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0516112
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Its always nice to have a stud muffin at the table.
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Janet Evanovich |
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6030758
|
I looked over at him. "Is that a proposal?" There was total silence for a couple beats. "I'm not sure. It just popped out." "Let me know when you're sure." "Would you say yes?" Morelli asked. "I'm not sure."
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Janet Evanovich |
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2997c10
|
Are you afraid of me? Uh... yes.' The smile stayed fixed in place. 'You should be. You locked me in a refrigerator truck with three dead people. Sooner or later I'm going to get you for it.
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Janet Evanovich |
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e043fd6
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He [Ranger] peeled my [Stephanie] clothes off and wrangled me into bed. And then suddenly he was inside me. He once told me that time spent with him would ruin me for all other men. When he said it, I thought it was an outrageous threat. I no longer though it outrageous.
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romance
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Janet Evanovich |
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8366cb7
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You think I'm gonna feel better eatin' a carrot? Get a grip. There's two idiots out there trying to kill me, and you think I'm gonna waste my last breath on a vegetable? (Lula)
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Janet Evanovich |
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8d3604d
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Ranger sent us to check on you," Hal said. "We just got here, and we heard shots." "Some moron ate my jelly doughnut," Lula said. "So I shot him."
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Janet Evanovich |
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122160f
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Babe,' Ranger said. 'Do something with her.' And he disconnected. I called Ranger back. 'No,' I said. 'And I need information on Jelly Kantner. His apartment got blown up, and I need to find him.' And I should do this why?' Because you like me.' There was a full beat of silence. 'I do,' Ranger said. 'I like you a lot. Sometimes I'm not sure why. Give me a couple minutes.
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Janet Evanovich |
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29efe26
|
I checked my phone messages. Three in all. The first was from Joe. "Hey, Cupcake." That was it. That was the whole message. The second was from Ranger. "Yo." Ranger made Joe look like a chatterbox."
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Janet Evanovich |
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e0af943
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When I was six years old I sprinkled sugar on my head, convinced myself it was pixie dust, wished myself invisible, and walked into the boys' bathroom at school.
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stephanie-plum
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Janet Evanovich |
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0cacb60
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I wasn't a fabulous cook. I didn't have a boyfriend, much less a husband. And I wasn't a big financial success. I could live with all those failings as long as I knew that once in a while I looked really hot.
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Janet Evanovich |
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980c74e
|
Ranger] "How's your mental health?" he asked. "I heard about Soder." [Stephanie] "I'm rattled." "I have a cure." Oh, boy. He put the truck in gear and headed for the exit. "I know what you're thinking," he said. "And that wasn't where I was going. I was going to suggest work." "I knew that."
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romance
ranger
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Janet Evanovich |
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f8039b9
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Give me the gun." Ranger said. I extracted the gun from my pants and handed it over. Ranger held the gun in the pulm of his hand and smiled. "It's warm," he said. He put the gun in the glove compartment and plugged the key into the ignition. Am I fired?" No. Any women who can heat up a gun like that is worth keeping around."
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Janet Evanovich |
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4add14a
|
Mooner was walking around laying his hands on the cars, divining karma. "this is it", he said, standing by a small khaki-colored jeep."this car has protective qualities" You mean like a guardian angel?" I mean, like, it has seatbelts"
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Janet Evanovich |
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6f63b5e
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Ranger was grinning. "Somebody beat the shit out of this guy before he got shot." "That would be me."I said. "Babe,"Ranger said, the grin widening."
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ranger
stephanie-plum
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Janet Evanovich |
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5df8d95
|
I failed math twice, never fully grasping probability theory. I mean, first off, who cares if you pick a black ball or a white ball out of the bag? And second, if you're bent over about the color, don't leave it to chance. Look in the damn bag and pick the color you want.
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Janet Evanovich |
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3d9f32b
|
I always wanted to eat with a Negro," Grandma said. Yeah, well I always wanted to eat with a boney-assed old white woman," Lula said. "So I guess this works out good."
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thriller
mystery
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Janet Evanovich |
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9bb55f6
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It's a penis,' Grandma said. 'Stephanie got it in the mail. It's a pretty good one too.
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Janet Evanovich |
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96f64aa
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One Ranger is all you'll ever need. - Ranger
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Janet Evanovich |
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193d054
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Everyone wants a Christmas tree. If you had a Christmas tree Santa would bring you stuff! Like hair curlers and slut shoes.
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humor
diesel
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Janet Evanovich |
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2f2bbe0
|
Fine. Let Ranger get someone else. Trust me, you don't want to be out looking for a parking place on Sloane in the middle of the night." "I won't have to look for a parking place. Tank's picking me up." "Your working with a guy name Tank?" "He's big." "Jesus", Morelli said. "I had to fall in love with a woman who works with a guy named Tank." "You love me?" "Of course I love you. I just don't want to marry you."
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stephine
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Janet Evanovich |
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27ce582
|
I need mood music. I gotta get myself ready to kick butt." Lula - High Five"
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Janet Evanovich |
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78511ea
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My grandmother is a little Cuban woman who cooks all day and speaks Spanish. Your grandmother watches pay-per-view porn." "She used to watch the Weather Channel, but she said there wasn't enough action." -Ranger and Stephanie"
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ranger
janet-evanovich
stephanie-plum
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Janet Evanovich |
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8ecca93
|
I met a real looker. He picked me up at the two dollar slot machines, so you know he's no cheapskate." Grandma Mazur"
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Janet Evanovich |
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a705ba3
|
That's nice of you, but it's not necessary to loan me a car." "I loan you cars all the time." "And I almost always destroy them or lose them. I have terrible luck with cars." "Working at Rangeman is a high-stress job, and you're one of our few sources of comic relief. I give you a car and my men start a pool on how long it will take you to trash it. You're a line item in my budget under entertainment."
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Janet Evanovich |
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51f7a23
|
You're going to find this hard to believe, but cops aren't required to carry emergency condoms." Joe Morelli" --
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Janet Evanovich |
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80fa231
|
He's a good man," Ranger said. "And you?" "I'm better."
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Janet Evanovich |
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044433e
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To celebrate our partnership I dressed up like Ranger. Black boots, black jeans, black turtleneck, small silver hoop earrings. He gave me the once-over when I opened the door to him. 'Smart ass,' he said.
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Janet Evanovich |
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6838780
|
My father would eat cat shit if it was salted, fried, or frosted, but it took an act of Congress to get him to eat a vegetable.
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Janet Evanovich |
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28bc074
|
Oh, for God's sake," I said. "Just give me the stupid thing." I took the panic button and stuck it into my Super Sexy Miracle Bra. "GPS," Ranger said to Morelli. "Probably I can find her breast without it," Morelli said. "But it's good to know there's a navigational system on board if I need it."
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navigational-devices
sexy
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Janet Evanovich |
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80f7956
|
I have bad car juju." -Stephanie Plum"
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Janet Evanovich |
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01c8bf4
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There's me and then there's you, and you aren't ever going to be as good as me, Sweet Thing." Ranger"
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Janet Evanovich |
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83bc5d6
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Okay, take a deep breath, I told myself. Don't go all hormonal. Get the facts straight. Have a mental doughnut.
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women
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Janet Evanovich |
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6002694
|
Why do you give me cars?" "It's fun," Ranger said."And it keeps you safe. Do you want to know why keeping you safe is important to me?" "You love me?" "Yes." A sigh inadvertently escaped. "We're really screwed up, aren't we?" "In a very large way," Ranger said."
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sizzling-sixteen
stephanie-plum
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Janet Evanovich |
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71ff0ae
|
Ranger clicked his penlight on. "Hang onto me if you can't see." I curled my hand into the back of his cargo pants just above his gun belt. "I'm good to go." He was still for a beat. "You could have held on to my jacket," he said. "Would you rather I do that?" "No. Not even a little."
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stephanie
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Janet Evanovich |
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bab47ff
|
Nothing Personal? You've harrassed my mother, stolen my car, and now you're telling people I've gotten you pregnant! In my opinion, getting someone pregnant is pretty fucking personal! Jesus, isn't it enough I'm accused of murder? What are you the bounty hunter from hell?
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Janet Evanovich |
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da25fa7
|
Yeah. Almost as surprising as when you nailed me with your father's car." In the interest of avoiding confrontation, I felt compelled to explain. I didn't feel obliged to do it convincingly. "It was an accident. My foot slipped." "That was no accident. You jumped the goddamn curb and followed me down the sidewalk."
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stephanie-plum
|
Janet Evanovich |
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7c8ff37
|
Omigod,' I said on a sudden flash of sleep-deprived insight. 'You're the big bad wolf.' There are some similarities.
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Janet Evanovich |
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63d185b
|
Last time you called me late at night you were naked and chained to your shower curtain rod. I hope this isn't going to be disappointing.
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stephanie-plum
|
Janet Evanovich |
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ba69933
|
You'd tell me if we were getting married, wouldn't you? I mean, you wouldn't just appear on my doorstep one day and say we were due at the church in an hour.
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Janet Evanovich |
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d8e2118
|
Diesel is back," Ranger said. Yes. How did you know?" I woke up with a migraine this morning." Ranger said."
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Janet Evanovich |
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93f948c
|
Bitch." "Slut." "Whore." "Cunt." I kicked Joyce in the shin. I draw the line at cunt."
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slut
whore
cunt
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Janet Evanovich |
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5e63b90
|
He squinted at me. "What are you wearing? Is that some new form of birth control?"
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randy-briggs
|
Janet Evanovich |
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08f8165
|
You deserved to get run over. And besides, I barely tapped you. The only reason you broke your leg was because you panicked and tripped over your own feet.
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Janet Evanovich |
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5adf96e
|
Stephanie,' Valerie said. 'She's going to have a baby, and she's getting married.' My father was confused. He looked around the room. No Joe. No Ranger. His eyes locked on Diesel. 'Not the psycho,' he said. Diesel blew out a sigh. My father turned to my mother. 'Get me the carving knife. Make sure it's sharp.
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Janet Evanovich |