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When I first joined Facebook, I was working with a team to answer the critical question of how best to grow our business. The conversations were getting heated, with many people arguing their own positions strongly. We ended the week without consensus. Dan Rose, leader of our deal team, spent the weekend gathering market data that allowed us to reframe the conversation in analytics. His effort broke the logjam. I then expanded Dan's respons..
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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SOMETIMES I WONDER what it would be like to go through life without being labeled by my gender. I don't wake up thinking, What am I going to do today as Facebook's female COO?, but that's often how I'm referred to by others. When people talk about a female pilot, a female engineer, or a female race car driver, the word "female" implies a bit of surprise."
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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It's a cliche, but opportunities are rarely offered; they're seized.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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As the graduates were called to the stage to collect their diplomas, I shook every hand. Many stopped to give me a hug. One young woman even told me I was "the baddest bitch" (which, having checked with someone later, actually did turn out to be a compliment)."
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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What would you do if you weren't afraid?
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self-help-women
women
inspirational
business
career
self-help
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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I thought (...) the proverbial glass ceiling had been cracked (...) and I believed that it was just a matter of time until my generation took our fair share of the leadership roles.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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It is time for us to face that our revolution has stalled.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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To this day, I'm embarrassed that I didn't realize that pregnant women needed reserved parking until I experienced my own aching feet. As one of Google's most senior women, didn't I have a special responsibility to think of this?
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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In addition to the external barriers erected by society, women are hindered by barriers that exist within ourselves. We hold ourselves back in ways both big and small, by lacking self-confidence, by not raising our hands, and by pulling back when we should be leaning in. We internalize the negative messages we get throughout our lives--the messages that say it's wrong to be outspoken, aggressive, more powerful than men. We lower our own exp..
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Our entrenched cultural ideas associate men with leadership qualities and women with nurturing qualities and put women in a double bind," she said. "We believe not only that women are nurturing, but that they should be nurturing above all else. When a woman does anything that signals she might not be nice first and foremost, it creates a negative impression and makes us uncomfortable."
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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The pipeline that supplies the educated workforce is clock-full of women at the entry level, but by the time that same pipeline is filling leadership positions, it is overwhelmingly stocked with men.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Men at the top are often unaware of the benefits they enjoy simply because they're men, and this can make them blind to the disadvantages associated with being a woman. Women lower down also believe that men at the top are entitled to be there, so they try to play by the rules and work harder to advance rather than raise questions or voice concerns about the possibility of bias. As a result, everyone becomes complicit in perpetuating an unj..
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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This phenomenon of capable people being plagued by self-doubt has a name---the impostor syndrome.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Because the vast majority of leaders are men, it is not possible to generalize from any one example. But the dearth of female leaders causes one woman to be viewed as representative of her entire gender. And because people often discount and dislike female leaders, these generalizations are often critical. This is not just unfair to the individuals but reinforces the stigma that successful women are unlikeable.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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All of us --men and women alike-- have to understand and acknowledge how stereotypes and biases cloud our beliefs and perpetuate the status quo.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Anyone who wants her mate to be a true partner must treat him as an equal--and equally capable--partner. And if that's not reason enough, bear in mind that a study found that wives who engage in gatekeeping behaviors do five more hours of family work per week than wives who take a more collaborative approach.9
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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once a woman achieves success, particularly in a gender-biased context, her capacity to see gender discrimination is reduced.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Men of all ages must commit to changing the leadership ratios. They can start by actively seeking out qualified female candidates to hire and promote. And if qualified candidates cannot be found, then we need to invest in more recruiting, mentoring, and sponsoring so women can get the necessary experience.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Bill like a man.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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nurturing qualities and put women in a double bind," she said. "We believe not only that women are nurturing, but that they should be nurturing above all else. When a woman does anything that signals she might not be nice first and foremost, it creates a negative impression and makes us uncomfortable."
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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When I first started working for Larry Summers, then chief economist at the World Bank, he was married to a tax attorney, Vicki. He was very supportive of Vicki's career and used to urge her to "bill like a boy." His view was that the men considered any time they spent thinking about an issue--even time in the shower--as billable hours. His wife and her female colleagues, however, would decide that they were not at their best on a given day..
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Men have an easier time finding the mentors and sponsors who are invaluable for career progression.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Blaming our actions rather than our character allows us to feel guilt instead of shame.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Free to Be . . . You and Me
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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sharing financial and child-care responsibilities leads to less guilty moms, more involved dads, and thriving children.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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We need to stop telling them, "Get a mentor and you will excel." Instead, we need to tell them, "Excel and you will get a mentor." Clara"
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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As Helen Keller put it, "When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us." For"
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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In sports, taking suggestions from a coach is the whole point of practice. Adam traces his openness to feedback to his past as a Junior Olympic diver. Criticism was the only way to get better.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Don't enter the workforce already looking for the exit. Don't put on the brakes. Accelerate. Keep a foot on the gas pedal until a decision must be made. That's the only way to ensure that when that day comes, there will be a real decision to make.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Grief," she writes, is "a whisper in the world and a clamor within. More than sex, more than faith, even more than its usher death, grief is unspoken, publicly ignored except for those moments at the funeral that are over too quickly." - Sandberg sharing Anna Quindlen's take on how society conceals grief"
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Survivor guilt is a thief of joy--yet another secondary loss from death.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Resilience comes from deep within us and from support outside us. It comes from gratitude for what's good in our lives and from leaning in to the suck.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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One of my favorite quotes comes from author Alice Walker, who observed, "The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any."
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Resilience is the strength and speed of our response to adversity--and we can build it. It isn't about having a backbone. It's about strengthening the muscles around our backbone.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Reverend Veronica Goines sums this up as, "Peace is joy at rest, and joy is peace on its feet."
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Resilience is not just built in individuals. It is built among individuals--in our neighborhoods, schools, towns, and governments. When we build resilience together, we become stronger ourselves and form communities that can overcome obstacles and prevent adversity. Collective resilience requires more than just shared hope--it is also fueled by shared experiences, shared narratives, and shared power.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Wanting to improve is not a sign of weakness.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Resilience is the strength and speed of our response to adversity--and
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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When you're faced with tragedy,18 you usually find that you're no longer surrounded by people--you're surrounded by platitudes.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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In many cases, women need to be more open to taking risks in their careers.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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It turns out that people who choose to be single are very satisfied with their lives. "Singles are stereotyped, stigmatized, and ignored," psychologist Bella DePaulo finds, "and still live happily ever after."
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Despite being high achievers, even experts in their fields, women can't seem to shake the sense that it is only a matter of time until they are found out for who they really are--impostors with limited skills or abilities.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Fear is at the root of so many of the barriers that women face. Fear of not being liked. Fear of making the wrong choice. Fear of drawing negative attention. Fear of overreaching. Fear of being judged. Fear of failure. And the holy trinity of fear: the fear of being a bad mother/wife/daughter. Without fear, women can pursue professional success and personal fulfillment--and freely choose one, or the other, or both.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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Poetry, philosophy, and physics all teach us that we don't experience time in equal increments.
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Sheryl Sandberg |