|
0a887bf
|
The current state of knowledge can be summarized thus: In the beginning, there was nothing, which exploded.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
d7c3396
|
The trouble with gods is that after enough people start believing in them, they begin to exist. And what begins to exist isn't what was originally intended.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
14a8531
|
And it be well for a knowlessman that he should not be here, for he would be taken from this place and his gaskin slit, his moules shown to the four winds, his welchet torn asunder with many hooks and his figgin placed upon a spike (...)
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
0be1f42
|
Anyway, Angua seemed to have taken this case personally. She always had a soft spot for the underdog. So did Vimes. You had to. Not because they were pure or noble, because they weren't. You had to be on the side of underdogs because they weren't overdogs.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
2b8f504
|
A shepherd's crown, not a royal one. A crown for someone who knew where she had come from. A crown for the lone light zigzagging through the night sky, hunting for a single lost lamb. A crown for the shepherd who was there to herd away the predators.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
12fe6ba
|
had decided what to do, which was to smile like the morning sun with a knife in its teeth.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
dee2ea7
|
That doesn't sound very reliable to me," said the druid nastily. "How can a book know what day it is? Paper can't count."
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
c0edf6f
|
It was the heart of any scam or fiddle -- keep the punter uncertain, or, if he is certain, make him certain of the wrong thing.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
414383e
|
Having to haul around extra poundage was far too much effort, so he saw to it that he never put it on and he kept himself in trim because doing things with decent muscles was far less effort than trying to achieve things with bags of flab.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
3e00659
|
this is the room where the future pours into the past via the pinch of now.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
841b413
|
I thought, in Nature, the defeated animal just rolls on its back in submission and that's the end of it,' said Vimes, as they clattered after the disappearing swamp dragon. 'Wouldn't work with dragons,' said Lady Ramkin. 'Some daft creature rolls on its back, you disembowel it. That's how they look at it. Almost human, really.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
95c9fda
|
Look, this is just the cemetery. It's got bylaws and things! It's not Transylvania! There's just dead people here! That doesn't make it scary, does it? Dead people are people who were living once! You wouldn't be so worked up if there were living people buried here, would you?
|
|
humor
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
65586a1
|
We got the spell exactly right. Except for the ingredients. And most of the poetry. And it probably wasn't the right time. And Gytha took most of it home for the cat, which couldn't of been proper.
|
|
witches
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
597ed6f
|
Sometimes people fools themselves into believing things that aren't true. Sometimes that can be quite dangerous for the person. They see the world in a wrong way. They won't let themselves see that what they believe is wrong. But often there is a part of the mind that does know, and the right words can let it out.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
4430b73
|
Fresh wounds," said Angua. "But one of them did shoot one of the other in the leg by accident." "I think you'd better put in your report as -self inflicted- wounds while resisting arrest," said Vimes."
|
|
police
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
3557cac
|
There is a type of girl who, while incapable of cleaning her bedroom even at knife point, will fight for the privilege of being allowed to spend the day shoveling manure in a stable.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
5b56d89
|
Some people are born to command. Some people achieve command. And others have command thrust upon them ...
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
d9f4585
|
They think they want good government and justice for all, Vimes, yet what is it they really crave, deep in their hearts? Only that things go on as normal and tomorrow is pretty much like today.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
99d90c4
|
Er, why do you need to work in a dark room, though?" he said. "The imps don't need it, do they?" "Ah, zis is for my experiment," said Otto proudly. "You know zat another term for an iconographer would be 'photographer'? From the old word in Latation, vhich means - " "'To prance around like a pillock ordering everyone about as if you owned the place'", said William. "Ah, you know it!"
|
|
humourous
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
b5e2ee5
|
I'd better say at the start that I don't actually believe in magic any more than I believe in astrology, because I'm a Taurean and we don't go in for all that weirdo occult stuff.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
4fa5db2
|
Untruthful?" said Ridcully. "Me? I'm as honest as the day is long! Yes, what is it this time?" Ponder had tugged at his robe and now he whispered something in his ear. Ridcully cleared his throat. "I am reminded that this is in fact the shortest day of the year," he said. "However, this does not undermine the point that I just made, although I thank my colleague for his invaluable support and constant readiness to correct minor if not downr..
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
164182e
|
Typical artist,' said Granny. 'He just painted the showy stuff in the front... And what about these cherubs? We're not going to get them too, are we? I don't like to see little babies flying through the air.' 'They turn up in a lot of old paintings,' said Nanny Ogg. 'They put them in to show it's Art and not just naughty pictures of ladies with not many clothes on.' 'Well, they're not fooling ME,' said Granny Weatherwax.
|
|
humor
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
5700cca
|
If I'd had to buy you, you wouldn't be worth the price.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
9112313
|
It was a sound as soft as the first drop of rain on a century of dust.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
899825d
|
That'll do
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
20c5915
|
The problem is, people only think for themselves if you tell them to.
|
|
intelligence
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
92f3663
|
The plain old Sam Vimes had fought back. He got rid of most of the plumes and the stupid tights, and ended up with a dress uniform that at least looked as though its owner was male. But the helmet had gold decoration, and the bespoke armourers had made a new, gleaming breastplate with useless gold ornamentation on it. Sam Vimes felt like a class traitor every time he wore it. He hated being thought of as one of those people that wore stupid..
|
|
humourous
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
de84c61
|
Lawn looked down at his patient. "In the words of the philosopher Sceptum, the founder of my profession: am I going to get paid for this?"
|
|
humourous
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
0ed2161
|
Decided to put aside ethnic differences in the cause of making more money.
|
|
humor
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
2bbb5d2
|
In fact the Guild, he liked to think, practiced the ultimate democracy. You didn't need intelligence, social position, beauty or charm to hire it. You just needed money which, unlike the other stuff, was available to everyone. Except for the poor, of course, but there was no helping some people.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
145e6a8
|
To be frank, I thought you were going to marry the princess.' Mort blushed. 'We talked about it,' he said. 'Then we thought, just because you happen to rescue a princess, you shouldn't rush into things.' 'Very wise. Too many young women leap into the arms of the first young man to wake them after a hundred years' sleep, for example.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
9e6a620
|
This was music that had not only escaped, but had robbed a bank on the way out. It was music with its sleeves rolled up and its top button undone, raising its hat and grinning and stealing the silver.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
8d9e003
|
He'd forgotten the ancient wisdom: take care, when you are closely observing, that you are not closely observed.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
de73a36
|
He had a notebook. He took notes in it. It was always useful. And them Sybil, gods bless her, had brought him this fifteen-function imp which did so many other things, although as far as he could see at least ten of its functions consisted of apologizing for its inefficiency in the other five.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
55f8b05
|
Bein' a soldier is not hard. If it was, soldiers would not be able to do it.
|
|
soldiers
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
28b4c5c
|
A dollar for a human bought a loaf of bread that was eaten in a few bites. The same dollar for Wee Mad Arthur bought the same-sized loaf, but it was food for a week and could then be further hollowed out and used as a bedroom.
|
|
wee-mad-arthur
feet-of-clay
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
7a32651
|
What was it that Granny Weatherwax had said once? "Evil starts when you begin to treat people as things". And right now it would happen if you thought there was a thing called a father, and a thing called a mother, and a thing called a daughter, and a thing called a cottage, and told yourself that if you put them all together you had a thing called a happy family."
|
|
good
morality
humanity
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
c774668
|
It dawned on him--very slowly, because it was a completely new sensation--that someone in the world was frightened of him. The complete reverse was so often the case that he had come to think of it as a kind of natural law.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
aaa163c
|
He didn't administer a reign of terror, just the occasional light shower.
|
|
reign-of-terror
shower
vetinari
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
0febab4
|
I'm made up of the memories of my parents and grandparents, all my ancestors. They're in the way I look, in the color of my hair. And I'm made up of everyone I've ever met who's changed the way I think. So who is 'me'?
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
799e95f
|
Colon looked awkward, as if the bunched underwear of the past was tangling itself in the crotch of recollection.
|
|
humourous
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
ae559b1
|
But if it is true that the act of observing changes the thing which is observed (because of Quantum), it's even more true that it changes the observer.
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
1f3787a
|
as self-centered as a tornado,
|
|
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
978b1fb
|
drink levels all mankind. It is the ultimate democrat
|
|
drinking
cynicism
democracy
|
Terry Pratchett |