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e03058d I'm like that, nothing sticks. Gillian Flynn
e7cd880 I got it, Go said. Go home, fuck her brains out, then smack her with your penis and scream, There's some wood for you bitch! Gillian Flynn
acc6a5e Sometimes I think illness sits inside every woman, waiting for the right moment to bloom. Gillian Flynn
960b6f2 Soul mates. They really call themselves that, which makes sense, because I guess they are ... They have no harsh edges with each other, no spiny conflicts, they ride though life like conjoined jellyfish - expanding and contracting instinctively, filling each other's spaces liquidly. Making it look easy. happiness ideal-love ideal-lover jellyfish love marriage other-half peace perfection relationships soul-mate soul-mates true-love unconditional-love Gillian Flynn
282e205 I don't even want to ask,' he said. 'You two are the most fucked-up people I have ever met, and I specialize in fucked-up people. Gillian Flynn
f17f93c When I was fourteen, I thought a lot about killing myself--it's a hobby today, but at age fourteen it was a vocation. On a September morning, just after school started, I'd gotten Diane's .44 Magnum and held it, babylike, in my lap for hours. What an indulgence it would be, to just blow off my head, all my mean spirits disappearing with a gun blast, like blowing a seedy dandelion apart. But I thought about Diane, and her coming home to my s.. Gillian Flynn
a77ab7e my father, [was] a mid-level phonecompany manager who treated my mother at best like an incompetent employee. At worst? He never beat her, but his pure, inarticulate fury would fill the house for days, weeks, at a time, making the air humid, hard to breathe, my father stalking around with his lower jaw jutting out, giving him the look of a wounded, vengeful boxer, grinding his teeth so loud you could hear it across the room ... I'm sure he .. abusive abusive-parents anger broken-home childhood childhood-memories communication divorce emotional-abuse family father fight fighting fights fury heartbreak heartbroken love love-lost malice mental-abuse mother parenthood parents parents-and-children rage scared sexism silence terror Gillian Flynn
dadcb05 He's calling you a Cool Girl to fool you! That's what men do: they try to make it sound like you are the cool girl so you will bow to their wishes. Like a car salesman saying, how much do you want to pay for this beauty? When you didn't agree to buy it yet. Gillian Flynn
25fc956 I was never really on my side in any argument. I liked the Old Testament spitefulness of the phrase Sometimes women do. mistreated women Gillian Flynn
818a273 It was silly but incredibly sweet, these people spending so much energy trying to figure me out. The answer: I don't like cherries. Gillian Flynn
a073397 Amy's basically exploiting the sociopath's most reliable maxim. The bigger the lie, the more they believe it. Gillian Flynn
30b3ab6 I didn't think past the first step of anything, that was the key. I drank a Coke and didn't worry about how to recycle the can or about the acid puddling in my belly, acid so powerful it could strip clean a penny. We went to a dumb movie and I didn't worry about the offensive sexism or the lack of minorities in meaningful roles. I didn't even worry about anything that came next. Nothing had consequence, I was living in the moment, and I cou.. love sociopath Gillian Flynn
57718d2 Sleep is like a cat: It only comes to you if you ignore it. I drank more and continued my mantra. 'Stop thinking', swig, 'empty your head', swig, 'now, seriously empty your head'. alcoholic alone binging cat cats drinking empty-your-head ignorance ignoring insomnia lonely mantra murphy-s-law playing-hard-to-get self-assurance sleep sleeping stop-thinking talking-to-yourself the-mind thinking thinking-process thoughts voices-inside-your-head Gillian Flynn
9362b1c It sounded artificial, like a beauty pageant contestant pledging world peace. I did feel sad, but articulating it seemed cheap to me. Gillian Flynn
6d7c666 If she's sad or upset or angry, she needs to be alone-she fears a man dismissing her womanly tears. Gillian Flynn
03f11f0 She'll never really let me go. She likes the game too much." "Then stop playing it." Gillian Flynn
5e6c128 Republicans go to Sam's Club, Democrats go to Costco. Gillian Flynn
36f2192 And if all of us are play-acting, there can be no such thing as a soul mate, because we don't have genuine souls. Gillian Flynn
8ad7580 It's good.' She chirps the last bit as if that were all to say about a book: It's good or it's bad. I liked it or I didn't. No discussions of the writing, the themes, the nuances, the structure. Just good or bad. Like a hot dog. Gillian Flynn
a5da4a4 I don't know that we are actually human at this point, those of us who are like most of us, who grew up with TV and movies and now the Internet. If we are betrayed, we know the words to say; when a loved one dies, we know the words to say. If we want to play the stud or the smart-ass or the fool, we know the words to say. We are all working from the same dog-eared script. It's a very difficult era in which to be a person, just a real, actua.. gone-girl society Gillian Flynn
81da598 She'd always been one of those girls who wanted what anyone else had, even if she didn't want it. Gillian Flynn
7a94daa I lack formal education. So I'm left with the feeling that I'm smarter than everyone around me but that if I ever got around really smart people--people who went to universities and drank wine and spoke Latin--that they'd be bored as hell by me. It's a lonely way to go through life. gillian-flynn lonliness smart smartness Gillian Flynn
2cd6c07 The actual stuff my family owned, those boxes under my stairs, I can't quite bear to look at. I like other people's things better. They come with other people's history. Gillian Flynn
f5afadc The ones who are not soul-mated - the ones who have settled - are even more dismissive of my singleness: It's not that hard to find someone to marry, they say. No relationship is perfect, they say - they, who make do with dutiful sex and gassy bedtime rituals, who settle for TV as conversation, who believe that husbandly capitulation - yes, honey, okay, honey - is the same as concord. He's doing what you tell him to do because he doesn't ca.. Gillian Flynn
0e42a7f Camille?" Her voice quiet and girlish and unsure. "You know how people sometimes say they have to hurt because if they don't, they're so numb they won't feel anything?" "Mmm." "What if it's the opposite?" Amma whispered. "What if you hurt because it feels so good? Like you have a tingling, like someone left a switch on in your body. And nothing can turn that switch off except hurting? What does that mean?" I pretended to be asleep. I preten.. Gillian Flynn
e08ffdf Whenever I see news stories about children who were killed by their parents, I think: But how could it be? They cared enough to give this kid a name, they had a moment--at least one moment--when they sifted through all the possibilities and picked one specific name for their child, decided what they would call their baby. How could you kill something you cared enough to name? Gillian Flynn
84fbd70 Sometimes I feel like Nick has decided on a version of me that doesn't exist. Gillian Flynn
a12e600 I have a meanness inside of me, real as an organ. Gillian Flynn
108a015 The old Amy, the girl of the big laugh and the easy ways, literally shed herself, a pile of skin and soul on the floor, and stepped this new, brittle, bitter Amy ... a razor-wire knot daring me to unloop her, and I was not up to the job with my thick, numb, nervous fingers. Country fingers. Flyover fingers untrained in the intricate, dangerous work of 'solving Amy'. When I'd hold up the bloody stumps, she'd sigh and turn to her secret menta.. bullying change change-for-worse criticism emotional-turmoil failure flaws hatred heartbreak heartless hurtful i-miss-who-you-were loss love marriage missing-who-someone-was nothing puppeteer relationships scary strangers turmoil Gillian Flynn
2d77646 I felt hollowed out. My mom's death was not useful. I felt a shot of rage at her, and then imagined those last bloody moments in the house, when she realized it had gone wrong, when Debby lay dying, and it was all over, her unsterling life. My anger gave way to a strange tenderness, what a mother might feel for her child, and I thought, At least she tried. She tried, on that final day, as hard as anyone could have tried. And I would try to.. Gillian Flynn
4a3473a he's always been moody. Even when he was a baby he was like a cat. All snuggly one second and then the next, he'd be looking at you like he had no idea who you were. Gillian Flynn
8b9bc81 Do you understand this is serious?" "I understand you think it's serious." Gillian Flynn
d9b68dc How confusing to live in the shadow of a shadow. depression pain shadow Gillian Flynn
491923a One should never marry a man who doesn't own a decent set of scissors. That would be my advice. It leads to bad things. Gillian Flynn
ceeb62f She blew more smoke toward me, a lazy game of cancer catch. cigarette cigarettes death inevitable smoke smoking Gillian Flynn
1b47306 You stopped loving me. We're a sick, fucking toxic Mobius strip, Amy. We weren't ourselves when we fell in love, and when we became ourselves - surprise! - we were poison. We complete each other in the nastiest, ugliest possible way. You don't even really love me, Amy. You don't even like me. Divorce me. Divorce me, and let's try to be happy. Gillian Flynn
3712233 When a child knows that young that her mother doesn't care for her, bad things happen. Gillian Flynn
5dcd962 I don't feel like Nick's wife. I don't feel like a person at all: I am something to be loaded and unloaded, like a sofa or a cuckoo clock. I am something to be tossed into a junkyard, thrown into the river, if necessary. I don't feel real anymore. I feel like I could disappear. Gillian Flynn
76c762f She had what the Victorians would call . You could imagine the skull quite easily. I'd know her head anywhere. And what's inside it. I think of that, too: her mind. Her brain, all those coils, and her thoughts shuttling through those coils like fast, frantic centipedes. Like a child, I picture opening her skull, unspooling her brain and sifting through it, trying to catch and pin down her thoughts. Gillian Flynn
72238c9 Money is wasted on the rich. Gillian Flynn
985c1ab I like checking days off a calendar--151 days crossed and nothing truly horrible has happened. 152 and the world isn't ruined. 153 and I haven't destroyed anyone. 154 and no one really hates me. Sometimes I think I won't ever feel safe until I can count my last days on one hand. Three more days to get through until I don't have to worry about life anymore. Gillian Flynn
468258f It is always consoling to think of suicide; it's what gets one through many a bad night. death life suicide Gillian Flynn
dd99753 A lot of people lacked that gift: knowing when to fuck off. People love talking, and I have never been a huge talker. I carry on an inner monologue, but the words often don't reach my lips Gillian Flynn
c6ccc30 All the stuff I don't like about myself has been pushed to the back of my brain. Maybe that is what I like best about him, the way he makes me. Not makes me feel, just makes me. I am fun. I am playful. I am game. I feel naturally happy and entirely satisfied. Gillian Flynn