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"I love acronyms, don't you? They are quick and easy tools for remembering important lessons that are too good to forget. The PEACE acronym goes straight to the heart of the matter for delivering "Service Beyond Self." When you do this one thing, you will increase your opportunities, earn loyalty and respect, and rock your first and last impressions. Persistently Exceed All Customer Expectations" --
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Our cultural lens is so much a part of us that we are not even aware of how obvious it is to others. Like the nose on your face, you may forget that it is there, but everyone else sees it. I can't look at you and not see your nose.
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Susan C. Young |
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A lack of engagement sends the message that you may not care, are not interested, are too busy, or that the other person does not matter to you. Even though this is rarely your intention, it can happen when you're not being mindful and deliberate to connect in the moment.
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Susan C. Young |
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Why Polish the Gold? * It builds your confidence when you realize that your words have power and can positively influence. * As you seek to find the good in others, you will enjoy the ripple effect reminder for finding the good in yourself. * It makes a great ice-breaker to begin a conversation. * It helps you meet new people and make new friends. * It strengthens your relationships and builds mutual admiration. * It brings more happiness and joy into your life. * A little praise goes a long way to make others happy.
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Susan C. Young |
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"Service [sur-vis] noun 1. the act of helping, aiding, or doing work for another. "Does this dictionary definition sound simplistic? Well, it is foundational to delivering world-class, game-changing service. Did you notice it didn't mention you? True service takes the focus completely off you and devotes it entirely to the needs of another person."
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Susan C. Young |
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"At a Chamber of Commerce networking breakfast, two of my friends and I were standing in a circle talking. A stranger approached, interrupted our little reunion, and gave each of us her card. She then began talking about herself and her business without a hint of social awareness, or care about her interruption. She even had the tactless gall to ask us for referrals. When she left our small circle, we looked at each other and laughed, "What was that?" --
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Susan C. Young |
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"Be the "Liker" "If you want to be liked, BE THE LIKER!" This was some of the best advice my enlightened mother ever gave me. Throughout my childhood, teen years, and adulthood, this golden nugget of simple wisdom empowered me to take personal responsibility for developing friendships. When you want to reach out, make new friends, and increase your likeability factor, step up and "like" others first. They will usually mirror your initiative and like you back."
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Susan C. Young |
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Take the initiative to introduce yourself. One morning I was sitting on a bike in a spinning class at my gym. There was a lady whom I did not know sitting on the bike next to me. As we waited for the instructor, I decided to break the silence and start a conversation. I took the initiative to introduce myself and within a few short minutes, I knew her children's names, how long she had lived in Madison, which exercise classes she preferred, and where they went for Christmas. When the class was over, I confirmed that I remembered her name correctly, reminded her of mine and shared that it was a true pleasure meeting her. A simple introduction turned a stranger into a fresh and delightful new acquaintance.
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Susan C. Young |
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Have you ever had a friend in need whose only request was the gift of your presence? When major life changes happen or tragedies hit, you can find out very quickly who your real friends are because they are the ones who SHOW UP.
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Susan C. Young |
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Imagine how many new friends you would make, how much new business you could create, and how much fun you could have by simply taking the initiative to be the inviter.
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Susan C. Young |
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Imagine how many new friends you would make, how much new business you could create, and how much fun you could have by simply taking the initiative to be the inviter. Try it today. Welcome new relationships into your life that would never have occurred otherwise.
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Susan C. Young |
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To gain greater understanding, clarity, and awareness, you must become aware of your values and beliefs. Think of a triangle or an iceberg. Below the waterline, your beliefs and your values build the foundation for your behavior.
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Susan C. Young |
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"I disagree with the adage, "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." Good intentions are powerful mindsets which will drive your actions to accomplish the results you want. Setting good intentions sets you up for success by providing you with a vision and a plan to "get 'er done" and make it happen!"
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Susan C. Young |
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Navigating relationships within our own culture can be challenging enough. When diverse cultures are involved, however, a huge potential for misunderstanding, disrespect, miscommunication, and intolerance is present.
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Susan C. Young |
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ASK YOURSELF: Do you remember a gracious hostess, an engaging guest, or someone who worked the room like a honey bee in a flower garden? They would glide from one person to the next, spreading good will and cheer, being the glue that brought everyone together with ease.
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Susan C. Young |
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"Mix * Be situationally aware and pay attention to the people in the room. * Introduce guests or help strike up a conversation. * Be the one who takes the initiative and makes and effort to "work the room." * Make eye contact and acknowledge others with a smile and friendly gestures. * Greet people as they arrive, even if it is not your expected role. * Spot the people who may be first timers or guests and help them feel more welcomed and embraced."
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Susan C. Young |
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Graciously Accepting a Compliment. How many times have you offered someone a sincere compliment only to have it thrown back in your face as if your assessment were wrong? How did you feel? Women are notorious for this social misstep and poor maneuver. Why do they do it? Rejecting a compliment makes the compliment-giver feel as though they should have said nothing.
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Susan C. Young |
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What is the motive behind your services? If it is self-centered, self-serving, and lacking consideration for others, then earning people's trust, rapport, and business will inevitably be more of a struggle. A self-serving agenda throws up red flags which stop relationships dead in their tracks. It can destroy trust, make people wary of your intentions, and push customers to your competition.
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Susan C. Young |
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"Years ago, my childhood friend Steve lost his father. Since Steve had left Tallahassee shortly after high school graduation, we had not seen each other for over a decade. Upon learning of his father's funeral, I made plans to attend to "be there." After the service, I approached the family's receiving line. When Steve saw me, he was stunned that I had made the effort to be there for him. We both cried as we hugged and he said, "I can't tell you what it means to me that you showed up." Showing up sends a message that you are a devoted friend, a team player, a dedicated parent, an inspiring leader, a loyal mate, and more." --
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Susan C. Young |
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Contextual awareness represents a continuum of behaviors, which illustrates how and why groups of people unite or divide among cultures.
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Susan C. Young |
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"Ignoring his advice, I got up, walked over, gently rested my hands on two of their shoulders and said, "Ladies, I have to tell you how much you have impressed me. I just moved to Madison from Florida and left behind all my girlfriends. I have been sitting over there admiring your friendships. You remind me so much of my girlfriends back home and I had to come over and speak with you." And without missing a beat, I next asked, "Can I be your friend?" They were so impressed by my sincere request, they kindly opened their circle and invited me in."
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Susan C. Young |
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Begin to take the initiative when you want to meet someone new. Be the one who steps forward first. Simply say hello and begin a conversation.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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I spend a great deal of time on airplanes traveling from one speaking engagement to the next. There have been times when I have sat for hours next to strangers with whom I never made eye contact or uttered a word. But then I have also met people with whom I engaged in such delightful conversation that it resulted in new business and referrals. The main difference was whether or not I took initiative to begin a conversation.
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Susan C. Young |
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Being grounded in your lifelong culture and your personal perspective, you are comfortable with the way you see things and may believe it is the best and only way.
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Susan C. Young |
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Your first words will not only shape your first impression, they can create amazing connections, lead you to your dream job, or help you discover a new best friend--or accomplish exactly the opposite.
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Susan C. Young |
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"Hostess with the Mostest "Think of a time when you have had a party in your home or had friends over for dinner. Didn't you want to make sure they were nurtured, cared for, and well-taken care of? Didn't you want your guests to interact with each other and enjoy the experience so they would remember it fondly?"
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Susan C. Young |
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You can certainly take the easy road and use the predictable and boring defaults like: * How are you doing? * How about this weather? * What do you do for a living? * Hi. My name is _________. What's yours? * Blah, blah, blah, blah . . . Break out of the defaults you have been using for years. Shake it up. Make it fun. Make it memorable. Dive in with more engagement and interaction. Taking the initiative to be more creative will help you build a bridge to close the gap.
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Susan C. Young |
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11 Ways to Be More Engaged 1. Care about others. 2. Be 100 percent in the moment. 3. Keep focus on the person you are serving. 4. Try to get involved, engaged, and interactive. 5. Show interest in what matters to other people by listening, acknowledging, and responding. 6. Arrive in the moment anticipating creating a valuable interaction for yourself and others. 7. Move towards the things that inspire you and provide a sense of joy and connection. 8. Reconnect with the essence of yourself and be grounded in that essential relationship. 9. Maintain eye contact and deliver the non-verbal cues that you are fully with the other person. 10. Limit distractions-- close the door, silence your phone, hold calls, put tasks aside, etc. 11. Show up to the moment being your best and giving your best.
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Susan C. Young |
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Just be Nice. Nice--this little word has a big meaning. Use it generously. Being nice helps people feel emotionally safe, allowing for more authentic, trusting, and happy interactions.
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Susan C. Young |
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Take the Initiative. Be proactive. If you want to rock your relationship results, it is going to take action, effort, initiative, and choosing to get in the game--so, step up, step out, and show up!
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Susan C. Young |
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Where my previous motivation had been a self-serving ambition, my new service mindset was dedicated to serving a vision greater than myself. Within a year, I quadrupled my income, and then I doubled it every year thereafter. This service mindset quickly taught me that by helping others achieve their goals, I could more easily achieve my own.
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Susan C. Young |
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The Service Mindset. When I began my real estate career at the age of twenty-two, I had a fresh Bachelor's Degree in Marketing in one hand and 'a tiger by the tail' in the other. I was on a mission to be successful in life and in business and make a lot of money in the process. Every goal I set was about Me. Me. Me! I was driven by: How much money could I make? Which property listings paid the biggest commissions? How many calls did I need to make to schedule new appointments? How many listings did I need to have to hit my target? You can see where I am going with this! Working full-time, nights and weekends, seven days a week, I only made eleven thousand dollars in the first year! I was tired, disillusioned, and knew that I had to either change careers or massively shift my mindset. I chose the latter. I took ALL focus off me and re-directed my time, energy, and resources to serving my clients. Their hopes, needs, and desires became my primary focus. How could I help solve their problems?
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Susan C. Young |
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The Service Mindset. When I began my real estate career at the age of twenty-two, I had a fresh Bachelor's Degree in Marketing in one hand and 'a tiger by the tail' in the other. I was on a mission to be successful in life and in business and make a lot of money in the process. Every goal I set was about Me. Me. Me! I was driven by: How much money could I make? Which property listings paid the biggest commissions? How many calls did I need to make to schedule new appointments? How many listings did I need to have to hit my target? You can see where I am going with this! Working full-time, nights and weekends, seven days a week, I only made eleven thousand dollars in the first year! I was tired, disillusioned, and knew that I had to either change careers or massively shift my mindset. I chose the latter. I took ALL focus off me and re-directed my time, energy, and resources to serving my clients. Their hopes, needs, and desires became my primary focus. How could I help solve their problems? And then EVERYTHING began to turn around . . .
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Susan C. Young |
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Service Beyond Self is Essential for Success Because It . . . * Builds credibility, trust, and customer satisfaction. * Strengthens your personal reputation and public image. * Fosters goodwill and makes people feel appreciated. * Helps you build healthy relationships with others. * Nurtures collaboration, participation, and cooperation. * Reaffirms a continuity of service for quality assurance, integrity, and reliability. * Saves money--it costs less to keep existing customers than it does to create new ones. When you do it right the first time, you don't have to fix it the next time. * Improves communication and builds rapport. * Fosters mutual respect and understanding * By providing other people with what they want, you will get more of what you want!
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Susan C. Young |
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To Move from Woe to Wow . . . Listen Attentively * Be fully present and give your customer your full attention. * Stay calm and remain patient. * Do not interrupt or become defensive. * Let the customer express his or her concerns. * Nod your head and use affirming words to show that you are listening. * Repeat back and empathize, when necessary. This confirms your understanding of the problem or question.
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Susan C. Young |
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Considerations & Exceptions for Impressive Handshakes * Be mindful of a person's age; be tender with arthritic hands. In that case, a loose and gentler handshake is a gesture of sensitivity and compassion. * Show interest; even if your right hand is full, offer your left hand. * Demonstrate respect when you are caught in an introduction while seated; try to stand. * Be instinctive about when to allow the length of your handshake to linger to express unity, connection, or sympathy.
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Susan C. Young |
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"All hugs are not created equal. Some people are naturally gifted in showering others with warmth and affection. They can hug with such a sincere intention it transcends a handshake. Their hugs feel genuine, non-threatening, and are emotionally consistent with the relationship they share with the "hugee."
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Susan C. Young |
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Hugging is quite an intimate contact. Considering the studies done on proxemics we looked at earlier; when you get within two feet of another person you are inside their intimate space. There are some people who truly do not want you in their 'bubble' unless you are close friends or they've given you permission. Assuming familiarity incorrectly can destroy rapport, make a bad impression, and risk everything you have done well up to then.
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Susan C. Young |
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Impeccable manners and courteous behavior are the hallmarks for healthy relations and human interaction.
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Susan C. Young |
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"Approachability. Being warm and inviting demonstrates comfort, care, and emotional safety all of which encourages engagement. Your openness says, "I'm happy to meet you and am glad you're here."
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Susan C. Young |
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"Take the initiative with deliberate steps to be a polite person: 1. Cover your mouth when you cough or sneeze. 2. Reciprocate a thoughtful word or a good deed in kind. 3. Say "excuse me" when you bump into someone, unintentionally violate someone's space, or need to get someone's attention. 4. Apologize when you've made a mistake or are in the wrong. 5. Live by the "Golden Rule" and treat others the way you would like to be treated. 6. When dining at home or in a restaurant, wait until everyone is served before eating your meal. 7. Acknowledge notable events like birthdays, weddings, and anniversaries."
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Susan C. Young |
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ASK YOURSELF: Are you presenting yourself in the best of all lights, online and off, and demonstrating the dignity of good manners? Make sure of it! If not, it may come back to haunt you.
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Susan C. Young |
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Finding the good in others is mutually rewarding for both you and the fortunate recipient of your kind words. Don't you love being around people who make you feel great about yourself? Don't you want to do business with people who make you feel valued and important? Wouldn't you rather work with people who appreciate and respect you? Of course you would! Now go out and do that for others! When you become a generous good-finder you will infuse positive energy, optimism, and good will into their lives, as well as your own.
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Susan C. Young |
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Polishing the gold in others will not only make them feel better about themselves, but it will also elevate you in their eyes as well as your own. Gifting others with your words of affirmation is an easy yet generous way to spread goodwill and create a positive experience for everyone.
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Susan C. Young |
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To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . take the time to mine the gold. Actively seek the goodness in others then express your gratitude for it. Excavate the dirt, seek the treasure, and polish their gold to shine boldly and brightly. People will rise to your positive expectations and belief in them.
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Susan C. Young |
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All compliments are not created equal. Some may change the trajectory of a person's life, while others fall on deaf ears. Is it well deserved or earned? People will remember you fondly when you have affirmed them in a positive way. Paying compliments creates good will, happy moments, and makes you more likable in return.
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Susan C. Young |
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The next time you have a high-stakes meeting, a presentation, or an important social engagement, practice power posing beforehand to potently and powerfully impact your confidence.
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Susan C. Young |
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Poor Posture Promotes . . . In addition to sabotaging people's perceptions and impressions of you, poor posture can cause uncomfortable health issues: * Fatigue * Discomfort * Neck and back pain * Muscle imbalance * Headaches and body aches * Structural changes to your body
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Susan C. Young |
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Communication is the soul of all relationships. More than any other skill, it is the heartbeat of success in sales, marketing, marriage, business, friendship, communities, and beyond.
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Susan C. Young |
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Although it may serve you well, any strength or skill which is overused can become a limitation when it forces you to constantly be moving and looking for the next best thing. Distractions, interruptions, and incessantly chasing after the next golden ring can become the norm.
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Susan C. Young |
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Think of the communication that takes place in your own life on a continuous basis--at home, at work, with friends, and beyond. When you actively listen to people, you enhance communication.
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Susan C. Young |
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Listening actively confirms for people that you are positively receiving and thoroughly understanding the message they are conveying.
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Susan C. Young |
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Your tone demonstrates. . . * Energy * Volume * Sincerity * Confidence * Happiness * Sadness * Preoccupation * Anger * Efficiency * Empathy
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Susan C. Young |
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"Active listening is the ultimate "Golden Rule" for sensational customer service. Just as the important people in your life will feel more valued and appreciated when you actively listen, so will your customers."
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Susan C. Young |
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Active listening is one of the best services a company can provide.
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Susan C. Young |
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ASK YOURSELF: How can you utilize active listening to provide sensational customer service? How will this help resolve complaints from unhappy customers? * Give them your full attention and listen without interruption or defensiveness. * Thank them for bringing the issue to your attention. * Take their concerns seriously and share their sense of urgency to resolve the problem quickly. * Ask questions and focus on what they are really saying. * Listen to their words, tone of voice, body language, and most importantly, how they feel. * Beware of making assumptions or rushing to conclusions before you hear their concern fully. * Explain, guide, educate, assist, and do what's necessary to help them reach the resolution. * Treat them with respect and empathy. When you do an amazing job of resolving an unhappy customer's problem, you may end up impressing them more than if the problem had never occurred. You may have just earned their loyalty . . . forever!
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Susan C. Young |
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This method enabled me to expand my territory and create a strong network of loyal customers for referrals and repeat business. Make active listening a deliberate part of your business plan and success strategy. You will not only grow your business, but also make wonderful friends along the way.
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Susan C. Young |
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"Years ago, I read Andrew Carnegie's metaphor "developing people is like mining gold." He shared that sometimes you must move tons of dirt to find an ounce of gold. Every one of us has dirt because we are all imperfect and fallible. However, within each of us lies a vein of gold. When you find this treasure, regardless of how small, and begin to polish it, a person will shine so brightly the dirt falls away."
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Susan C. Young |
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To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Flip your positivity switch: What is your first instinct? If you are quick to find fault, look for the negative, or complain about another person, knock it off! It makes you less fun to be around. When you feel those negative thoughts and judgments coming in, catch yourself and STOP!
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Susan C. Young |
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Move beyond yourself to serve a greater purpose and vision. Learn to mix, mingle, and glow, thus helping others feel more comfortable, at ease, important, and connected.
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Susan C. Young |
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A simple handshake is not always a simple handshake. The way it is delivered can take on a million meanings and interpretations. As with every other form of body language and non-verbal communication, you are sending silent messages simply by the way you shake hands.
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Susan C. Young |
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Your handshake has the power to reveal your strength of character, make a promise, demonstrate your level of respect, exercise your etiquette, and represent your business acumen. Learning how to do it well will take you far in life and in business.
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Susan C. Young |
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"To cultivate bravery and courage, reduce uncertainty by being prepared. As Zig Ziglar once said, "Success happens when opportunity meets preparation." Preparing well for potential outcomes will provide you with a safety net if there is a hiccup, glitch, or temporary setback."
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Susan C. Young |
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Look for all of the possible missteps in the following scenario. My friend Amy arrived at a consultation with her Hispanic business partner. The African American woman to whom they were delivering their presentation was a long-time friend of her partner's. Her partner was greeted with a hug and Amy was greeted with a handshake. The meeting was a great success. As it came to a close, the two friends hugged. With enthusiastic affection, Amy went to hug the African American client. The woman took a step, turned her shoulder to block the hug, and looked at Amy with dismissive anger. It was almost a defensive move. Her partner, recognizing this, put her arm around Amy to soften the situation and make light of the inappropriate gesture. Everything turned out fine, but Amy was baffled by the barrier. She was confused by the woman's reaction since their interaction had been cordial and positive. She wondered if she had been socially insensitive or culturally inappropriate. After much reflection, however, she realized that she had simply been too quick to assume familiarity. Thankfully, she earned and learned the lesson quickly to become more aware. Amy eventually earned the trust of her client and secured her valuable business.
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Susan C. Young |
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Smiling and Expressions of Emotion. A genuine smile is inviting, contagious, and encouraging. People do read a book by its cover and your expressions provide a glimpse for what they'll find inside.
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Susan C. Young |
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Eye Contact. Direct eye contact is one of the best compliments you can give to another. You are subliminally telling them that you are listening, they matter, and that what they have to say is important.
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Susan C. Young |
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ASK YOURSELF: Do you appear self-confident or unsure? Do you project a calm demeanor or scream instability? Do you come across as a leader or try to stay invisible? Do you walk with purpose and intention or doubt and trepidation? Do you look vibrant and energetic, or stressed out and overwhelmed?
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Susan C. Young |
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Poised Positioning * Be mindful of how you use your body to communicate. * Be fully present in the moment. * Be thoughtful and gracious in your actions. * Be fluid and elegant in your movements. * Express flow--walk in freedom and spontaneity. * Develop an unshakeable sense of authentic inner confidence and certainty. * Develop a deep respect for others. * Move slower and more deliberately. * Walk in integrity, class, and modesty. * Smile kindly and laugh softly. * Become a student of manners and etiquette.
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Susan C. Young |
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Becoming more socially aware involves greater understanding of the dynamics of social interactions to assure you achieve harmonious outcomes.
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Susan C. Young |
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"In years gone by, particularly in the East and the South, ladies would attend charm school to learn how to elegantly stand, sit, dance, and walk. Even today, there are "Cotillion" classes for young people to learn how to carry themselves with dignity and use proper social graces. I don't mind sounding old-fashioned because these culturally rich rituals lay a firm foundation for the appropriate behaviors and excellent manners necessary for a positive impression. Embracing a tried and true tradition can sometimes be beneficial. Let's avoid the awkward, embarrassing, and unsophisticated ways we see all too often."
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communication-skills
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Susan C. Young |
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9 Reasons Why Improving Your Posture is Important By projecting strength and excellence in your physical presence, you will. . . 1. Look better and feel better. 2. Appear, and be, more fit and healthy. 3. Powerfully influence your mindset. 4. Appear more confident, self-assured, and competent. 5. Carry yourself with more purpose and intention. 6. Breathe deeper and get more oxygen in your body, which will improve your energy and health. 7. Reduce or prevent back pain and muscle tension. 8. Improve productivity by energizing your physiology. 9. Make a significantly more positive impression.
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Susan C. Young |
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What Does Poor Posture Look Like? * Stiff & rigid * Slumping * Slouching * Hunched over * Rounded shoulders * Overly arched back * Stumbling * Head forward In sensitivity, we must be aware that many people suffer from poor posture because of physical disability, injury, health issues, heredity, obesity, or musculoskeletal construction. These descriptions are not meant to offend or judge people who are unable to change their posture.
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Susan C. Young |
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"In his book, How to Win Friends & Influence People, Dale Carnegie encourages you to greet people with "animation and enthusiasm." This form of kinesthetic responsiveness provides a splendid example of how impactful your gestures can be while responding to others. Whether it be running up to an old friend you have not seen in a while or standing up to greet a business associate when he approaches your table, being kinesthetically responsive is an impactful way to gesture your level of interest, engagement, and enthusiasm."
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Susan C. Young |
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"In her book, Ask Outrageously! my friend Linda Swindling suggests to "Mimic the body language of the most powerful people you know. They stand up straight, make appropriate eye contact, and use gestures to convey their points. Look at their feet. Usually they are placed about shoulder-width apart. They have an open stance. They smile and nod when they agree." Begin paying attention to the poise, postures, and gestures of the people whom you admire and respect the most. How do they carry themselves to project excellence? Adapting their behaviors may serve you well to enhance and improve your body language."
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Susan C. Young |
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"In the hit movie, "Pay It Forward," a middle school child dreams of how he can change the world by being the catalyst for kindness. He begins his "social experiment" by performing a selfless act of kindness, and so begins the domino effect. As each consecutive person receives an act of kindness they, in turn, do something nice for another. The kindness becomes contagious and changes hundreds of lives for the better. Think of the global impact we could make if more people would make it their mission to simply pay if forward by BEING NICE."
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Susan C. Young |
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"Have you ever had a legitimate complaint as a customer which made you angry, upset, or frustrated? How was it "handled?" If you were dealing with an inept, uncaring, or untrained employee, they may have made matters even worse by being rude, defensive, or apathetic. Simple acknowledgment and validation of your complaint is sometimes all that is needed. Without it, you're left frustrated or upset."
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Susan C. Young |
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ASK YOURSELF: Have you found that being nice to some people is simply not effective? When might it be wise to throw down the gauntlet and get tough or confrontational?
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"While you will certainly attract more bees with honey, there are times when being nice can backfire. Take it from a naturally kind person, being a "bitch" has its time and place. There will be times when you must engage with mean, rude, and inconsiderate people."
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Susan C. Young |
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"Being Nice Has Its Limitations. While you will certainly attract more bees with honey, there are times when being nice can backfire. Take it from a naturally kind person, being a "bitch" has its time and place. There will be times when you must engage with mean, rude, and inconsiderate people."
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Susan C. Young |
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4 Times to Get Tough . . . 1. Self-Respect--You don't have to take everything on the chin and lose the respect of yourself and others in the process. Don't be a doormat or a pushover by allowing people to disrespect or run over you. Stand firm in your beliefs and values. 2. Self-Preservation--Understand and set boundaries. Decide what is and what is not acceptable in how people treat you. Claim your power to live life on your terms and not at the whims of others' unreasonable requests and demands. 3. Protecting others--If you are a parent of a child or a caretaker of the elderly or disabled, it is your moral duty to defend them to the end. 4. Self-Defense--Have you ever felt threatened, unsafe, or abused because of another's behavior? Assert yourself and do whatever is necessary to ensure your safety. Being kind DOES NOT mean you should excuse such behavior.
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Susan C. Young |
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"Whoever came up with the idea that "nice guys finish last" must have been either very jaded or downright malicious. Why would a caring, emotionally healthy human being ever think that being "un-nice" is a virtue? Anyone who wants to get ahead in life and have quality outcomes needs to understand that kindness is a strength. You will move forward faster by making friends rather than foes."
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"17 Ways to Just Be Nice "No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted." --Aesop 1. Be sincere. 2. Be altruistic. 3. Practice patience. 4. Inquire and engage. 5. Keep your promises. 6. Offer help to others. 7. Acknowledge others. 8. Control your behavior. 9. Be situationally aware. 10. Be polite and courteous. 11. Use considerate manners. 12. Greet people with a smile. 13. Practice random acts of kindness. 14. Show respect for yourself and others. 15. Be complimentary and look for positives. 16. Walk in another's shoes to understand their needs. 17. Share of yourself without expecting anything in return."
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Susan C. Young |
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It's not bravery unless you are doing something which causes you to feel afraid. Unless there is some degree of fear or apprehension involved, bravery is not even needed.
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Susan C. Young |
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"Google Proves Nice Counts. On a quest to discover what it takes to build the "perfect team," Google launched the Project Aristotle initiative to find the answers. Over a period of several years, they surveyed hundreds of teams, conducted interviews, analyzed studies, and observed how team members interacted with one another. Google's findings revealed that "psychological safety" is the key ingredient for creating a high-functioning team. It nurtures a healthy environment that encourages freedom of expression, engaging communication, empathy for one another, caring, support, respect and, drum roll please . . . BEING NICE!"
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Susan C. Young |
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Every time you speak, you are using your voice to connect with others, whether it is in-person, on the phone, or in a recorded message.
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Susan C. Young |
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The Art of Action explores specific action steps you can take for personal and professional transformation. Start by taking the initiative to be kind, courageous, and polite.
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Susan C. Young |
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Become a 'good finder' and seek to acknowledge the best you see in others.
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Susan C. Young |
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Is your voice value delivering the image you wish to convey? Is your voice coming across as smart, friendly, and positive or ignorant, rude, and negative?
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Susan C. Young |
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"The way you deliver the words you say becomes your "vocal image. This "vocal image" can make or break your first impressions, impact your communication, and determine how people respond to you."
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Susan C. Young |
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What can you do to ensure that your voice value translates into impression value?
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Susan C. Young |
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Every professional voice coach worth their salt will bring you back to the importance of tone, pace, and pitch. While these concepts were introduced earlier in The Art of Body Language section, we can now elaborate and take a deeper dive into how you can use your voice to improve your communications.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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It is generally believed that nearly 40 percent of your first impression will be set from the tone of your voice. Your vocal thermometer can be more impactful than the actual words you use.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Your tone of voice can be conveyed in both the words you speak and in the words you write.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Your tone can represent the character of your business, the strength of your resolve, and express the depths of your convictions.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Does your tone match your intention? Is your tone of voice confusing or clarifying? Are you coming across to others as you had hoped? Once you begin to notice your tone, you can adjust as needed to make it work in your favor.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Heed Your Speed. Are you a fast or a slow talker? Be mindful towards the person with whom you are speaking to ensure that your message is being comprehended, understood, and absorbed. If they are listening at a slower rate than you are speaking, disconnect can occur.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Align your voice value with the tone, pace, and pitch of your listeners will help you connect on all levels.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Have you ever paid notice to the full sound range of your voice? If you have ever been in a chorus or a singing group, you already know that they will separate the group based on each singer's pitch and assign their roles accordingly. While my speaking voice has a soprano pitch, my singing voice is a lower alto.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Being proactive and intentional will enable you to create a positive experience for yourself and others.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Some people not only burn their bridges, but they also torch the town! With all their deeds of drama and destruction, they leave behind an aftermath of distrust, disrespect, and disappointment. And for what? This behavior creates immeasurable suffering in all directions. It ruins reputations and business deals, shatters lives--and closes doors which can never be re-opened. These repercussions can be prevented or avoided by simply BEING NICE.
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Susan C. Young |
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Active listening requires being fully present and engaged in the moment.
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Susan C. Young |
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When you are mindfully focused, the person with whom you are communicating feels that you are making them a priority--that you value their time and their perspective. It is in these moments that we can go to deeper levels of discovery, exploration, and connection. It is one of the most valuable gifts and finest compliments you can give to another.
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Susan C. Young |
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To Become an Attentive Listener . . . * Observe a person's physical presence to see how their body language aligns with their message. * Recognize what is being said on the surface. * Engage your intuition to hear the meaning, purpose, and motivation behind their message. * Be aware of your own internal responses and how you are feeling. * Put yourself in their shoes to better understand their perspective.
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Susan C. Young |
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Becoming an empathetic listener helps you to better understand how another person feels and why they communicate as they do.
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Susan C. Young |
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Your heightened awareness of their perceptions, experiences, emotions, and personality styles can reveal why they feel the way they do so that you can choose your responses wisely and compassionately.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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My success with customers on the telephone wasn't by using pushy sales methods, but by engaging people in meaningful conversations which could lead to friendships on the phone before I ever met them. I would ask questions, listen to their stories, respond to their needs, develop rapport, and earn their business. When we would finally meet in person, it felt less like an introduction and more like a reunion. It was not only good business, we had fun in the process!
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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For sixteen years, I had a spectacular real estate career in Tallahassee, Florida. I loved receiving telephone inquiries and making cold calls. I knew that if I could meet people on the phone, I could usually turn them into buyers.
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communication-skills
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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14 Ways to Become an Incredible Listener 1. Be present and provide your undivided attention. 2. Seek first to understand, then to be understood. 3. Listen attentively and respond appropriately. 4. Minimize or eliminate distractions. 5. Focus your attention and energy with singleness of purpose on what the other person is saying. 6. Quiet your mind and suspend your thoughts to make room in your head to hear what is said--in the moment! 7. Ask questions and demonstrate empathy. 8. Use your body language and nonverbal cues constructively and pay attention to theirs. 9. Follow the rhythm of their speech; hear their tone. 10. Repeat and summarize what you have heard them say to confirm understanding. 11. Be open-minded and non-defensive. 12. Respond rather than react. 13. Be respectful, calm, and positive. 14. Try to resolve conflicts, not win them.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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"Well Hello Halo! It is human nature for us to make generalized judgments about a person using only a couple of traits. The "Expressivity Halo" Theory explains how we connect various personalities to specific facial expressions and assign assumptions about that person." --
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Proper posture conveys that you are ready to take command and master new situations. When you project this level of confidence, you will instill confidence in others.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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"In 1966, American anthropologist Edward T. Hall specified four distinct distance zones to describe the perception of physical space around us. Understanding these zones and honoring their invisible boundaries will give you a sixth sense about another person's "space" as well as your own. Intimate Zone (less than 2') --This zone represents our personal space and is reserved for the most trusted and loved people in our lives. Touching, hugging, standing side by side, and engaging in private conversations is common and encouraged. When an interloper violates this personal space, great discomfort and awkwardness can be created. What to do? Take a step back or sideways. Personal Zone (2'-4') --This is the distance for interaction with good friends, family, social gatherings, or parties. It's an easy and relaxed space for talking, shaking hands, gesturing, laughing and making faces. Social Zone (4'-12') --This zone seems to be an appropriate distance for casual friends, colleagues, and acquaintances to interact. It is the comfortable distance we maintain while interacting or addressing large groups of people. Public Zone (over 12') --This is the distance we keep from strangers or persons with little acquaintance. It provides the greatest distance between people. This is a safe space that still allows us to experience community and belonging with new people."
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communication-skills
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Smiling is truly one of the most generous gifts you can give to another. You never know when your smile may inspire the sad, encourage the hopeless, heal a heart, or change someone's world for the better.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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A genuine smile is your best fashion accessory and the most important thing you can wear.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Research by the Income Center for Tradeshows found that people are twice as likely to remember you if you shake hands. According to the American Management Association, it takes only one-fortieth of a second to create a human bond. Whether you shake someone's hand, squeeze their arm, or touch their shoulder, make these moments count to be remembered favorably.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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To cultivate bravery and courage, try something new for the first time. Take a chance. Stretch beyond your familiar limits by taking risks that move you out of your old mindset and into a new perspective. Once accomplished, trying something new bolsters your confidence and boosts your ability to be brave.
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Susan C. Young |
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And as is often the case, the people who would benefit the most from reading a book like this are the ones least likely to buy and read it. For you, however, this chapter will serve as a sterling reminder to make your manners shine.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Glow What can you do and how can you be in order to bring out the best in others and truly help them shine? * Be complimentary; say something nice. * Be a great listener and make them feel like you are hanging on every word. * Create enthusiasm and anticipation for the person they are getting ready to meet. * Act as you have personally invited them to the party and help ensure they have a wonderful time. * Give people an experience, not just a conversation
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Susan C. Young |
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Any time you put yourself on the line, you risk (and maybe fear) failing, falling, being embarrassed, or looking stupid--none of which are comfortable.
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Susan C. Young |
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If being brave were easy, more people would be.
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Susan C. Young |
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It is unimpressive to not return what's been borrowed. Whether you have borrowed money, folding chairs, yard tools, or a popular book, always make sure you return to another person what is rightfully theirs. Lending it to you in the first place was a gift of trust and assistance. Being slow to give back in return may be considered rude.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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communication skills, quotes by Susan C Young, relationship quotes, how to be complimentary, motivational speaker Susan Young, positivity quotes, positive first impression quotes, susanspeaks.com, find the best in others
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how-to-be-complimentary
motivational-speaker-susan-young
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Make a list of positives: Whether you would like to nurture a healthy relationship or improve a toxic one, make a list of positives which you admire about the other person. Begin by identifying, acknowledging, and focusing on their good qualities. Your perspective and how you feel about the person will begin to shift. You will find it much easier to polish the gold from a perspective of gratitude and appreciation.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Brag about their accomplishments in front of others: For years, I have shared that the definition of a good friend is someone who says nice things about you behind your back. And the definition of a GREAT friend is someone who says GREAT things to others in front of you. One of the kindest things a husband or wife can do for their relationships is to brag about their partner's qualities to other people.
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Susan C. Young |
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To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Be complimentary: Find something positive to say to compliment another person. Whether they are being a great parent, dressing nicely, maintaining a gorgeous yard, or winning a recent 5K run, pick something to acknowledge which is noteworthy.
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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With your mind alert and your eyes wide open, you will be better able to assess your space and your place for optimizing exchanges and your communication impressions.
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Susan C. Young |
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When you are socially aware, you will realize whether you are forcing yourself into a conversation or have actually been invited to participate.
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Susan C. Young |
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"It is unimpressive to interrupt another person while they are talking. Interrupting someone in mid-sentence demonstrates that your focus is on yourself, not the person talking. I had a friend who used a humorous retort whenever someone would interrupt him. He would graciously, albeit sarcastically, say, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to speak while you were interrupting." It always got a laugh, yet he was cleverly letting the intruder know of his infraction without being too confrontational."
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Polishing the gold in others is easy to do and a valuable habit to develop to transform your relationship results. People will usually rise to the occasion and live up to your positive expectations.
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Susan C. Young |
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To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Say something nice! My wise mother raised us with the philosophy that if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. That is a Southern custom if there ever was one! It is easy to find fault, criticize, condemn, and complain--but none of these behaviors will help you enjoy positive relationship results.
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Susan C. Young |
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"To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Catch people doing things right: Outstanding leaders know that people will be more engaged, perform at higher levels, and be more loyal when they are appreciated and celebrated. Jeff West, international speaker and author of The Unexpected Tour Guide, shares that "People will jump over high hurdles, fight fires and break through walls for leaders who find them doing things right. Building that kind of chemistry is essential if a team is going to jell." Capitalize on the opportunity to notice what people are doing right at work and at home and they will deliver their best. As the old saying goes, "A person who feels appreciated will always do more than expected."
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motivational-speaker-susan-young
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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What are the key elements for a fabulous, well-delivered compliment? You . . . * are sincere and genuine. * give it freely without expecting anything in return. Your compliment is a selfless gift, not a boomerang. * are specific and detailed. * elaborate on why you like something. * describe how their positive virtue has positively impacted you. * can use adjectives for more colorful descriptions. * keep it positive. * say it like you mean it with intentional impact. * use discretion and good judgment. * leave no room for misinterpretation or misunderstanding. * say the right thing at the right moment and let it flow organically. Finding sincere ways to compliment others is a powerful way to make a great first and last impression.
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find-the-best-in-others
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motivational-speaker-susan-young
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Susan C. Young |
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Being brave requires taking deliberate action and doing something new that stretches you beyond your comfort zone.
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communication-skills
emotional-intelligence-quotes
initiative
motivational-speaker-susan-young
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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"When you are "off somewhere else" people notice. Have you found yourself in conversations in which you're so concerned about what you are going to say next, that you don't even hear what the other person is saying? Guilty as charged, right?"
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customer-service-quotes
engagement
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networking
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selling-success
susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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A smile is one of the most powerful and important body language cues we share with others--and as such a heartfelt emotion, it's impossible to express its effect on others in words.
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body-language-quotes
communication-skills
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law-of-attraction-quotes
motivational-speaker-susan-young
quotes-by-susan-c-young
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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It is through these facial expressions that we write and feel our life story, create lifelong social habits--through which we are received and perceived by a multitude of others. When you want to make a positive first impression, let your face know!
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communication-skills
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law-of-attraction-quotes
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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When my son was a teenager, he would use the 'poker face' tactic when I was lecturing, nagging, or suggesting. As a parent, it was maddening because I could not read his reactions! His stoicism would sometimes deflate my efforts or make me surrender in laughter, changing the subject all together.
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law-of-attraction-quotes
motivational-speaker-susan-young
quotes-by-susan-c-young
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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We are more likely to trust a person who is easier to read; they're easier to believe. Or we tend to think that an energetic and happy person will be more productive. Even traits such as competence, dominance, and courage can be conveyed by certain facial expressions and will stimulate unconscious bias.
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communication-skills
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law-of-attraction-quotes
motivational-speaker-susan-young
quotes-by-susan-c-young
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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ASK YOURSELF: Are your facial expressions in alignment with your true personality? Are they working on your behalf to project the best impression possible?
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customer-service-quotes
expressions-of-emotion
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Susan C. Young |
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It has been said that poise is our highest state of consciousness. It reflects your presence, composure, balance, gratitude, discretion, and self-respect. Whether a man or a woman, a poised person carries within themselves an elegant air of dignity and grace. Their personal brand is polished and purposeful.
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communication-skills
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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Ask any person trained in sign language and they will confirm the fact that you can talk with your hands. Your hand gestures communicate for you and are an integral part of your language. While some people may come by hand gestures naturally, you can learn to be even more expressive to get your points across--and to be memorable.
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communication-skills
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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We must remember that some hand gestures which are commonly used and widely accepted in the U.S. might be considered rude or offensive in other countries. As always, I encourage you to be mindful of how and where you use certain gestures to assure you maintain your professionalism and positive impressions.
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communication-skills
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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"Many hospitality companies follow the "5 and 10 Rule," whereby when a customer is within ten feet of the employee, they should provide acknowledgement with eye contact and a genuine smile. When the customer is within five feet, it is encouraged to provide a warm welcome, sincere greeting, a friendly gesture, and offer to help, or to engage him or her in conversation."
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communication-skills
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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What is acceptable on a personal level is very different from what is acceptable on a business level. When we utilize touch well, we can elevate our presentation, demonstrate respect, and convey confidence. However, when we use touch poorly, it can be disastrous, personally and professionally.
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communication-skills
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susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |
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A strong handshake conveys confidence, clarity, strength, and intention. As with everything else in life, if it is overzealous, it may be seen as aggressive, arrogant, or dominating. A bone-crushing vice-grip is just plain obnoxious and one of the fastest ways to make someone angry.
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communication-skills
customer-service-quotes
emotional-intelligence-quotes
handshake-quotes
motivational-speaker-susan-young
quotes-by-susan-c-young
relationship-quotes
susanspeaks-com
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Susan C. Young |