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| Link | Quote | Stars | Tags | Author |
| 385b45b | But none of that mattered, because I knew the truth, which is if someone really wants to see you, they always find a way. Always. That | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 0eb527e | The truth is, it's hard to get people to like you, but it's even harder to keep people liking you. You'd have to bring in Skittles every single day. The | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 724906e | Cinch together the whole look with a wide belt" was a very popular style in the early 2000s, which we believed accentuated our curves but in reality made a generation of women look like we were wearing lumbar support braces." | Mindy Kaling | ||
| b529a09 | Kevin's always saying things like "You've got a real deep bench, now, kid." Or "You gotta keep your eye on the ball, and you're going to push it over the goal line." And I have no idea what he is talking about, but I nod enthusiastically and say, "Sure, of course, sports," and hope he doesn't ask any follow-up questions." | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 4cae86a | If you got it, flaunt it. And if you don't got it, flaunt it. | life truth | Mindy Kaling | |
| 83eee35 | Work hard, know your shit, show your shit, and then feel entitled. Listen to no one except the two smartest and kindest adults you know, and that doesn't always mean your parents. If you do that, you will be fine. Now, excuse me, I need to lie down and watch Sheldon. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 9781e4b | My mother passed away in 2011. She was a warm and sociable person, but she did not suffer fools. In fact, that policy extended beyond fools. She did not suffer lazy people, pretentious people, liars, the sloppy, or the inarticulate. Basically she suffered very few people, and it was hard to earn her respect. But | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 3e2eec4 | I've attended some pretty glamorous events over the years, like the Costume Ball at the Met, the Golden Globes, and the Vanity Fair Oscar party. They are usually held at distinguished cultural institutions like the Met or the Annenberg Center--always beautiful spaces that are home to priceless works of art. The first thing they do when a Hollywood party rents out the place is push all the art to the corner so it doesn't get in the way. They.. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 199f372 | Eleven years into this, I am able to sleep through any amount of noise and temperature. Sometimes I wake up and hope I slept through a Walking Dead-type zombie apocalypse and I have to lead humans into a new world order. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 64d553c | Every winter, the Latin Club celebrated Saturnalia ... We wore togas ... and wreaths made out of pipe cleaners, and we had a feast of whole roast chickens and carbonated grape juice, which we ate with our hands, like the Romans. We toasted each other by saying "Io Saturnalia!" and pretended to be drunk emperors in the teachers' multipurpose room. You know, just the typical stuff you do when you are really cool in high school." | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 45b9c57 | Jocelyn is willowy and half-Asian, and while fitting the bill technically for a model, has no interest in modeling. She's just that cool. Me, on the other hand, whenever I lose, like, five pounds, I basically start considering if I should "try out" modeling." | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 66f6db3 | In my line of work, every man wears exactly one outfit: khakis, a Late Night with Jimmy Fallon T-shirt, and a hooded sweatshirt. If you don't wear that, people think you are a Scientologist and no one will eat lunch with you. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 29b8d07 | As it is, I guess I find "Jack & Diane" a little disgusting. As a child of immigrant professionals, I can't help but notice the wasteful frivolity of it all." -- | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 53340e2 | Anyone who knows me even slightly will recognize how unusual that is, since I am notorious for making impassioned speeches about things nobody cares about. Like, I think it's a federal crime parking meters won't accept pennies. Yeah, government, we know pennies suck. But you made them! You have to accept them! Parking meters are literally one of the three things anyone uses coins for and you decide you don't want to deal with them? OK, I to.. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| b31dffc | However, you should know I disagree with a lot of traditional advice. For instance, they say the best revenge is living well. I say it's acid in the face--who will love them now? Another old saying is that revenge is a dish best served cold. But it feels best served piping hot, straight out of the oven of outrage. My opinion? Take care of revenge right away. Push, shove, scratch that person while they're still within arm's reach. Don't let .. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 3c086ef | one got the other hooked on Breaking Bad and if either watches it without the other, they're dead meat. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 2b95bbf | Men know what they want. Men make concrete plans. Men own alarm clocks. Men sleep on a mattress that isn't on the floor. Men tip generously. Men buy new shampoo instead of adding water to a nearly empty bottle of shampoo. Men go to the dentist. Men make reservations. Men go in for a kiss without giving you some long preamble about how they're thinking of kissing you. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 83fe471 | Not getting Lasik at this point is like being that girl in 2006 who didn't have a cell phone. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| be611a1 | What I didn't need was some hot-and-cold long-distance flake wasting my time. It hurt my feelings and made me feel like something was wrong with me. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| e93d76c | In the genre of "making you feel like you're not having an awesome American high school experience," the worst offender is actually a song: John Cougar Mellencamp's "Jack & Diane." It's one of those songs--like Eric Clapton's "Tears in Heaven"--that everyone knows all the words to without ever having chosen to learn them." | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 8cfed23 | Then we'd leave and have our regular dinners at our respective homes. Obviously, the waiters loathed us. In a way we were worse than the dine-and-dashers because at least the dine-and-dashers only hit up Cheesecake Factory once and never showed up again. We, on the other hand, thought we were beloved regulars and that people lit up when we walked in. We're back, Cheesecake Factory! JLMP's back! Your favorite cool, young people here to jazz .. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| a83a7ec | This story didn't end in fireworks, because the truth is, fireworks are something from my twenties. I could have made fireworks, but I chose to make a nuanced memory of a person who is neither a hero nor a villain in my life. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| a047355 | Anyone who comes to visit the set of The Office always says the same thing when they leave: "Holy crap, that was scary!" This is because we shoot at the end of a dead-end street on an industrial block of Panorama City, in the San Fernando Valley, which sounds great--who doesn't love panoramas? But don't be fooled! The name is a trick. At one point Panorama City was part of Van Nuys, but Van Nuys did whatever the opposite of secede is to it... | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 4c97881 | Back then, we all thought Lever 2000 was the best because the number "2000" seemed so impressive. Were there 1999 formulas before they landed on this one? That sounds really well researched. I'm in!" | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 696547b | Cause that's all I want. A sweet, mature, normal, loving guy, with no baggage. And who has an absolutely enormous penis. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 4150be6 | I'm not one of those women who melts when a baby enters the room and immediately knows all the right age-specific questions to ask. I always assume the wrong things and offend someone. "Does he speak yet? Does what he says make sense, or is it still gurgle-babble?" Also, I'm always worried I'm going to accidentally scratch the kid with my fingernail or something. I'm the one who looks at the infant, smiles nervously, and as my contribution .. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 32af9e2 | All the humiliation was worth it for the one shining moment when Amy Poehler proposed we walk a few blocks together, late at night, in New York City in 2006. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 32aab32 | The Emmy announcements take place at 5:30 a.m., Pacific Standard Time, because when we are finding out the top six contenders for best miniseries, movie, or dramatic special, it's important that the whole nation watch as one. I woke up at two a.m. and drove to the Academy building in North Hollywood. Contrary to what you might think, North Hollywood is not in Hollywood, or even that close to it. It's in the Valley. Actually, North Hollywood.. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 73d9084 | If I can give one bit of advice to any drama major, high school theater kid, or inmate who is reading this in a prison library with dreams of being cast in he prison play, its this: write your own part. It is the only way I've gotten anywhere. It is much harder work, but sometimes you ave to take destiny into your own hands. | inspiration writing | Mindy Kaling | |
| 41f2527 | If I took the nicer subway, it meant I had to go through Manhattan every morning to get there, and that took a really long time. The subway line that ran the short way was the G line, which stopped exclusively in Brooklyn and Queens. That might be the only time the word exclusive has been used to describe the G train. | subway | Mindy Kaling | |
| 93a3d21 | It's traumatizing to think that a best friend could become just a friend. That's because there's virtually no difference between an acquaintance and a friend. But the gulf between a friend and a best friend is enormous and profound. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 3333da7 | There was no whimsical 'sip of wine at Thanksgiving' for us kids while we were still teenagers. This was the Clinton era, and my parents were already worried about the moral deterioration of the country. | politics | Mindy Kaling | |
| d6e8254 | The result of my not caring so much about what I say allows me to care more about how I say it. I think it makes my writing more personal and more enjoyable. If you're reading this, you're probably a woman. Or perhaps you're a gay man getting a present for your even gayer friend. Maybe you accidentally bought this thinking it was the Malala book. However this book made its way from the "Female Humor/Brave Minority Voices/Stress-free Summer .. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| c996e53 | He had some very specific notes he wanted me to address. The notes were about making sure that the character of Danny Castellano was strong and masculine. He didn't want my character to outsmart him and push him around. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| ff2549f | I have a comedy writer friend, Sandy, whose husband left her for another woman the moment his restaurant (which Sandy had invested in and made possible) became successful. It was kind of the worst story anyone had ever heard, a betrayal that, had it happened to me, I would've driven slowly around downtown Los Angeles at night in my car with my windows rolled down, trying to solicit a hit man to murder my husband. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| c33ac04 | Originally, in my pilot script, I had named my character Mira. But Kevin Reilly told me to change it to Mindy. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 133478b | But for years I just chose to never do any strength training because it seemed hard. It wasn't until a particularly disturbing night when I couldn't lift myself off the sofa because of lack of upper body strength that I decided it was time to see a trainer. I | Mindy Kaling | ||
| b0212f9 | In my heart, I believe that I am a passionate and intuitive cook who could make a five-course meal without even looking at a recipe. I feel I have the flash and charismatic personality of a famous chef, the fiery tenacity of Gordon Ramsay, and the soulful sexuality of Tom Colicchio. The problem is that I lack all basic skill. For instance, my dad had to come over to show me how to turn my oven on. It is sad when your hopes and your abilitie.. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 9157683 | Every couple of months or so, some boundary breaking article comes out in a nationally published magazine. The article makes a big thesis statement about relationships. Like say how, women don't need men anymore, or how if you're a woman over thirty-five, you should just settle with whatever guy is half-way nice to you, or how monogamy is not feasible, or plausible, or enjoyable, for any human. And we should all be swingers, or a study is r.. | honesty-quotes humor lifestyle mindy-kaling values | Mindy Kaling | |
| 6f2d235 | when you're winning, it makes them feel like they're losing or, worse yet, that maybe they should've tried to do something too, but now it's too late. And since they didn't, they want to stop you. You can't let them. | losing winning | Mindy Kaling | |
| 802393b | This ethereal weirdo abounds in movies, but nowhere else. If she were from real life, people would think she was a homeless woman and would cross the street to avoid her, but she is essential to the male fantasy that even if a guy is boring, he deserves a woman who will find him fascinating and pull him out of himself by forcing him to go skinny-dipping in a stranger's pool. THE | Mindy Kaling | ||
| c8d71fe | FAR SIDE: We know you're on Twitter. (Leaning in conspiratorially) And if you're willing to tweet about loving Sunshine Cupcakes, this cupcake (gesturing to the one I was buying) is free. I did not know it was possible to be triple offended. First of all, Manager Woman, if you notice that a thirty-two-year-old woman is coming to your cupcake bakery every day for a week, keep that information to yourself. I don't need to be reminded of how p.. | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 335ea4b | But basically, either way, you can't go wrong. I look at all of you and see America's future: attorneys, corporate lawyers, public prosecutors, judges, politicians, maybe even the president of the United States. Those are all positions of great influence. Understand that one day you will have the power to make a difference. Use it well. Thank | Mindy Kaling | ||
| 8ce7a28 | That's what I've noticed about being 32: it is a lot of women and a lot of boys our age. | relationships | Mindy Kaling |