 'Yes.' 'Do you think it was used by the king?' Pa Anozie gave Richard a long, pained look and mumbled something for a while, looking grieved. Emeka laughed before he translated. 'Papa said he thought you were among the white people who know something. He said the people of Igboland do not know what a king is. We have priests and elders. The burial place was maybe for a priest. B..
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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3192396
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she thought that the romance novelists were wrong and it was men, not women, who were the true romantics.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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23a6c13
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he lived in London indeed but invisibly, his existence like an erased pencil sketch
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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9a7d991
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To clarify, when white people say dark they mean Greek or Italian but when black people say dark they mean Grace Jones.)
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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8b82121
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You must nod back when a black person nods at you in a heavily white area. It is called the black nod. It is a way for black people to say "You are not alone, I am here too."
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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e792025
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Gender as it functions today is a grave injustice. I am angry. We should all be angry.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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781a166
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But by far the worst thing we do to males - by making them feel they have to be hard - is that we leave them with very fragile egos. The harder a man feels compelled to be, the weaker his ego is. And then we do a much greater disservice to girls, because we raise them to cater to the fragile egos of males. We
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
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903937c
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We spend too much time teaching girls to worry about what boys think of them. But the reverse is not the case. We don't teach boys to care about being likable.
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |