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3036e08
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The ability to learn is the most important quality a leader can have.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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d03d3c8
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What is your biggest problem, and how can I solve it?
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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9664125
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Anyone lucky enough to have options should keep them open. Don't enter the workforce already looking for the exit. Don't put on the breaks. Accelerate. Keep a foot on the gas pedal until a decision must be made. That's the only way to ensure that when that day comes, there will be a real decision to make.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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aa18d1a
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All over the world, there is cultural pressure to conceal negative emotions. In China and Japan, the ideal emotional state is calm and composed.10 In the United States, we like excitement (OMG!) and enthusiasm (LOL!). As psychologist David Caruso observes, "American culture demands that the answer to the question 'How are you?' is not just 'Good.'11 ... We need to be 'Awesome.' " Caruso adds, "There's this relentless drive to mask the expre..
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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05d9a3f
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It bothered me because like most people who have choices, I am not completely comfortable with mine.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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669ab82
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We find our humanity--our will to live and our ability to love--in our connections to one another.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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14bb2c4
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Fear is at the root of so many of the barriers that women face. Fear of not being liked. Fear of making the wrong choice. Fear of drawing negative attention. Fear of overreaching. Fear of being judged. Fear of failure. And the holy trinity of fear: the fear of being a bad mother/wife/daughter.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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5a1b1ab
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intelligence and success are not clear paths to popularity at any age. This complicates everything, because at the same time women need to...own their success, doing so causes them to be liked less.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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7fd26d6
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Larry said he could understand the complaint, but what he did not understand was that all the people who quit - every single one - had unused vacation time. Up until the day they left, they did everything McKinsey asked of them before deciding that it was too much. Larry implored us to exert more control over our careers. He said McKinsey would never stop making demands on our time, so it was up to us to decide what we were willing to do. I..
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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5cdd726
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Anyone who brings up gender in the workplace is wading into deep and muddy waters. The subject itself presents a paradox, forcing us to acknowledge differences while trying to achieve the goal of being treated the same.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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73a31e9
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Still, my argument was that if she was going to work for the next thirty years, what difference does going "back" four years really make? If the other path made her happier and offered her a chance to learn new skills, that meant she was actually moving forward."
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career-paths
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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4fcaa3e
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For many men, the fundamental assumption is that they can have both a successful professional life and a fulfilling personal life. For many women, the assumption is that trying to do both is difficult at best and impossible at worst.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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fb7bee1
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The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any.
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inspirational
power
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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efbcc87
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The ability to listen is as important as the ability to speak.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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eaaac5b
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A traumatic experience is a seismic event that shakes our belief in a just world, robbing us of the sense that life is controllable, predictable, and meaningful.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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35bb743
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A 2011 McKinsey report noted that men are promoted based on potential, while women are promoted based on past accomplishments.
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women
work
glass-ceiling
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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fa65ff0
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Leadership is about making others better as a result of your presence and making sure that impact lasts in your absence.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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cc551a9
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He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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3f7d11d
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No wonder women don't negotiate as often as men. It's like trying to cross a minefield backward in high heels.
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women
negotiating
salary
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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e445d24
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That even in the face of the most shocking tragedy of my life, I could exert some control over its impact.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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4ac3bea
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Psychologists have found that over time we usually regret the chances we missed, not the chances we took.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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395d064
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We also all know people who could do so much more if only they believed in themselves. Like so many things, a lack of confidence can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. I don't know how to convince anyone to believe deep down that she is the best person for the job, not even myself.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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36f2a2f
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If I had to embrace a definition of success, it would be that success is making the best choices we can . . . and accepting them.
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success
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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a4bfc02
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When a woman excels at her job, both male and female coworkers will remark that she may be accomplishing a lot, but is "not well-liked by her peers." She is probably also "too aggressive," "not a team player," "a bit political," "can't be trusted," or "difficult."
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workplace-attitudes
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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9085af4
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At a small dinner with other business executives, the guest of honor spoke the entire time without taking a breath. This meant that the only way to ask a question or make an observation was to interrupt. Three or four men jumped in, and the guest politely answered their questions before resuming his lecture. At one point, I tried to add something to the conversation and he barked, "Let me finish! You people are not good at listening!" Event..
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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80df822
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When children feel comfortable asking for help, they know they matter. They see that others care and want to be there for them. They understand that they are not alone and can gain some control by reaching out for support. They realize that pain is not permanent; things can get better.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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81602bb
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Real change will come when powerful women are less of an exception.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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567c02a
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One of the conflicts inherent in having choice is that we all make different ones. There is always an opportunity cost, and I don't know any woman who feels comfortable with all her decisions. As a result, we inadvertently hold that discomfort against those who remind us of the path not taken. Guilt and insecurity make us second-guess ourselves and, in turn, resent one another.'
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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94de104
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These aren't personal questions. They are human questions,
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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e0fc74b
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Avoiding feelings isn't the same as protecting feelings.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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d1039a7
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You can't do it all. No one can have two full-time jobs, have perfect children and cook three meals and be multi-orgasmic 'til dawn ... Superwoman is the adversary of the women's movement."5"
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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aad01b5
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Trying to do it all and expecting it all can be done exactly right is a recipe for disappointment. Perfection is the enemy. Gloria Steinem said it best: 'You can't do it all. No one can have two full-time jobs, have perfect children and cook three meals and be multi-orgasmic 'til dawn... Superwoman is the adversary of the women's movement.'
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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b1c2b37
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It's a jungle gym, not a ladder.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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cfb6b63
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counting our blessings doesn't boost our confidence or our effort, but counting our contributions can.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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0dcd922
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hold ourselves back in ways both big and small, by lacking self-confidence, by not raising our hands, and by pulling back when we should be leaning in. We internalize the negative messages we get throughout our lives--the messages that say it's wrong to be outspoken, aggressive, more powerful than men.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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2997a04
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But knowing that things could be worse should not stop us from trying to make them better. When the suffragettes marched in the streets, they envisioned a century later, men and women would be truly equal. A century later, we are still squinting, trying to bring that vision into focus.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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2126057
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In order to protest ourselves from being disliked, we question our abilities and downplay our achievements, especially in the presence of others. We put ourselves down before others can.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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51df7d5
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My coworkers should understand that I need to go to a party tonight--and this is just as legitimate as their kids' soccer game--because going to a party is the only way I might actually meet someone and start a family so I can have a soccer game to go to one day!
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work-life-balance
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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b7e43a7
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You have to take opportunities and make an opportunity fit for you, rather than the other way around.
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opportunities
inspirational
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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c1ba9c1
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An internal report at Hewlett-Packard revealed that women only apply for open jobs if they think they meet 100 percent of the criteria listed. Men apply if they think they meet 60 percent of the requirements.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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70c00a8
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Aggressive and hard-charging women violate unwritten rules about acceptable social conduct. Men are continually applauded for being ambitious and powerful and successful, but women who display these same traits often pay a social penalty. Female accomplishments come at a cost.17
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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0be6d8c
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Imagine that a career is like a marathon--a long, grueling, and ultimately rewarding endeavor. Now imagine a marathon where both men and women arrive at the starting line equally fit and trained. The gun goes off. The men and women run side by side. The male marathoners are routinely cheered on: "Lookin' strong! On your way!" But the female runners hear a different message. "You know you don't have to do this!" the crowd shouts. Or "Good st..
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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cdc5d43
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Shutting down discussion is self-defeating and impedes progress. We need to talk and listen and debate and refute and instruct and learn and evolve.
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Sheryl Sandberg |
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a17e208
|
Still, my argument was that if she was going to work for the next 30 years, what difference does "going back" 4 years really make? If the other path made her happier and offered her a chance to learn new skills, that meant she was actually moving forward."
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women
lean-in
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Sheryl Sandberg |