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| Link | Quote | Stars | Tags | Author |
| 566452f | Por que encaramos os limites que as pessoas criam para si mesmas como desafios? Por que vemos algo que impoe um limite e o forcamos? | Roxane Gay | ||
| e5d0ffe | Nunca conhecerei nada alem disso. Nunca conhecerei nada melhor que isso. Ai, penso: Se eu sou realmente infeliz, se minha vida e realmente tao dificil, por que ainda nao faco nada? Com frequencia, eu me olho no espelho e tudo que consigo me perguntar e: Por que? O que sera preciso para que voce encontre forcas para mudar? | Roxane Gay | ||
| 5411c2b | There were a great many people in my own life who saw my body before they ever saw or considered me. | weight | Roxane Gay | |
| 69fdb77 | I could easily become a shut-in, hiding from the cruelty of the world. Most days it takes all my strength and no small amount of courage to get dressed and leave the house. | weight | Roxane Gay | |
| 176dc9e | When a black person behaves in a way that doesn't fit the dominant cultural ideal of how a black person should be, there is all kinds of trouble. The authenticity of his or her blackness is immediately called into question. We should be black but not too black, neither too ratchet nor too bougie. There are all manner of unspoken rules of how a black person should think and act and behave, and the rules are ever changing. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 485f21b | He was the first man who did not see through her. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 766b8b2 | There is nothing more desperate and unrequited than the love an unpopular girl nurtures for the cool kids. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 52be0f9 | I am learning to care less what other people think. I am learning that the measure of my happiness is not weight loss but, rather, feeling more comfortable in my body. | Roxane Gay | ||
| b184872 | I wish there were viable alternatives for students who would rather be anywhere but in a classroom. | Roxane Gay | ||
| df1a3e8 | I watch movies like Rosewood or The Help and realize that if I had been born to different parents, at a different time, I too could have been picking cotton or raising a white woman's babies for less than minimum wage or enduring any number of intolerable circumstances far beyond my control. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 69d2474 | People will always respond differently to the story of a sexually abused third grader than they will that of a young woman who is violated by a friend at a booze-soaked house party. There is a kind of fairness in that, since they are very different stories. Yet, in many ways, they are so intimately intertwined: they both rely on the belief in ownership of the vulnerable body, whether female or child or both. The idea that one violation is v.. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 66ba94f | Being useful was a balm. | Roxane Gay | ||
| c04a7fc | If I must share my story, I want to do so on my terms, without the attention that inevitably follows. I do not want pity or appreciation or advice. I am not brave or heroic. I am not strong. I am not special. I am one woman who has experienced something countless women have experienced. I am a victim who survived. It could have been worse, so much worse. That's what matters and is even more a travesty here, that having this kind of story is.. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 930db7b | Vivia sonhando acordada e detestava ser tirada dos meus sonhos para lidar com coisas como viver. | Roxane Gay | ||
| cc8268c | All too often, when we see injustices, both great and small, we think, That's terrible, but we do nothing. We say nothing. We let other people fight their own battles. We remain silent because silence is easier. Qui tacet consentire videtur is Latin for "Silence gives consent." When we say nothing, when we do nothing, we are consenting to these trespasses against us." -- | Roxane Gay | ||
| 0e6a179 | We need to end the system where it is only white men who decide when a woman--in any position, "privileged" or not--is deserving of power and agency." | Roxane Gay | ||
| af4a85b | No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted. | Aesop | ||
| 8b6caea | If readers discount certain topics as unworthy of their attention, if readers are going to judge a book by its cover or feel excluded from a certain kind of book because the cover is, say, pink, the failure is with the reader, not the writer. To read narrowly and shallowly is to read from a place of ignorance, and women writers can't fix that ignorance no matter what kind of books we write or how those books are marketed. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 62433c8 | Feminists are celebrating our victories and acknowledging our privilege when we have it. We're simply refusing to settle. We're refusing to forget how much work there is yet to be done. We're refusing to relish the comforts we have at the expense of the women who are still seeking comfort. | Roxane Gay | ||
| fb71f2f | It's hard not to feel humorless, as a woman and a feminist, to recognize misogyny in so many forms, some great and some small, and know you're not imagining things. It's hard to be told to lighten up because if you lighten up any more, you're going to float the fuck away. The problem is not that one of these things is happening; it's that they are all happening, concurrently and constantly. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 35f8845 | Over and over again we tell you it is acceptable for men--famous, infamous, or not at all famous--to abuse women. We look the other way. We make excuses. We reward these men for their bad behavior. We tell you that, as a young woman, you have little value or place in this society. Clearly we have sent these messages with such alarming regularity and consistency we have encouraged you to willingly run toward something violent and terrible wi.. | Roxane Gay | ||
| e89adea | I am a bad feminist because I never want to be placed on a Feminist Pedestal. People who are placed on pedestals are expected to pose, perfectly. Then they get knocked off when they fuck it up. Consider me already knocked off. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 75c94b2 | I'm more interested in a show called Grown Women about a group of friends who finally have great jobs and pay all their bills in a timely manner but don't have any savings and still deal with sloppy love lives and hangovers on Monday morning at work. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 16e5253 | What goes unsaid is that women might be more ambitious and focused because we've never had a choice. | Roxane Gay | ||
| dd64acf | Feminists are 'just women who don't want to be treated like shit. | Roxane Gay | ||
| f49f521 | Good feminists don't fear the sisterhood because they know they are comporting themselves in sisterhood-approved ways. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 733d319 | In literature, as in life, the rules are all too often different for girls. There are many instances in which an unlikable man is billed as an antihero, earning a special term to explain those ways in which he deviates from the norm, the traditionally likable. | Roxane Gay | ||
| b07edc1 | I wanted him to fill the loneliness, to ease the ache of being awkward, of being the girl always on the outside looking in. | Roxane Gay | ||
| d2ac1dd | Many feminist communities use trigger warnings, particularly in online forums when discussing rape, sexual abuse, and violence. By using these warnings, these communities are saying, "This is a safe space. We will protect you from unexpected reminders of your history." Members of these communities are given the illusion they can be protected." | Roxane Gay | ||
| 909cd31 | When I read the books, though, I could pretend that a better life was possible for me, one where I fit in somewhere, anywhere, and I had friends and a handsome boyfriend and a loving family who knew everything about me. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 026ad20 | Life, apparently, requires a trigger warning. This is the uncomfortable truth: everything is a trigger for someone. There are things you cannot tell just by looking at someone. We all have history. You can think you're over your history. You can think the past is the past. And then something happens, often innocuous, that shows you how far you are from over it. The past is always with you. Some people want to be protected from this | Roxane Gay | ||
| e63a6b8 | It has been suggested, more than once, that if you don't believe in trigger warnings, you aren't respecting the experiences of rape and abuse survivors. It has been suggested, more than once, that trigger warnings are unnecessary coddling. It is an impossible debate. There is too much history lurking beneath the skin of too many people. Few are willing to consider the possibility that trigger warnings might be ineffective, impractical, and .. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 170fa0c | Trigger warnings aren't meant for those of us who don't believe in them, just like the Bible wasn't written for atheists. Trigger warnings are designed for the people who need and believe in that safety. Those of us who do not believe should have little say in the matter. We can neither presume nor judge what others might feel the need to be protected from. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 24d1e6f | She didn't mind that my father was married and had a kid. She never expected much from him. She was the kind of woman who didn't expect much from life. They were well suited. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 492fd5a | It is hard to write about happy things when you can never escape the kind of cold that sinks into your bones and stays there. I am in Siberia, I decide. I am comforted by thoughts of exile, cold solace, meditation, and inspiration born of emotional deprivation. It is all very dramatic. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 0be5878 | The word comes from the Latin word , to hunt. I find that cruel, to name something for that end which comes to pass. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 1d1d09b | Mon corps est une cage. Mon corps est une que que je me suis fabriquee. Je suis encore en train de rechercher le moyen de m'en echapper. | cage citation corps échapper hunger quote roxane-gay | Roxane Gay | |
| 2d702e0 | Because I have so many deeply held opinions about gender equality, I feel a lot of pressure to live up to certain ideals. I am supposed to be a good feminist who is having it all, doing it all. Really, though, I'm a woman in her thirties struggling to accept herself and her credit score. For so long I told myself I was not this woman--utterly human and flawed. I worked overtime to be anything but this woman, and it was exhausting and unsust.. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 665fc09 | What I remind myself, regularly, is this: the acknowledgement of my privilege is not a denial of the ways I have been marginalized, the ways I have suffered. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 47d1bdb | He was so kind to me and never wanted anything from me but friendship. That was something of a revelation to me, that a young man could be kind. | Roxane Gay | ||
| f6fec3f | 7. Surround yourself with women you can get sloppy drunk with who won't draw stupid things on your face if you pass out, and who will help you puke if you overcelebrate, and who will also tell you if you get sloppy drunk too much or behave badly when you are sloppy drunk. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 2927d50 | so she may know that she, in turn, will always be loved. It is important to show a child love in many forms, and this is the one good thing I have to offer, no matter how this child comes into my life. | Roxane Gay | ||
| 89b27d7 | Sometimes, when students are doing group work, I sneak a look at my own phone like I am in a cone of invisibility. I am part of the problem. | Roxane Gay | ||
| def5865 | excuses | Roxane Gay |