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13bd51d
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Stop, I said. Please do not further endorken yourself to me. You have a great hair, and a car that is most fly, and you have just saved me with your mad ninja driving skills, so do not sully your heroic hottie image in my mind by further reciting your nerdy scholastic agenda.
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Christopher Moore |
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2a749c3
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And without guilt and dread, who am I?
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Christopher Moore |
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f9160a0
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Audrey felt herself blush again and suddenly, and for no reason she could think, thought of poor Lizzie from Pride and Prejudice, and then remembered how she also felt that Lizzie, nay, all of the Bennet women, in fact, all of the characters in P&P could have benefited from a good roundhouse kick to the head,
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Christopher Moore |
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b99dc2c
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You don't have to explain why a character pulled the kid from the freezing river, but there better be a pretty good reason why he held that kid under.
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Christopher Moore |
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ad49b49
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chaos is the condition between order and disorder, the transition between one system and another.
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Christopher Moore |
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fb02fac
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I'm Asian." She wasn't Asian, but there would be a metric fuckload of Asian girls on the bridge for him to think were her. "Ten minutes. Don't jump, okay?"
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Christopher Moore |
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0f2d3aa
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Protect and served, lunch--SFPD motto.
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Christopher Moore |
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1775681
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a chamomile chaser to Jane's vodka and sarcasm shooter.
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Christopher Moore |
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97abff2
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what kind of sociopathic fuck-weasel would do all the puzzles in Highlights in pen.
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Christopher Moore |
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a41005b
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will smack that bitch up and take her bag of quarters! I will not be fucked with!
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Christopher Moore |
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5fe9bc8
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You know why those guys with the bagpipes have daggers on their belts, right? So they can stab themselves in the fucking legs to take their minds off the music.
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Christopher Moore |
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a6e8f98
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I'm just going to try to save the woman I love, and that's as good as the world to me.
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Christopher Moore |
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7f2fa00
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That won't work, isn't Special Forces where everyone gets a hug?" Charlie called. "That's the Special Olympics," Rivera said"
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Christopher Moore |
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6c9c59b
|
I found you here, Augustus Brine, listening to the noise of the universe, holding in your heart a spark of hope, like all fishermen, but resolved to be disappointed.
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Christopher Moore |
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21822e7
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He looked like he'd shown up at the sacrificial mass of the damned ready to fix the dishwasher.
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Christopher Moore |
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fc6aaed
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God is a comedian playing to an audience that is afraid to laugh. VOLTAIRE
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Christopher Moore |
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b570177
|
There are those who, deprived of physical beauty, develop a sincerity and beauty of spirit that seems to eclipse their appearance. They marry for love, stay married, and raise happy children who are quick to laugh and slow to judge.
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life-as-an-ugly-person
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Christopher Moore |
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65ee883
|
What if he isn't really the last of his kind, but the first of ours?
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Christopher Moore |
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49ec387
|
So I like slept till eleven, because we're on Christmas break, only it's called winter break now because Jesus is AN OPPRESSIVE ZOMBIE BASTARD AND WE DO NOT BOW DOWN TO HIS BIRTHDAY! At least not at Allen Ginsberg High School, we don't. (Go, Fighting Beatniks!) But it's all good, 'cause I'm going to have to get used to getting up later if I'm going to be a creature of the night.
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Christopher Moore |
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204f583
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I'll be fine. The ready kit you packed covered everything, I think. In fact, I may not even need the fire extinguisher.
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Christopher Moore |
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c853de4
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Why, I'll bet my uncle Davey could take you out in the first round, ya macaroon.
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Christopher Moore |
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65ab26f
|
There was something unsettling about carrying an animal to its death. It wasn't that I hadn't seen the sacrifices before, nor even eaten the Passover lamb, but this was the first time I'd actually participated. I could feel the animal's breathing on my neck as I carried it slung over my shoulders, and amid all the noise and the smells and the movement around the Temple, there was, for a moment, silence, just the breath and heartbeat of the ..
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Christopher Moore |
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a137119
|
Sin valor para arriesgar la vida por nuestro hermano, no somos mas que politicos: vociferantes putas de la retorica
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inspirational
true-friends
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Christopher Moore |
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53744dd
|
How we doing on the Beatitudes?" "Pardon me?" "The blesseds." "We've got: Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after righteousness; blessed are the poor in spirit, the pure in heart, the whiners, the meek, the--" "Wait, what are we giving the meek?" "Let's see, uh, here: Blessed are the meek, for to them we shall say, 'attaboy.'" "A little weak." "Yeah." "Let's let the meek inherit the earth." "Can't you give the earth to the whiners?" "..
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Christopher Moore |
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350b02c
|
Great heroes have Great horniness.
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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283fdf9
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You think you know how this story is going to end, but you don't. Trust me, I was there. I know.
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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295451f
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Moses should have said "Let my people go. Please."
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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663ff7d
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When the oil of the lamp is used up the wanker shall light his own way to salvation.
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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5af1629
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Fornication with your daughters thats like a double dog sin.
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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d5eb255
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Your mother eats fungus from the feet of lepers.
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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0f81296
|
Sin is moist make a mental note.
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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2782e64
|
Oh to be young and in love (with 8 Chinese concubines).
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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19310a4
|
The Science you don't know looks like magic.
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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9f1ccb5
|
Heinous fuckery most foul!
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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ca63433
|
Said I, in perfect fucking French.
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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c15977a
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And once I shagged Regan on a platter of pork in front of Muslims.
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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27fad3e
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She's a bloody vision of loveliness.
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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b45b8a4
|
I shagged a ghost!
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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ad82de7
|
And so that is the story of how St. Rufus of Pipewrench was licked to death by marmots.
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Christopher Moore (author) |
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0106d89
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Fancy a spot of stony bonking before vespers?
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Christopher Moore (author) |