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ee6c577
|
No matter what she did with her hair it took about three minutes for it to tangle itself up again, like a garden hosepipe in a shed [Which, no matter how carefully coiled, will always uncoil overnight and tie the lawnmower to the bicycles].
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Terry Pratchett |
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2989a7c
|
They felt, in fact, tremendously bucked-up, which was how Lady Ramkin would almost certainly have put it and which was definitely several letters of the alphabet away from how they normally felt.
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Terry Pratchett |
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9d9f74b
|
You do know you could find yourself charged with being a dominant species while under the influence of impulse-driven consumerism, don't you?
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humour
humans
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Terry Pratchett |
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a77a0e1
|
William wondered why he always disliked people who said 'no offense meant.' Maybe it was because they found it easier to to say 'no offense meant' than actually to refrain from giving offense.
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Terry Pratchett |
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adbeb0e
|
IT'S THE EXPRESSION ON THEIR LITTLE FACES I LIKE, said the Hogfather. "You mean sort of fear and awe and not knowing whether to laugh or cry or wet their pants?" YES. NOW THAT IS WHAT I CALL BELIEF."
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Terry Pratchett |
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a412674
|
There's no point in believing in things that exist.
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Terry Pratchett |
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b4f575a
|
Cats gravitate to kitchens like rocks gravitate to gravity.
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humor
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Terry Pratchett |
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22d3ea3
|
She was convinced that she was anorexic, because every time she looked in the mirror she did indeed see a fat person.
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Terry Pratchett |
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253a094
|
Don't you understand?" snarled Rincewind. "We are going over the Edge, godsdammit!" "Can't we do anything about it?" "No!" "Then I can't see the sense in panicking," said Twoflower calmly."
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Terry Pratchett |
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afb6c2d
|
Modesty is only arrogance by stealth.
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modesty
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Terry Pratchett |
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0554516
|
I'm a witch. It's what we do. When it's nobody else's business, it's my business.
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Terry Pratchett |
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921d364
|
Colon thought Carrot was simple. Carrot often struck people as simple. And he was. Where people went wrong was thinking that simple meant the same thing as stupid.
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humour
stupidity
intelligence
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Terry Pratchett |
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89b71b8
|
Students, eh? Love 'em or hate 'em, you can't hit them with a shovel!
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ridcully
students
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Terry Pratchett |
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307fb4f
|
And so the children of the revolution were faced with the age-old problem: it wasn't that you had the wrong kind of government, which was obvious, but that you had the wrong kind of people. As soon as you saw people as things to be measured, they didn't measure up.
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people
political-revolutionary
revolutionary-movement
revolution
ideology
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Terry Pratchett |
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1d4b91b
|
People who are rather more than six feet tall and nearly as broad across the shoulders often have uneventful journeys. People jump out at them from behind rocks then say things like, "Oh. Sorry. I thought you were someone else."
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Terry Pratchett |
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4ecdf74
|
If you do not know where you come from, then you don't know where you are, and if you don't know where you are, then you don't know where you're going. And if you don't know where you're going, you're probably going wrong.
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self-assurance
direction
knowledge
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Terry Pratchett |
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0c1fe0b
|
And, as always happens, and happens far too soon, the strange and wonderful becomes a memory and a memory becomes a dream. Tomorrow it's gone.
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wonder
wisdom
memory
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Terry Pratchett |
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7c57961
|
OH, THERE HAS TO BE SOMETHING IN THE STOCKING THAT MAKES A NOISE, said Death. OTHERWISE, WHAT IS 4:30 A.M. FOR?
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noise
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Terry Pratchett |
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0c75fbb
|
He hated games they made the world look too simple. Chess, in particular, had always annoyed him. It was the dumb way the pawns went off and slaughtered their fellow pawns while the king lounged about doing nothing. If only the pawns would've united ... the whole board could've been a republic in about a dozen moves.
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Terry Pratchett |
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e711a1f
|
He felt that the darkness was full of unimaginable horrors - and the trouble with unimaginable horrors was that they were only too easy to imagine...
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Terry Pratchett |
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d59350e
|
Granny sighed. "You have learned something," she said, and thought it safe to insert a touch of sternness into her voice. "They say a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but it is not one half so bad as a lot of ignorance."
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Terry Pratchett |
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7f02aee
|
At such times the universe gets a little closer to us. They are strange times, times of beginnings and endings. Dangerous and powerful. And we feel it even if we don't know what it is. These times are not necessarily good, and not necessarily bad. In fact, what they are depends on what *we* are.
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terry-pratchett
witches
life
truth
inspirational
tiffany-aching
|
Terry Pratchett |
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9c647a4
|
All assassins had a full-length mirror in their rooms, because it would be a terrible insult to anyone to kill them when you were badly dressed.
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Terry Pratchett |
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1ef43e4
|
people didn't seem to be able to remember what it was like with the elves around. Life was certainly more interesting then, but usually because it was shorter. And it was more colorful, if you liked the color of blood.
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Terry Pratchett |
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d0f12a2
|
Night, forever. But within it, a city, shadowy and only real in certain ways. The entity cowered in its alley, where the mist was rising. This could not have happened! Yet it had. The streets had filled with... things. Animals! Birds! Changing shape! Screaming and yelling! And, above it all, higher than the rooftops, a lamb rocking back and forth in great slow motions, thundering over the cobbles... And then bars had come down, slamming d..
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Terry Pratchett |
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6c4aed0
|
Everywhere's been where it is ever since it was first put there. It's called geography.
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humour
humor
|
Terry Pratchett |
|
7104839
|
One of the hardest lessons in young Sam's life had been finding out that the people in charge weren't in charge. It had been finding out that governments were not, on the whole, staffed by people who had a grip, and that plans were what people made instead of thinking.
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Terry Pratchett |
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9179881
|
Oh, my dear Vimes, history changes all the time. It is constantly being re-examined and re-evaluated, otherwise how would we be able to keep historians occupied? We can't possibly allow people with their sort of minds to walk around with time on their hands.
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history
|
Terry Pratchett |
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a0bbc62
|
Cheery was aware that Commander Vimes didn't like the phrase 'The innocent have nothing to fear', believing the innocent had everything to fear, mostly from the guilty but in the longer term even more from those who say things like 'The innocent have nothing to fear'.
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commander
sam-vimes
innocent
|
Terry Pratchett |
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33f0ed0
|
This wasn't food - it was what food became if it had been good and gone to food heaven.
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Terry Pratchett |
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fc4c6bf
|
You just put that sword away, sir, please," said the voice of Lance-Constable Vimes. "You will not shoot me, you young idiot. That would be murder," said the captain calmly. "Not where I'm aiming, sir."
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humor
|
Terry Pratchett |
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fefcbd5
|
Verence would rather cut his own leg off than put a witch in prison, since it'd save trouble in the long run and probably be less painful.
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Terry Pratchett |
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4f1a42a
|
Never trust a species that grins all the time. It's up to something.
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humour
ulterior-motive
|
Terry Pratchett |
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a6ea47f
|
They'd smash up the world if they thought it would make a pretty noise.
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Terry Pratchett |
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e65e43f
|
His movements could be called cat-like, except that he did not stop to spray urine up against things.
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Terry Pratchett |
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a0b1b31
|
A witch who is bored might do ANYTHING. People said things like 'we had to make our own amusements in those days' as if this signified some kind of moral worth, and perhaps it did, but the last thing you wanted a witch to do was get bored and start making her own amusements, because witches sometimes had famously erratic ideas about what was amusing.
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Terry Pratchett |
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53300c8
|
It's amazing how good governments are, given their track records in almost every other field, at hushing up things like alien encounters. One reason may be that the aliens themselves are too embarrassed to talk about it. It's not known why most of the space-going races of the universe want to undertake rummaging in Earthling underwear as a prelude to formal contact. But representatives of several hundred races have taken to hanging out, un..
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Terry Pratchett |
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151ccfe
|
Peace?' said Vetinari. 'Ah, yes, defined as period of time to allow for preparation for the next war.
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war
|
Terry Pratchett |
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406ba4d
|
Dwarfs were not a naturally religious species, but in a world where pit props could crack without warning and pockets of fire damp could suddenly explode they'd seen the need for gods as the sort of supernatural equivalent of a hard hat. Besides, when you hit your thumb with an eight-pound hammer it's nice to be able to blaspheme. It takes a very special and strong-minded kind of atheist to jump up and down with their hand clasped under the..
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humour
funny
religion
|
Terry Pratchett |
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27f6c96
|
THERE's nO JUsTICE, THERE's JUsT ME. --Death
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Terry Pratchett |
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add018e
|
That's why it's always worth having a few philosophers around the place. One minute it's all is truth beauty and is beauty truth, and does a falling tree in the forest make a sound if there's no one there to hear it, and then just when you think they're going to start dribbling one of 'em says, incidentally, putting a thirty-foot parabolic reflector on a high place to shoot the rays of the sun at an enemy's ships would be a very interesting..
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Terry Pratchett |
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77a4761
|
WHERE'S MY COW?! IS THAT MY COW?! HRRRUUUUGGGH!!!!
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Terry Pratchett |
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78b7ddc
|
When she spoke again it was in the thin, careful and above all brave voice of someone who has pulled themselves together despite overwhelming odds but might let go again at any moment.
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Terry Pratchett |
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fd856a8
|
Jeremy tried to be an interesting person. The trouble was that he was the kind of person who, having decided to be an interesting person, would first of all try to find a book called How to Be An Interesting Person and then see whether there were any courses available.
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self-help
|
Terry Pratchett |