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e62d247 Are you absolutely sure you want to do this? Seems like maybe it would make more sense to call in a SWAT team or Special Forces." "That won't work, isn't Special Forces where everyone gets a hug?" Charlie called. "That's the Special Olympics," Rivera said over his shoulder." -- Christopher Moore
f9e753f They are between. Not what they used to be, and not what they have become. In those times, they are nothing. And I am invisible, and I am nothing too. That is the true demimonde, Lucien, and the secret is, it is not always desperate and dark. Sometimes it is just nothing. No burden of potential or regret. There are worse things than being nothing, my friend. Christopher Moore
6bc5f4f Abencoados sejam os submissos, pois a eles diremos "Lindos meninos"." Christopher Moore
0499d13 The measure of a man's power is the depth of his mercy. Christopher Moore
ed6a403 One day I was telling him that I thought that cars had replaced guns as phallic symbols for American men, and I thought it was interesting that he had one that was so small and fast. The next day he gave me the Datsun and went out and bought a Lincoln. datsun phallic guns Christopher Moore
8c0b58d Okay, you make eating hos sound pretty. talk poetry to me, writer boy.* Christopher Moore
fdd6661 No. Trust me, you have to leave me now so you won't later. I'll see you again. Christopher Moore
bc701cb So I'm like getting some perspective now - like when you're a kid and you think it sucks that you have to eat hydrogenated peanut butter on your PBJ, and then you see one of those starving commercials kids with flies in their eyes, who don't even have a sandwich - and you're all, 'Well, that sucks. Christopher Moore
531c44b Dovevi comportati bene con il prossimo, anche con i leccapiedi. E se: a) Credevi che Gesu fosse il Figlio di Dio b) Credevi che fosse venuto a salvarti dal peccato c) Riconoscevi la presenza dello Spirito Santo dentro di te (tornavi bambino, diceva lui) d) Non bestemmiavi contro il suddetto Spirito (vedi c) Allora: e) Avresti vissuto in eterno f) In un posto fichissimo g) Probabilmente in paradiso Se invece h) Peccavi (e/o) i) Ti comportav.. Christopher Moore
437074b I like big butts," Renoir explained to Toulouse-Lautrec." Christopher Moore
998932f Earth was totally unprepared for an enemy made of meat. Christopher Moore
a4f7ef1 These dogs are not fighting." "Yes they are. Like the paintings we saw in the Louvre," said Lucien. "Gecko-Roman wrestling Father called it." "Ah, of course," said Pissarro, as if it had become clear. "Yes, Gecko-Roman dog wrestling. Superb! I presume you haven't shown your wrestling dogs to Madame Lessard, then." Christopher Moore
9b4b575 What do you want? humorous-quotations Christopher Moore
90fa04f Rivera rubbed his temples. "Satan told you to do it?" he said wearily. "No." "Elvis?" "I told you, it's supernatural." elvis supernatural Christopher Moore
23c8e1e couldn't be more Scottish if it was painted blue and smelled of burning peat and your ginger sister. Christopher Moore
1b2bd76 Joshua grinned: "I think we'll both do better than my cousin John and his 'hold them underwater until they agree with you' sermon." Christopher Moore
2b5c053 He was a LEPER, you idiot! Not a leopard. Christopher Moore
d664512 Son, I'ma tell you something ain't nobody else in the world can tell you: you got no soul. And I'ma tell your future, too: you ain't never gonna get a soul, you keep makin' people's shit small." Evan's eyes started to roll back in his head and the big man shook him like dust mop until he came back to the room. "You ain't shit, Evan, and you ain't never gonna be shit until you show some passion for something. Y'all got to love something. Y'a.. Christopher Moore
dee92dc He started skipping, but then caught himself and returned to deliberately pacing out his steps with his sheathed sword. People might ignore a tiny Japanese man in an orange porkpie hat and socks, with a sword, but if you went around expressing unrestrained joy, they would have you in a straightjacket before you could belt out a verse of "Zippity Do-Dah." Christopher Moore
e30042b About to be hanged is my status quo, not a condition that requires your repair. Christopher Moore
be5363e While Alpha Males are often gifted with superior physical attributes--size, strength, speed, good looks--selected by evolution over the eons by the strongest surviving and, essentially, getting all the girls, the Beta Male gene has survived not by meeting and overcoming adversity, but by anticipating and avoiding it. That is, when the Alpha Males were out charging after mastodons, the Beta Males could imagine in advance that attacking what .. Christopher Moore
a84334d My children are monsters, Kiro thought. And I am responsible. Perhaps if I had read them the haikus of Basho when they were little instead of that American manifesto of high-pressure sales, Green Eggs and Ham... basho green-eggs-and-ham christopher-moore haiku capitalism Christopher Moore
3c62735 Y'all got to love something. Y'all got to hate something. Y'all got to want something. Pissing on other people's passion 'cause you trying to be cool just make you a coward--a Christopher Moore
28124be Action based on hope just felt better than the paralysis of certainty. Christopher Moore
971bc6d You can't just go around blurting out the truth like a prophet with Tourette's syndrome. Christopher Moore
5375dce The woman raised her voice. "I said, what are you doing?" Tommy kept typing and looked up. "Pardon me, I was ignoring you. What did you say?" "What are you doing?" She repeated. "It's a note. Let me read it for you. 'Couldn't anyone else see that they were all slaves of Satan? I had to cleanse the world of their evil. I am the hand of God. Why else would security have let me into the building with an assault rifle in my suitcase? I am a div.. Christopher Moore
ce69a12 Nobody likes a dead whore. Christopher Moore
b16dc67 To be safe is to be afraid. Christopher Moore
abe1dfc Abby to Tommy and Jody who are hugging] So I'm like, "Cold-faced killers on the clock, bitches, we don't have time for your bonery right now." --The Chronicles of Abby Normal" christopher-moore Christopher Moore
515ce71 She glanced over her shoulder to look at the forty-foot cabin cruiser where Captain Tarwater posed on the bow looking like an advertisement for a particularly rigid laundry detergent - Bumstick Go-Be-Bright, perhaps fluke Christopher Moore
1d6e8dd You love your wars for the coffers, but for the warrior and the widow, the orphan and the owned, you've not two dry fucks to give. Christopher Moore
a31fff7 Mankind, I suppose, is designed to run on--to be motivated by--temptation. If progress is a virtue then this is our greatest gift. (For what is curiosity if not intellectual temptation? And what progress is there without curiosity?) Christopher Moore
a9f0f1a There's no such thing as a conservative hero. Christopher Moore
6a67d19 The next day the weather was blown out, with whitecaps frosting the entire channel across to Lanai and the coconut palms whipping overhead like epileptic dust mops. fluke Christopher Moore
ae7d8d7 Getting a rise out of him was like trying to give a handjob to a parking meter: you were going to end up frustrated and exhausted long before a cop came along to haul you away. Christopher Moore
05bf2bd there's a shitload of insufferable know-it-all hipsters who will work for next to nothing for the privilege of condescending to customers about their musical knowledge. Christopher Moore
a1bcac6 She had the kind of legs that kept her butt from resting on her shoes--a size-eight dame in a size-six dress and every mug in the joint was rooting for the two sizes to make a break for it as they watched her wiggle in the door and shimmy onto a barstool with her back to the door. Christopher Moore
8e9c84b We were seekers. You are that which is sought, Joshua. You are the source. The end is divinity, in the beginning is the word. You are the word. jesus religion the-word seeking Christopher Moore
ba448dd Losers can only flourish until a dominant species appears Christopher Moore
820fbd7 At "tooth fairy," Sophie popped her head out the door. "I will smack that bitch up and take her bag of quarters! I will not be fucked with!" Christopher Moore
9be215d Multiple Personality Barbie. She's elegant, she's fashionable, and she's the reason that Ken has no genitals! Have fun, but remember to hide the sharp stuff! Christopher Moore
c9a51ff In business, as in politics, the public is ever so tolerant of those who slime. politics Christopher Moore
7bce4d9 Blessed are the minimarshmallows," the angel said, swooning a little." Christopher Moore
00b4770 You whoreson scalawag!" said I. "You flesh-turd dropped stinking from the poxy arsehole of a hare-lipped harlot!" Christopher Moore