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Una de las claves para intensificar nuestra conexion con el estado de flujo consiste en sintonizar lo que hacemos con lo que nos gusta, como sucede en el caso de quienes tienen la inmensa fortuna de disfrutar de su trabajo. Las personas con exito son, independientemente del entorno considerado, las que han sabido dar con esa combinacion.
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Daniel Goleman |
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9d91d1e
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Our sense of well-being depends to some extent on others regarding us as a You; our yearning for connection is a primal human need, minimally for a cushion for survival. Today the neural echo of that need heightens our sensitivity to the difference between It and You--and makes us feel social rejection as deeply as physical pain.
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Daniel Goleman |
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Exploration means we disengage from a current focus to search for new possibilities, and allows flexibility, discovery,
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Daniel Goleman |
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Los sentimientos desempenan un papel fundamental para navegar a traves de la incesante corriente de las decisiones personales que la vida nos obliga a tomar.
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Daniel Goleman |
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52d30d5
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We're being judged by a new yardstick: not just by how smart we are, or by our training and expertise, but also by how well we handle ourselves and each other.
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Daniel Goleman |
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But amid the din and distraction of work life, poor listening has become epidemic.
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Daniel Goleman |
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It is with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye. ANTOINE DE SAINT-EXUPERY, The Little Prince
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Daniel Goleman |
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In any interaction the more high-power person tends to focus his or her gaze on the other person less than others, and is more likely to interrupt and to monopolize the conversation--all signifying a lack of attention.
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Daniel Goleman |
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76807d2
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Tightly focused attention gets fatigued--much like an overworked muscle--when we push to the point of cognitive exhaustion. The signs of mental fatigue, such as a drop in effectiveness and a rise in distractedness and irritability, signify that the mental effort needed to sustain focus has depleted the glucose that feeds neural energy.
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Daniel Goleman |
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eaae2d3
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no birthday, concert, hangout session, or party can be enjoyed without taking the time to distance yourself from what you are doing" to make sure that those in your digital world know instantly how much fun you are having."
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Daniel Goleman |
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11ae13e
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Academic intelligence has little to do with emotional life. The brightest among us can founder on the shoals of unbridled passions and unruly impulses; people with high IQs can be stunningly poor pilots of their private lives.
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Daniel Goleman |
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Rapport demands joint attention--mutual focus. Our need to make an effort to have such human moments has never been greater, given the ocean of distractions we all navigate daily.
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Daniel Goleman |
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e6dd259
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The inability to resist checking email or Facebook rather than focus on the person talking to us leads to what the sociologist Erving Goffman, a masterly observer of social interaction, called an "away," a gesture that tells another person "I'm not interested" in what's going on here and now."
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Daniel Goleman |
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c342376
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In fact, people who are extremely adept at mental tasks that demand cognitive control and a roaring working memory--like solving complex math problems--can struggle with creative insights if they have trouble switching off their fully concentrated focus.5
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Daniel Goleman |
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4bd9afa
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Emotional intelligence skills are synergistic with cognitive ones; top performers have both. The more complex the job, the more emotional intelligence matters--if only because a deficiency in these abilities can hinder the use of whatever technical expertise or intellect a person may have.
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Daniel Goleman |
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ed80ccb
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El recurso mas precioso de un ordenador no esta en su procesador, en su memoria, en su disco duro ni en la red, sino en la atencion humana>>, concluye un grupo de investigacion de la Universidad de Carnegie Mellon.
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Daniel Goleman |
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God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference.
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Daniel Goleman |
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the ability to monitor feelings from moment to moment is crucial to psychological insight and self-understanding. An
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Daniel Goleman |
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We typically avoid situations or fields in which we fear we might fail; even if we actually have the abilities it takes to succeed at a job, if we lack the belief that we can handle its challenges, we can start to act in ways that doom us. The thought "I can't do this" is crippling."
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Daniel Goleman |
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be1b066
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It demoralizes people just to hear that they are doing "something" wrong without knowing what the specifics are so they can change."
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Daniel Goleman |
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Ten muy presente que tu enfoque determina tu realidad>>.
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Daniel Goleman |
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Steve Jobs gave a heartfelt talk to a graduating class at Stanford University. His advice: "Don't let the voice of others' opinions drown out your inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become."3"
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Daniel Goleman |
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efa778b
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Great spiritual teachers, like Buddha and Jesus, have touched their disciples' hearts by speaking in the language of emotion, teaching in parables, fables, and stories. Indeed, religious symbol and ritual makes little sense from the rational point of view; it is couched in the vernacular of the heart.
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Daniel Goleman |
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fe6b87d
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In Japan, I learned the hard way that the moment of exchanging business cards signals an important ritual. We Americans are prone to casually pocketing the card without looking, which there indicates disrespect. I was told you should take the card carefully, hold it in both hands, and study it for a while before putting it away in a special case
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Daniel Goleman |
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aa90b37
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the worry habit is reinforcing in the same sense that superstitions are. Since people worry about many things that have a very low probability of actually occurring--a loved one dying in a plane crash, going bankrupt, and the like--there is, to the primitive limbic brain at least, something magical about it. Like an amulet that wards off some anticipated evil, the worry psychologically gets the credit for preventing the danger it obsesses a..
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Daniel Goleman |
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87d9c87
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Experience, particularly in childhood, sculpts the brain. The
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Daniel Goleman |
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and how toxic emotions put our physical health at as much risk as does chain-smoking, even as emotional balance can help protect our health and well-being.
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Daniel Goleman |
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The new measure takes for granted having enough intellectual ability and technical know-how to do our jobs; it focuses instead on personal qualities, such as initiative and empathy, adaptability and persuasiveness.
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Daniel Goleman |
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aaa2ca2
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Our journey begins in Part One with new discoveries about the brain's emotional architecture that offer an explanation of those most baffling moments in our lives when feeling overwhelms all rationality. Understanding the interplay of brain structures that rule our moments of rage and fear--or passion and joy--reveals
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Daniel Goleman |
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eb686fa
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Richard Davidson, a University of Wisconsin psychologist. He discovered that people who have greater activity in the left frontal lobe, compared to the right, are by temperament cheerful; they typically take delight in people and in what life presents them with, bouncing back from setbacks as my aunt June did. But those with relatively greater activity on the right side are given to negativity and sour moods, and are easily fazed by life's ..
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Daniel Goleman |
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Albert Bandura, a Stanford psychologist who has done much of the research on self-efficacy, sums it up well: "People's beliefs about their abilities have a profound effect on those abilities. Ability is not a fixed property; there is a huge variability in how you perform. People who have a sense of self-efficacy bounce back from failures; they approach things in terms of how to handle them rather than worrying about what can go wrong."24"
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Daniel Goleman |
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9a492ab
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Knowing one's emotions. Self-awareness--recognizing a feeling as it happens--is the keystone of emotional intelligence. As we will see in Chapter 4, the ability to monitor feelings from moment to moment is crucial to psychological insight and self-understanding. An inability to notice our true feelings leaves us at their mercy. People with greater certainty about their feelings are better pilots of their lives, having a surer sense of how t..
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Daniel Goleman |
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9cb4ce0
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People with well-developed emotional skills are also more likely to be content and effective in their lives, mastering the habits of mind that foster their own productivity; people who cannot marshal some control over their emotional life fight inner battles that sabotage their ability for focused work and clear thought. A
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Daniel Goleman |
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170655a
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The classical literature in psychology describes the relationship between anxiety and performance, including mental performance, in terms of an upside-down U. At the peak of the inverted U is the optimal relationship between anxiety and performance, with a modicum of nerves propelling outstanding achievement. But too little anxiety--the first side of the U--brings about apathy or too little motivation to try hard enough to do well, while to..
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Daniel Goleman |
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d6e0fca
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If you are a duffer at golf, say, and make the same mistakes every time you try a certain swing or putt, 10,000 hours of practicing that error will not improve your game. You'll still be a duffer, albeit an older one. No less an expert than Anders Ericsson, the Florida State University psychologist whose research on expertise spawned the 10,000-hour rule of thumb, told me, "You don't get benefits from mechanical repetition, but by adjusting..
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Daniel Goleman |
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8e55125
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An artful critique focuses on what a person has done and can do rather than reading a mark of character into a job poorly done. As Larson observes, "A character attack--calling someone stupid or incompetent--misses the point. You immediately put him on the defensive, so that he's no longer receptive to what you have to tell him about how to do things better."
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Daniel Goleman |
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89a87a1
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We have two brains, two minds--and two different kinds of intelligence: rational and emotional. How we do in life is determined by both--it is not just IQ, but emotional intelligence that matters. Indeed, intellect cannot work at its best without emotional intelligence. Ordinarily the complementarity of limbic system and neocortex, amygdala and prefrontal lobes, means each is a full partner in mental life. When these partners interact well..
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Daniel Goleman |
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This harkens back to Freud's famous question, "What does woman want?" As Epstein answers, "She wants a partner who cares what she wants."
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Daniel Goleman |
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When girls play together, they do so in small, intimate groups, with an emphasis on minimizing hostility and maximizing cooperation, while boys' games are in larger groups, with an emphasis on competition. One key difference can be seen in what happens when games boys or girls are playing get disrupted by someone getting hurt. If a boy who has gotten hurt gets upset, he is expected to get out of the way and stop crying so the game can go on..
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Daniel Goleman |
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Not that leaders need to be overly "nice"; the emotional art of leadership includes pressing the reality of work demands without unduly upsetting people."
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Daniel Goleman |
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f7bfaae
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Just seeing someone express an emotion can evoke that mood, whether you realize you mimic the facial expression or not. This happens to us all the time--there's a dance, a synchrony, a transmission of emotions. This mood synchrony determines whether you feel an interaction went well or not." The"
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Daniel Goleman |
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7b75aa7
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The creative mind is, by its very nature, a bit unruly. There is a natural tension between orderly self-control and the innovative urge. It's not that people who are creative are out-of-control emotionally; rather, they are willing to entertain a wider range of impulse and action than do less adventurous spirits. That is, after all, what creates new possibilities.
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Daniel Goleman |
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Add the sounds of silence to the list of emotional risks to health--and close emotional ties to the list of protective factors. Studies done over two decades involving more than thirty-seven thousand people show that social isolation--the sense that you have nobody with whom you can share your private feelings or have close contact--doubles the chances of sickness or death.37
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Daniel Goleman |
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7d3b35b
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And if there are any two moral stances that our times call for, they are precisely these, self-restraint and compassion.
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Daniel Goleman |